A Friend In Need
by FMA-SN-Fan
Summary: Ed has a horrible drinking problem. Can Roy help before its too late? Rating for language, acoholism, Yaoi, and drug abuse in later chaps! don't like then don't read!
1. Explain It

Aright t this is a big step for me I never thought I would be righting a fic! Well as u can see this is my first fic so be nice plz thnx!

Chapter 1

"Aaaarrrggghhh, My head," Edward whined as he sat up and looked around. He didn't have the slightest clue where he was. He sat their arms crossed over his knees looking at surroundings.

"Well Hell," he sighed and rested his head on his arms.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, then began to chuckle slow starting to laugh maniacally. As slowly as he started he stopped and looked around again. 'Wonderful,' he thought. Ed stood up but fell right back down, he looked to his left and grabbed a bottle and took a drink and tried to stand up again failing miserably.

"SHIT I HATE THIS!" Edward yelled sitting up and silently started crying taking a huge gulp from the bottle.

"Maybe you shouldn't go out and drink every single night!" a deep yet caring male voice said.

Ed looked up, his vision was screwed the room was spinning, and blurry from tears.

A taller man was standing by the door, black hair. He was wearing jeans and a white shirt.

"Who the - are you?" He managed taking another huge swig of his whiskey.

"Shit Edward," he stated sounding almost annoyed, "How Much did u drink last night?" He walked over to Ed grabbing his drink from him.

"HEY! Whadda do it for? Give it back!" Ed stood leaning on the wall behind him.

"Let me think, How bout no?" He threw the bottle on the floor and smiled at the sound of it shattering.

"Bastard!" Ed clenched his fist and swung at the man, whom calmly grabbed his fist.

"You know Edward, I get a little sick of tracking your drunk ass down EVERYDAY! Edward you need to stop this! You don't even recognize your best friend!" he sound slightly depressed, that was the first time Ed didn't recognize him.

"You not my best friend! He wears military clothing and he is taller than me and has black hair and eyes. His eyes can scare me. Oh yeah his bastard too he steals my boozes and pours them out. Heeeeyy wait a minute you look a lot like him. Do you know Roy Mustang? Is you his brother?" Ed asked swaying to the left and looking to the right. "HA!" Ed picked up a different bottle and started trying to open it.

"No you drunk! I am Roy." He said firmly, slapping Ed's wrist sending the bottle flying.

"Damn it all!"

Ed fell to his knees and looked up at Roy quickly looking back down, "I'm so sorry"

"Whatever. Get up your coming with me!"

Ed stood up and took a step falling flat on his face. Roy sighed and helped him to the car. Ed sat in the passenger set of the car and looked up at Roy, who was standing there looking at Edward. He had an impatient look on his face.

"What?"

"Waiting," Roy looked at the bar. 'Old run down. Everything was dusty I don't think this was one of his normal parties-' Roy's thought were disturbed by the sound of vomit. "About time Edward" Roy smirked

"Bite me bastard! I'm fin—"Ed vomited again. Roy gave up on counting at the number eight. He turned and sat on the hood of the car,' this is bad he hasn't ever been this bad before. Damn he is making me feel sick.'

A rough cough broke Roy of his thoughts and he twisted his head around, "Ed? You Okay?" He walked toward Ed he was as white as a ghost and trembling. He had never done that before, "Shit Ed how –" he was cut off when Ed stood up and stepped over the pool of vomit and sat on the hood, Roy sat by him.

"You shouldn't come and find my sorry ass every morning. I'd find my way home."

"Well at least the alcohol is out of system, come on your staying with me today and tonight."

Ed blinked, "No take me home!"

"Edward Elric please don't start with me!" Roy was worried for Ed. "Ed, explain what happened here last night."

No reponse,"Ed you found an abandoned bar stock full and took advantage of it didn't you?"

Ed put his head in his hands, 'Oooohhhh damn it! Hangover BAD BAD hangover'

"You have any pain killers?"

"Yeah"

"Can I have some?"

"No"

"What? Why the hell not!?"

"You're going to suffer today."

"Great"

"Explain last night to me Ed."

"Why? You'll get pissed yell at me and piss me off."

"Not this time."

"Why do I have to explain it if you already know?"

"That's all you had to say, come on lets go. And yes your still coming with me."

"NO! Roy I'm 21 years old I can stand up on my own!"

"You obviously can't!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Ed stood and walked into the bar. Roy heard glass breaking, 'Here we go."

Roy stood and took a step toward the bar.

"ROY GO HOME!"

Ok that's the first chapter! Please review and be nice it's my first fic!


	2. Moving In

Ok I want to thank the one who left me a review! **EdwardElricsFan4Ever **I thank u again!

Chapter 2

"Edward just come out! Grab one bottle and come out. I won't steal it I swear." Roy yelled in the direction of the run down bar.

After of few seconds Ed walked out struggling with a bottle of whiskey.

Roy sighed, "Come on lets go."

Ed glared at Roy as he turned around, but followed Roy to his car.

Neither one of them said a word on the 30 minute ride to Roy's apartment.

Ed took one last drink of his whiskey and sighed, as they pulled into the apartment complex parking lot. Roy glanced over at Ed whom looked very depressed.

"Edward I'm not taking you home for a reason."

"You don't trust me, you want to help. Well guess what it isn't going to work!" Ed reached over and stole the keys out of the ignition.

"What's your room number?"

"27"

Ed took off and found the apartment with Roy silently following behind him in deep thought. Once Ed found the right door he quickly found the correct key and walked in. Throwing the keys on the table he looked around.

'Joy! One bedroom,' Ed thought sarcastically.

It was a small yet homey place. He walked into the kitchen and threw away the empty bottle. He turned to find Roy standing about 4 feet behind him.

"Edward how is this not going to help you?"

"Because, Roy, when I'm sober I start to remember Al…" Ed looked at the floor.

Ed walked place the frozen Roy in search of a pillow and blanket, he stole some off of Roy's bed and laid on the couch, facing the back of it.

"Edward. What Happened to Al? You never told me… or anyone come to think of it, it's been two years."

Roy asked slightly afraid of the answer.

Ed started trembling but didn't answer. Edward Had been down and depressed for the first year after Al passed on but now Ed has started drinking every night to the point Roy had to drag him home.

"Edward?"

"What?" Ed's voice cracked.

"Please answer me. I'll leave you alone for a little while after you do."

" ALPHONSE DIED BECAUSE I WAS A CARELESS BIG BROTHER! I KILLED HIM TWICE! AND TORTURED HIM FOUR ALMOST SIX YEARS!" He sat up yelled at Roy. "And I couldn't save him this time." Ed said in almost a whisper. Plopping back into his pervious position. "Sorry I yelled. Tender subject." Ed felt a tear roll down his cheek and he hid his face in the pillow.

"It's ok Ed. Don't hide tears from me." Roy stated and waiting a few seconds before asking his next question. "Ed? Can you please answer me?"

Ed sighed. "If I didn't drag him in that damn bar he'd still be alive and well. Working under me in the military like he always wanted to do." Ed buried his face again as Roy sat on the arm of the couch.

"I took him to this bar but he was hesitant about going in said he had a bad feeling about it… I guess I should have listening to him both times he said that. But I drug him in anyway. We had been in there about thirty minutes when I started drink my hard liquor because he didn't want to drink he could get us both home. But before I even got to my first drink some bastard started annoying the hell out of Al. I told Al to ignore him but that made it worse. I stood up for Alphonse and yelled at the guy………That's when he pulled out the gun and fired right at me but Al jumped in front of it. Instant…." Ed couldn't say another word just lay there crying silently.

"I'm sorry. Ed." Roy reached out and patted Ed on the back. Ed jumped. Roy arched a brow, "I'm sorry "

He went to his room. Ed sat straight up and wiped his eyes. 'Where is his boozes?'

Ed went into the kitchen and found Roy's wine locker. "Heh heh" Ed reached for the handle when he felt something on his shoulder. Ed froze and looked at his should only to find Roy's hand.

"Shit Edward! I leave the room for 2 seconds and you're off trying to steal my alcohol! I want you to give up drinking cold turkey! If you can't do it with just my help, then I'll be putting you in rehab! AND DON'T THINK I WON'T!"

"WHAT!?"

"Come on we're going to get your belongings your moving in with me for a while."

"NO YOU SAID ONE NIGHT!!"

"I changed my mind!"

" YOU A BASTARD! NO I'M NOT GOING WITH YOU!" Ed yelled.

"Fine I'll go alone!"

Roy reached for something on top of a cabinet. A lock, he locked the wine locker.

"Dumbass!" Ed clapped his hands and touched the lock. Then was painfully shocked.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!"

Roy smirked, "Alchemy proof! The doors and windows are the same the whole complex is! How stupid did you think I was?"

Edward growled, "Fine! I'll go with you!"

Roy laughed, "Once Again I Win!"

"You're a Bastard!"

"Thanks I'm Proud of it!"

"Shut up lets get this over with, General Shit!"


	3. This Problem

Ok I want to once again thank the two whom left me a review **megen EdwardElricFan4Ever**!!

And I am sorry for forgetting the disclaimer although I don't think it is all that necessary. I don't own Ed or Roy or FMA for that fact. Happy? Ok ON WITH THE STORY!!!!

Chapter 3

"So, Edward what are you bringing?"

"What's it matter to you?"

"Damn, I can't even try to start a conversation with out getting my head bit off anymore!" Roy smirked.

"Shut up I don't feel like listening to your shit."

"Aw that hurt. Poor Ed can't even stand a little conversation."

"DON"T CALL ME LITTLE!" Ed yelled, then mumbled under his breath "Damn bastard General"

"Same as ever Ed. How's your headache now?"

'Worse no thanks to you' Ed sighed, "Shut up and drive"

Roy let out a small chuckle and drove to Ed's apartment. Once they pulled into the complex's parking lot Ed sighed.

How long am I staying?"

"A while"

"You suck ass"

"Would you prefer rehab I happen to know a good place?"

"How do you know its good were you put in it?"

Roy glared in Ed's direction, "No smartass! My father was."

In Ed's apartment they walked around finding what Ed needed, kicking bottles and cloths to make a path to walk.

Roy wasn't helping much he just watched and waited. Ed was searching for something had been for a few minutes after packing all his cloths clean and dirty in a bag.

Roy sighed, "Why won't you just ask for help pipsqueak?"

Ed clenched his jaw and stood up, "Why the hell do you keep calling me small!? I stand 2 inches shorter than you!"

"Key word shorter."

"Arrgghh why must you keep doing this?"

"Its fun"

"And why is that?"

"Because even though your 21 you STILL flip out like child."

"I'm not a child!"

"I said nothing of the sort, Edward."

Ed growled and returned to his search.

"Are you going to tell me what you're looking for?"

"No."

"You have all your clothes and toothbrush...hmmm," Roy looked around and saw a little silver box under a pile of trash. He walked over and picked it up. "Is this it?"

Ed sighed and looked then stood, ' Damn it', "Yeah that's it thanks"

Roy handed the little box to Ed and picked up his bag.

Clank 

Roy blinked and looked at the bag, then to Ed, who was acting like nothing happened.

"Hmmm" Roy lightly shook the bag.

Clank 

"…hm…" Roy blinked again and opened the bag and pulled out three small bottles of hard liquor.

"Edward don't start this shit up, please." Roy stated and looked at Ed. Ed was standing there staring at the floor. Ed looked horrible, his eyes were bloodshot had been all day and they were clouded, he was so pale from lack of nutrition Roy assumed, he was in desperate need of a shower, and his hair was dirty and greasy. Roy looked back at the bag and went through it again in case he missed something. "Ed you have got to seriously try to stop drinking it isn't healthy. Have you looked in a mirror? You look horrible. When was the last time you ate?"

"I don't remember, Roy."

Roy sighed, "This is only going to get worse though I'm sure your aware of that."

"Yeah," Ed said, almost whispered. Roy looked at Ed in time to see a single tear fall from Ed's eye. Roy blinked a few times, "Your going to make it though this with my help."

"I could do this on my own Roy I really could, I promise."

Roy glared at Edward, "Edward I'm am disappointed in you! What kind of man makes a promise they can't keep?"

"Not a very good one."

Roy took a deep breath, "Ed I know you're a good person –"

"I'm a sinner, a dirty murderous sinner!"

"EDWARD! Stop that!"

"Stop what? Telling the truth?"

"Ed I don't know what your think but, you are no murderer!"

"What makes you say that?"

" BECAUSE THE PEOPLE YOU KILLED DESERVED TO DIE!"

"I KILLED ALPHONSE! WHAT DID HE DO TO DESERVE DEATH?"

EDWARD YOU DIDN'T KILL HIM! THE MAN AT THE BAR DID!"

"It was my fault!"

"No Ed it wasn't"

"Whatever"

"Did you ever kill a innocent person with your own two hands?"

Ed looked away from Roy and step his gaze upon a full bottle of whiskey on the floor. "No."

"Alright, they all deserved what they got then."

"Then why did Al die?"

"I don't know. This world is messed up and too many innocent people have to die for no good reason."

"Yeah I guess"

Roy turned to the table on the other side of the room a grabbed his car keys and Ed's apartment keys. Ed was already standing by the door with his bag and that box.  
"What's in that box?"

"Auto mail equipment."

"Ah."

Ed turned his back to Roy and head out the door.

"Hey Edward come here!"

"Why"

"Just listen to me!"

Ed walked over to Roy. "What?"

"Let me see that bag."

"Why?"

"Hand it over!"

"Shit Roy leave me alone."

Roy snatched the bag from Ed and pulled a bottle of whiskey out.

"Go Sit on the couch."

"Why?"

"Because you're going to sit and watch how I'm solving this problem!" Roy was irritated and Ed could hear it in his voice.

Ok here's the deal! Once I get 3 more reviews I will update! I don't care if there are good or bad! Insults are good lets me know what I did wrong! Thanks for sitting through this it means a lot to me!


	4. I Didn't?

EARLY UPDATE THANX TO **EdwardElricFan4Ever, Rizalicious, VadMustang, PuppylovePyro, and megen!** I list those in NO order what so ever!

Lmao I got some crazy ideas the funny thing is they halfway guessed a future chapter! WHICH ONE YOU WILL NEVER KNOW!!! MUHAHAHA lol I'm ok now

Disclaimer I own nothing with is good for my sanity!

Chapter 4

Ed just glared at Roy.

"SIT DOWN!"

"YOUR NOT MY COMANDING OFFICER! YOU NO LONGER HAVE CONTROL OF ME!"

Roy glared at Ed and put his hand in his pocket.

"SIT!"

"You're bluffing."

"LIKE HELL I AM"

SNAP 

"SHIT! Ok ok I'm sitting. Bastard."

"Thank you."

"YOU BURNT MY PANTS LEG CLEAN OFF!"

Roy laughed, "Only from the knee down on your left leg."

Ed growled and watch Roy pick up every bottle in the apartment and pour the contents down the kitchen sink.

Ed Sat there and watched Roy while becoming so very pissed!

Sighing Ed stood and walked into the kitchen glaring at Roy.

"What no fight?" Roy asked somewhat surprised.

"No what's the point? I'll lose and knowing you I would lose another limb. Two Auto mail is enough thanks." Ed looked at the floor. Pain and sorrow was in his voice nothing more or less.

"Roy I-I just wanted-" Ed stopped and looked at the floor. A tear hit the floor and he quickly wiped his eye.

"Edward?"

"-Say sorry. That you have to see me like this. I mean I-I appreciate what you're trying to do but it won't work. It just-"

That's when the wall broke Ed started sobbing uncontrollably.

"It's ok Ed. It really is"

When Ed calmed down enough to speak he turned and punch the wall, "Why am I such a FRICKING CHILD!"

Sobbing again He plopped down on the floor hugging his knees. He tried to talk but he couldn't breathe.

"Ed It's ok to cry it only makes you human. Go ahead and let it out." Roy walked over and sat next to him on the floor, "I didn't see a tear from you at Al's funeral. Even I cried there. I just wasn't open about it. You've been holding this back all these years." Roy put a supportive arm over his shoulder.

"Shhhh Ed. It's ok. I'm going to help you though this, all the way."

"No I-it's no-ot! Y-yo-u sh-ou-l-d-n't Ha-ve t-to d-oth-this." He managed between sobs.

Roy sighed, "Ed this is what friends are for. To help and be there for you."

Ed started crying harder causing his body to shake.

"Shhhh Ed. It's ok calm down alittle bit Shhhh."

"DAMN IT ALL!" Ed jumped up grabbed his stuff and darted out the door.

"EDWARD!" Roy was right behind him.

"I'm going to the car we can talk later!"

Ed got in the car and put his face in his hands. All tha crying was NOT helping his hangover. His head was pounding so bad he felt sick to his stomach. Roy sat in the car and looked at Ed. 'I know that look' Roy reached over and opened Ed's door. Like a chain reaction lead leaned out of the car and vomited a few times. Roy put his hand on Ed's Back. Ed jumped at the touch causing Roy to raise an eyebrow. After a few minutes Ed leaned back in and winced when he leaned back on the set. Quickly looking at Roy to make sure he didn't see. Roy was looking forward acting normal.

"You ok now?"

"Yeah."

"Care if we run to the store?"

"No"

"I need to get some variety of drinks for you and more food; I've seen how you eat."

"What are you trying to say?"

"That you're a freaking bottomless pit!" Roy started the car and took off.

"What do you like to drink?"

Ed sat in silence staring out of the window in deep thought. He never heard Roy.

Ed had been down and depressed before but he was pretty bad this time. It was really starting to worry Roy.

"Ed?"

"Huh?"

"Drinks? What do u like?"

"Anything that's not milk."

"Ok."

Ed looked back out the window as they passed a liquor store.

"It's going to be ok Ed."

"Yeah, that's what you keep saying Roy."

He turned took look at Roy, then sighed, "Uh.. How much is rent going to be?"

"Nothing."

"For now"

"Whatever."

"How is everyone? Riza, Havoc, and them?"

"Uh…well Hawkeye and Havoc married a few months ago. I guess you didn't read your Invitation. The others are the same as always. Sadly they're never going to grow up about the supernatural shit."

"Oh. Wait Jean and Riza!? What about You and her? You liked her. You never asked her out did you?"

"No it wouldn't have worked out. I could tell even though she had feelings for me it just wouldn't have lasted."

"Oh."

"Have you talked to the Rockbells lately?"

"Not that I remember."

"Ok."

"Uh..Do you care if winry comes up for awhile?"

"No why?"

"She needs to look at my auto mail."

"Can it wait a week?"

"Yeah I guess. Why?"

"I'm in the process of buying a new house."

"Oh why?"

"I got to get out of that damn apartment"

"I understand that"

They pulled into the store parking lot. Once Roy parked he turned to Ed.

"Can I take a look at your auto mail?"

"Sure"

Roy carefully looked it over. It was dented scratched, when he turned it over it clicked.

"That's why I need her to look at it."

"Can I take a closer look?"

"Yeah, but DON'T touch the wires."

Ed opened it using alchemy. After a few minutes Roy pulled a piece of glass out of it.

'Wait,' Ed thought and reached for it before Roy got a look at it. 'Holy shit is that blood?'

Ed felt a twinge in his flesh arm.

"I I didn't…."

He lifted the sleeve of his shirt up to reveal cuts, a lot of them.

"Shit" both said.

Ed's head was pounding for to many reasons hangover, crying, and seeing that. He felt dizzy and opened the car door and vomited again. Only once though he dry heaved twice. Before passing out.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Uh-oh Ed passed out what next what next??

Don't kill me!

REVIEWS! I LIVE OFF THEM! Lets see how's 5!


	5. Are You Ok?

5 REVIEWS LOVED THEM ALL!!!! SPECAIL THANKS TO **EdwardElricFan4Ever, VadMustang, awesomepersonlol **(anon), **InuEdbabe, megen.**

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Which is good for my sanity.

Chapter 5

"_Al?"_

"_Edward? Nurse Ed's come to!"_

Everything sounded so far away, "Roy? Where am I? Where's Al?"

Roy just looked at Ed His eyes still closed.

"Mr. Mustang please leave the room." Some woman said Ed couldn't recognize the voice.

"No." Ed argued.

"Mr. Elric? Open your eyes." This time a man.

"They are."

" No there not please try."

Ed obeyed it was so bright. Snapping them shut again. "Ow."

"Ok try again"

Ed opened his eyes and looked at they doctor. Funny looking man red curly hair. (looked like Ron from Harry potter only curly hair).

"Good Mr. Elric. Now are you in any pain?"

"My head and eyes."

"Neck?"

"It's fine."

"Ok Mr. Elric I-"

"Ed"

"Yes sir, Ed Waits the last thing you remember?"

"Falling out of the car."

"Ok good."

"That I fell out of the car? Damn what kind of doctor are you? Get these IV out of me. W-"

"Ed I can't do that yet. And no, not that you fell out of the car. It's good that you remember."

"Oh"

"Allergies? What are they?"

"None"

"Ok, I can't give you any medicine until your test results come in."

"Roy here?"

"Yes I will send him in."

With that said the doctor turn on his heel, "Name?"

"Oh sorry sir, Dr. Berrett"

'One hell of a name for a doctor'

Dr. Berrett left the room. Ed tried to sit up getting extremely dizzy and laying back down. His hand accidentally touched the side of the frame, the upper half of the bed raised.

"HA" he raised the bed up and started to mess with the IV in his hand when Roy walked in.

"Ed leave it in."

"It's freaking me out!"

"Don't think about it. How are you feeling?"

Ed just looked at Roy. "How long have I been here?"

"About an hour"

"It takes them that damn long to get results back. Lazy sons a bitches."

"Calm down"

"Well it's pathetic I me-"

"Ed relax. Can I ask you a few questions?"

"No"

"What happened to your arm?"

"My arm?"

"Forgotten?"

Ed looked at his arm. "Oh"

"…"

"You ever played the game where you take cigarettes and burn each other to see who's tougher or whatever?"

"Yea"

"We used glass instead"

"Damn it Ed you could have bleed to death look at how deep some of them are! And- wait earlier you acted like you thought they were self inflicted."

"I freaked cause I couldn't remember."

"Look me in the eyes and promise me your telling me the truth!"

"I promise Roy!" Ed looked him square in the eyes.

"Thank you. But Ed what if you pissed one of the guys off that did that? They would have killed you!"

"I know."

Roy sighed and sat down next to Edward, "I'm just thankful your ok. I'd hate to loose another friend."

"I'm fine Roy"

"Yea."

Ed sat up slowly and put his hand on Roy's shoulder, "I'm not leaving here anytime soon, I have to keep you pissed at all times, and marry beautiful woman and start a family. And grow old with my wife, and best friend"

"Now don't you dare think I'm depressed or whatever is going through that brain of yours"

"Sorry I won't be nice to you again." Ed plopped back against the bed, "Ow shit"

"What?" Roy turned.

"Uh…nothing…. hit my head. I'm ok now." Ed faked a smile and started making rude comments about how slow the doctors were and fidgeting with his IV.  
"Edward quit it!" Roy bit.

"I can't stand it,"

Stop it I'll see what I can do."

"…Gggrrr…"

Roy got up and walked up to the front desk of the infirmary. Roy flashed his famous womanizing smile, "Hey, sweetheart. Can you do me a favor?"

The woman blushed, "What would that be?"

"Can you please send Edward Elric's nurse in before he has a conniption?"

"Yes sir."

"Thank you."

Once back in Ed's room he was greeted with Ed got irate!

"WHERE THE HELL IS THAT DAMN DOCTOR? I WANT OUT OF HERE! IF HE WANTS TO KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME I TELL HIM! CONCUSSION! ALL I HAVE TO DO IS STAY IN BED. AND WAKE UP EVER HOUR OR TWO SO I DON'T GO INTO A COMA!"

"Damn Ed calm down."

"…. Gggrrr…"

The nurse walked in. "Mr. Elric sir-"

"EDWARD!!" Ed yelled

"Ed this is childish shut up!"

"…Gggrrr…"

"Edward I know it takes so long but please try and bear it."

"Speaking of which where is that damn doctor?" Ed snapped

"Edward shut up!"

"I'm sorry sir he can't come in now."

"Miss, I think he is mad because he needs to eat and has that IV and he has a problem with needles" Roy explained.

"Like hell I do! Get it out!"

"Can you remain calm for a few more minutes? I promise I will hurry/"

"What are you going to do?" Ed snapped.

Get permission to take your IV out."

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR? GO!"

"Yes sir." She ran out of the room to search for the doctor.

"Ed you need to control your temper."

"Trade you places."

"…"

About five minutes passed and the doctor came in and took the IV out.

"Ok Edward, we are keeping you over night just in case. Your results said it is a minor concussion."

"Ok. I'm Hungary."

"Yes Sir."

An hour passed and Ed was sound asleep.

Roy was sitting looking out the window feeling sleep coming to him. Roy knew it was going to be a long night with them waking Ed up. And Ed in this mood only Roy seemed able to calm him down.

'His true colors are showing. Witout Al around to keep him in line.' Roy thought.

He sighed and looked at Ed 'What am I going to do with you?'

Ed shifted in his sleep and winced. 'He keeps doing that. Every time something hits his back. What are you hiding now?'

Roy looked at the clock.11:50 PM. "they'll be in here in about 40 minutes."

Roy shifted in his chair and looked back outside and tried to sleep when Ed grunted he ignored it at first. Then they turned into one word.

Roy turned to Ed. He said it again only louder. He stood up and went beside Ed.

"Edward?" he whispered.

"ALPHONSE!" Ed yelled and trashed his arms hitting Roy on the jaw with his auto mail.

Roy regained his composer and ran for the door. Ed's night was something the nurses didn't need to know about. He closed the door and went to Ed on his left side this time.

"Edward! Wake up!"

He grabbed his auto mail arm and shook him.

"Ed please snap out of it."

He shook him again only harder and Ed jerked away in tears and latched himself around Roy's neck.

Roy pulled him into a supportive embrace. "Shh Ed it was just a nightmare."

It never helped. Roy kept repeating himself and telling Ed everything was ok. A good 15 minutes passed when Ed pulled away. Roy was relieved. He hated seeing Ed like that.

"You ok, Ed?"

"…"

"Ed?"

"Yeah"

"You ok?"

"I want to go home."

"Not yet. You have another good 10 hours left."

"Oh"

"My neck hurts."

"Buzz the nurse."

He did she looked him over and pulled Roy out of the room.

"Berrett said anytime after 1 AM he can go home but he is fine I think he can go know but every two hours at the most he has to wake up for a good while I'll have Berrett call you in the morning and tell you ok?"

"Alright I'm taking him home then ok?"

"I need him to sign a few papers just give me a minute."

Roy walked back in Ed was looking out the window.

"Ready to go?"

"Yeah, how'd I get out early?"

"You have a good nurse and doctor."

"oh"

Roy sighed and looked at him he wasn't himself. To quiet.

Ok I'll update ASAP!

My grandma is in the hospital very sick they staid she isn't going to make it. So please be patient with me. Thanks please review and the story has NOTHING to do with what is going on in my life.


	6. What Happened?

Ok guys, I'm not having to go to hospital everyday anymore so I'm going to continue writing. Thanks to **VadMustang, InuEdbabe, EdwardElricFan4ever!!**

I own nothing. Which is good for my sanity!

Chapter 6

"Ready to go?" Roy asked Ed.

"Huh…yeah" Ed had gotten dressed and was staring out the window while Roy signed the papers for him and talked to the nurse.

"You ok Ed?"

"Lets go."

Roy gave Ed a look of concern, "Ok"

"Stop looking at me like that."

"Sorry runt."

"Shut up." Ed didn't yell just stated it and walked out of the room.

Once back at Roy's apartment Ed raided the kitchen and sat down in the front room, wincing as he leaned back.

"What was that for?" Roy asked.

"What?" Ed asked stuffing a muffin down his throat.

"You wince every time you lean back and up jumped out of your skin when I touched your back."

"I'm just sore."

"Why?"

"I don't know, probably because I slept on the floor last night."

"You do every night."

"I DON"T KNOW ROY!"

"Really? Let see your back"

"No"

"Why not?"

"It's my body and I don't want you looking at it!"

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"It means no."

"…You little bastard let me see it!"

"Go to hell."

"ED"

"I said no." Ed turn away from Roy.

_Snap_

"WHAT THE – I'LL KILL YOU! STOP BURNING MY CLOTHS!"

"TELL ME ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR BACK!"

"Nothings wrong with it."

"Then turn around."

"No…"

"…."

"…Gggrrr…"

"Well?"

"Fight. That's all."

"You were in a fight and your back got cut to hell? How?"

"I don't remember much other than I was fighting with some ass in the bar and we took it outside and his buddies followed."

"And that's why you're going to stop drinking!"

"…"

"The doctor gave me this for your back. I have to get the scabs of and pour peroxide on them. And then this cream shit."

"No."

"Yes"

"They trust you to do that to me?"

"I suppose."

"Well I don't!"

"RUNT SHUT UP AND LET ME HELP YOU!"

"STOP CALLING ME A DAMN RUNT!"

"NO"

"..grr… I'm going to call the doctor just to make sure your not shitting me!"

"I'm not plus they'll want you back to see it themselves."

"DAMN YOU!"

"Why won't you let me take care of your back?"

"…"

"Well?"

"Ain't I enough of a burden?"

"What? I'm making you stay here."

"Yeah well.." Ed looked at the floor, "Fine."

Ed laid down on the couch and Roy looked at Ed's back. There are 4 huge cuts on his back going from about his shoulders to mid back. They are about 2 inches wide each.

"Well they are infected and I think I'll have to cut the scabs off."

"I hate you"

"You did it to yourself."

"Shut up"

"I'll be right back"

"Whatever General Shit!"

Roy came back with a several towels hot water and Ed's medication. He pulled the coffee table up next to Ed and sat down and started to sterilize the knife he was going to use to cut the scabs off.

Ed turned and looked at Roy, "Whoa hold up your not going to cut me with that."

"Uh...yes I am."  
""Your not a doctor!"

"You prefer me to call one?"

"No! But how do I know that you know what your doing?"

Roy blinked, "I've done this 3 times before."

"Prove it."

"I can only prove two."

"That's more than one so prove it."

Ed sat up as Roy took off his shirt.

"You did that to yourself!?"

"Yeah and another person."

"Oh, what's the story behind them?"

Roy pointed to his left side, "This one happened while I was in the war. I was abused; someone with a rushed blade got me. All I did to care for it was rinse it with some water a few times. A week later I couldn't move my left arm without wanting to drop to the floor. So I decided to play doctor, I cut the infection out. Nearly passed out a few times but it's fine now. Just another scar."

The scar wasn't too bad, but it was noticeable, it was a pretty big scar, going from about his shoulder blade to his hip.

Roy took a deep breath and looked out the window into darkness. It was getting close to 1 AM. "Is that good enough for you?"

Ed could tell he didn't want to talk about his other one, "Yeah."

"Lay back down then."

Roy put his shirt back on and sterilized the knife again Roy made the first cut, as it oozed blood Ed tensed. "Ed you have to relax. The cuts won't be right. Your tense when I cut it then when you relax the cut will stretch and rip."

Ed took a deep breath and relaxed. Ed never once made a sound while Roy cut at his back.

"You ok?"

"This is nothing compared to getting a auto mail installation."

"Good point."

Roy finished cutting and patted the blood off Ed's back then rolled up a few towels and sat them around Ed. And poured the peroxide in each cut. Ed tensed.

"Relax!"

"…Gggrrr…"

Ed relaxed and Roy patted off the peroxide when it was ready and rubbed the cream on Ed's back.

"You want me wrap you up?"

"I don't know doc you tell me!" Ed was now pissed he held it back long enough. All Ed wanted to do was sleep and enjoy not have that damn IV in his arm!

"Well I don't know what your damn bleeding habits and I don't really like the idea of buying the apartment a new couch!" Roy snapped he was getting his fill of Ed's attitude for the night.

"Then wrap me up I don't give a shit!"  
"WOULD YOU COOL IT?!"

"NO!" Ed Jumped up, fists clenched.

"Sit down before you start bleeding again." Roy cooled himself down.

"No! I think I might go for a nice long run like this!"

"Ed please calm down."

"Why?"

"….Because your going to start bleeding and it was hard enough to stop the first time. Sit down, I'll wrap you up and you can go to bed or eat, read I don't care as long as you don't drink."

"Whatever." Ed turned so Roy could wrap him up.  
"Damn it Ed."

"What the hell did I do now?"

"You're bleeding."

"Then wrap me up stupid it'll stop!"

Roy sighed but obeyed Edward. He quickly wrapped him up, Roy felt like an expert at that. Once he finished Ed plopped down on couch and sighed.

"Now my back hurts worse you ass."

"Shut up."

"I'm hungry."

"Why are you telling me this?" Roy was cleaning up everything a little agitated that Ed wasn't helping.

"It's you damn place."

"You living here aren't you?"

"Yeah, but it'd be a little rude to just take food."

Roy snapped his head right around at that. "A LITTLE RUDE TO TAKE MY FOOD? BUT IT'S PEERFECTLY FINE TO YELL AND SNAP AT ME FOR HELPING YOU?"

Ed just blinked at Roy, then headed for the kitchen.

"…gggrrr…" Roy growled.

Roy finished cleaning up and sat in the chair by the window and started out it.

"Here."

"Huh?"

"Take it." Ed handed Roy a sandwich.

"Oh thanks?"

"Yeah"

Ed sat back on the couch and eats his sandwich. When he finished he looked at Roy, "Sorry about my attitude."

"I should apologize, I knew you would get moody because of the lack of alcohol. I shouldn't have snapped."

"It's fine I would have too."

"Heh."

"And I'm sorry about earlier."

Roy raised a brow. "Don't be." With that said Roy stood before Ed could say anything more, "Good night Edward."

Ed blinked, "ok 'night."

It was nearing 5 AM when Roy woke up. He couldn't understand why he woke up, ignoring it he rolled over and went back to sleep.

Ed was tossing and turning on the couch.

"_Come on Al nothings going to happen."_

"_Brother I don't think we should go in here lets try another one."_

"_Why? I like this bar."_

"_It's just a feeling I have."_

"_It's probably nothing. Lets go!" Ed grabbed Al's arm and half dragged Al in the bar. Ed and Al both loved it that Al had his body back and was good and healthy._

_Ed sat down on a bar stool, Al sitting next to him._

_What do you want Al?"_

"_Nothing brother."_

"_Ah come on!"_

"_No I'll just drag you home." Al smiled._

"_If your sure."_

"_Yes."_

"_Ok."_

_The bartender walked up. "What'll it be?"_

"_Something light to start with Ed said._

_Al glanced to his left as some man sat by him. _

"_Whiskey!" Ed told the bartender. She sat a bottle down for him and he took a drink._

"_Ed this man is starting to worry me." Al whispered._

"_Ignore it bro!"_

"_Hey little man what are you doing in here." The man said elbowing Al in the side. _

"_Ow" Al whispered under his breath. But Ed heard it._

"_Hey back up. Leave him alone he didn't do anything to you."_

"_Brother."_

"_What was that shorty?"_

_Ed's eye twitched, "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING SHORT? YOU DRUNKEN BAST-" Ed was silenced by the sound of a gun shot and Al standing in front of him._

"_Al?"_

_Al fell to floor. And the bartender screamed then reached for the phone._

"_ALPHONSE! Al? Nonononononononononono! Wake up Al! ALPHONSE!_

_He turned Al over his eyes were still opened._

"_Al. Brother wake up please." Al's eyes started to darken and become cloudy._

"_No no no no ALPHONSE!"_

"_Ed?" it wasn't Al's voice._

"_Wake up Ed."_

"_No Alphonse wake up please."_

Roy shook Ed awake. Ed woke Roy up by screaming and thrashing and hitting the nearby table.

Ed opened his eyes

"ALPHONSE!"

Roy just looked at Ed. He couldn't bring himself to say anything. Ed just blinked and looked at Roy as his expression went for worried and scared to deeply depressed. He sat up on the couch and Roy sat beside him.

"Alphonse" Ed whispered and put his face in his hands and started crying.

Roy put a supportive arm over Ed's shoulders.

"It was just a nightmare Ed."

"They seem so real."

"It's ok."

"Not really."

Ed calmed down after a few minutes and Roy leaned back removing his arm for Ed.

"You want to explain it to me?"

"No"

"It helps Ed trust me. It's hard to do but it'll help."

Ed just looked at Roy, "I miss him so much."

Al right I'm getting back into the swing of this things didn't happen like I thought it would so I'm back to writing like I was before. I want 3 review! THANKS FOR READN


	7. I'm Sorry

Ok I'd like to thank my 4 wonderful reviewers! **VadMustang, InuEdbabe, EdwardElricFan4Ever, and Night Alchemist! **Also ""what's being said '' what is being thought

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Chapter 7

"I miss him so much." Ed repeated this time just barely a whisper.

Roy looked at Ed. "I know everyone misses Al he was a dear friend to every one. Why don't you tell me about these nightmares you've been having?"

"It hurts."

"And that's normal, but the more you talk about them the less it hurts."

"I know."

"…Well?"

Ed took a deep breath and look at table in front of him. He explained everything to Roy. Roy listened to every word absorbing everything. Once Ed finished Roy had to say what was on his mind.

"Ed does you think Al is proud of his big brother that goes off and drinks to forget about what happened?"

"No."

"I'm sorry but I don't know how else to tell you that, you need to live for him and yourself. Alphonse would want you to enjoy your life to the fullest."

"I know."

"So in order to actually enjoy life and make memories for yourself you should stop drinking."

"I know Roy! Ok damn it!"

"Now don't get all worked up. I'm just telling you what you need to hear."

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize to me." And with that said Roy stood and went back to bed, "'Night Ed" Roy said he closed the door behind him.

Ed blinked, "Don't apologize to me." Ed mocked as he lay down. He cried somewhat silently in his pillow.

The phone ringing at eight o'clock in the morning awaked Ed.

"Hello, mustang's damn house." Ed snapped groggily.

"Mr.Elric?"

"Ed. Berrett what the hell is you calling here for?"

"I was told you left and need to call Mr. Mustang."

"Hold on I wake General Shit up for you."

Ed sat down the phone and walked into Roy's room. He was sleeping sound.

"Roy" Nothing. "Mustang" Ed poked his shoulder. "Bastard wake up!" He shook his shoulder. " Damn bastard," Ed mumbled and looked around. He picked out a book a slammed it over Roy's head. That woke him. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!?"

"Phone's for you."

"SO YOU HIT ME WITH A BOOK!?"

"GO TALK TO THAT DAMN DOCTOR!"

Roy got up and left Ed in the room. Ed stretched and yawned. He could hear Mustang talking in the front room. 'Loud bastard.' Ed looked at Roy's bed and lay down. He was so tired. Falling asleep instantly when his head hit the pillow.

"You cut the scabs off and the infection out?"

"Yes Berrett."

"I knew he was in good hands. Sorry I called so early Roy."

"It's fine with me. Though I did get cracked over head with a hardback book."

"He has a temper. Any way rub that cream one his back once to twice a day, I'll trust yours and his judgment. But no less than once and no more than 3."

"Ok and about his concussion?"

"I'm not worried about that. It wasn't a threat at all."

"Ok I'm going to go give him a piece of my mind."

"Take care."

Roy hung up and went into his room only to find Ed sleeping in his bed.

Roy sighed and went to start breakfast.

Once he finished he decided to wake Ed.

Walking into his room, "EDWARD ELRIC!" Roy yelled.

Ed jerked awake and fell off the bed.

"DAMN YOU BARTARD WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

"Your food is done."

"Damn you Roy you could have killed me. Bastard General with a God complex!"

Roy just laughed and walked out of the room.

After Ed ate he took a shower and let Roy care for his back.

"You want to go with me when I pay for the house?"

"Sure"

"You ok ed?"

"Yeah why?"

"You just got quiet."

"I was thinking that's all."

"Well that can't be good." Roy smiled.

"Shut up"

"What about?"

"Different things really. Mainly about a job."

"Forget about that for awhile. I know your not one to sit around and do nothing but-"

"I'm thinking of going back to being the Fullmetal Alchemist. Think they let me?"

Roy blinked a few times. "Why you want to go back to being a 'lap dog' as you said?"

"It's what Al would have wanted."

"Oh. Well you have to do all that testing again. Though with your reputation of being an alcoholic you might not get in."

"I know. Better the reason to quit huh?"

Roy smiled, "Yeah I guess your right."

'What I said actually got through to him last night.' Roy was a little proud of himself.

"So when going to the new house?"

"I thought we could leave in about fifteen minutes."

"Ok" Ed got up and went into the kitchen and poked around for a few minutes, only to return to the living room with plenty of food. Junk food.

"Ed don't eat me out of house and home."

"I'm hungry."

"You just ate!"

"So?"

"How can you possibly be hungry again?"

"I don't know"

"You had a good three plates and then you made yourself two sandwiches and devoured them."

Ed smiled, "I haven't eat a actual meal in a very long time. I mean you can see my ribs and every other bone in my body. I actually surprised you haven't chewed me out yet."

"I almost did last night but we were both in a piss ass mood."

"Yeah"

Ed then began to shovel food down his throat. Roy shook his head and opened up a book and read a few pages.

Once Ed finished making a pig of himself they left to pay for and look at the house. It was a good 10 minutes from HQ but that didn't matter to Roy he wasn't in a little one room apartment.

After Roy paid the pervious owners, they looked around the house. It wasn't much a three bedroom and two bath. Roy had already but when he did he wasn't expecting to have some one living with him.

They walked around chose their rooms, Roy was thankful Ed didn't want the one he did. Though when it came to choosing the bathrooms they wanted the same one. They started arguing over the master bath. It was the biggest and had a separate bathtub and shower, and of course a toilet and sink. The other bathroom was a half bath. Only had a toilet, sink, and stand in shower.

"You should get the half bath because you're a half pint!"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING SHORT!! And by the way smart-ass I'm not that much shorter than you, General Shit!! How about we share it? I mean its not like it's connected to your room!"

"Fine by me shorty!"

"Whatever!"

After another ten minutes of looking around Ed decided that he liked the house much better than any apartment. "Lets go!" Ed headed toward the front door when he realized an open door way. 'Dumbass left that door opened." Ed walked over to close the door and realized he hadn't looked around this room and that there wasn't a door. He flipped a switch only to see that it was a basement. He quickly turned off the light and headed toward the door.

"You like the house?"

"Huh oh yeah. Can't wait to move in." Ed said kind of fast.

"Was there any thing you didn't like or saw wrong with it?"

"Um...could we get a door to the basement?"

Roy blinked a few times, "I guess but why?"

"Heh..well..No reason…when are we packing your shi up to move in?"

"I thought we could start packing tomorrow, because I have to be back to work in a few days." Roy said as they got in the car. 'He avoided the subject of why he wanted a door on the basement entrance. I'll have to ask him later.'

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Ok if anyone has ideas fell free to tell me!! I want 4 reviews! I know you can do it!!


	8. Small Problems

Thanks To **EdwardElricFan4Ever, megen, VadMustang, and WhiteWolfKitsune. **Not in order.

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Chapter 8

Roy woke up at 6 am. Wide-awake, He couldn't figure out why. The only thing that came to mind was Ed having a nightmare. He hurried to the front room. Ed was lying on his back sleeping sound, he didn't look troubled. Roy sighed in relief and went back to bed. 'Why the hell did I wake up?' He thought as he lay back down. After 30 minutes he got up again and went to the kitchen. Ed was still sleeping. Roy silently made a sandwich and ate it. 'Damn it all! I want to sleep!' But he was wide-awake. 'I'll read.' He got up and walked passed the sleeping Elric and grabbed his book and headed back to his room only to be stopped.

_THUMP! _

Roy turned only to see Ed laying flat on his face on the floor.

"Son of a bitch. What happened?" Ed said still half asleep. Roy laughed.

"You fell off the couch pipsqueak."

"Bastard that should be against the law, insulting a man that's half asleep and just fell." Ed mumbled as he tried to stand. He fell again. "Shit!" He was more awake now.

"What happened know?"

"OW SHIT SON OF A BITCH!"

"Edward? What's Wrong?"

"Turn the damn light on!"

Roy did and went to see what was wrong with Ed.

"Ow! I can fix it."

The knee dislocated. And was stretching the wires loose.

"Any way I can help?"

"Uh.yeah hold my leg in place."

Roy hurried over and held Ed's leg as he asked. He watched Ed mess around with a wire and transmute a few wire back to there ordinal state. Some had ripped or broke in half.

"Ok move." Ed ordered. Ed took hold of his own leg as Roy backed up. Ed pulled the joint together and, with his automail hand hit the side of his leg as hard as he could, popping it back in place.

"There good as new."

"You act like you have done that many times before.'

"I have."

"…"

"What?!"

"What the hell did you do to your leg?"

"Nothing."

"Damn it Ed! Why do you keep hiding these things?"

"I don't know!"

"Then what happened?"

Ed stood up and walked around the front room making sure it was going to hold. Then sat on the couch. He could feel Roy glaring at him.

"WHAT?!"

"What happened to your damn leg!?"

"I DON"T KNOW ROY! DAMMIT! I DON"T KNOW!! I WAS DRUNK AND WOKE UP WITH IT DISLOCATED OK? ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Truthfully, I forgot."

Roy blinked, "You forgot? How long ago did it happen?"

"I don't know. Probably 2 months ago."

"Shit Ed."

"Shut up."

"As soon as we get moved into the new house your calling Winry."

"I planed on it anyway."

"I'll let her kick your ass this time."

"Gee Thanks."

Roy went back to his room with his book and Ed lay down. 'Bastard General' With that last thought he was asleep again. Roy on the other hand read until eight o'clock.

Roy sighed and went to take a shower. After that he started digging around for boxes and decided Ed needed to get his lazy ass out of bed.

He walked over beside the couch. Ed has face buried in the back of the couch. Roy reached down and grabbed the bottom of the couch and flipped it over.

Roy laughed to whole time Ed cursed him and tried to get up.

"You're a bastard!"

"Help me pack."

"WHY THE HELL SHOULD I AFTER PULLING A STUNT LIKE THAT!?"

"I was only looking for a laugh don't get your little panties up in a bunch."

"Shut up!"

Roy laughed. "How's you back?"

"Probably broken."

"I meant the gashes not you spine."

"Heartless!"

"Well?"

"They need to be looked at. Sadly you will have to do that AFTER I get out of the shower."

"Lets me see them before you get in the shower."

"Gggrrr" Ed headed toward the kitchen. Roy sighed and sat down. Ed came back with an armful of junk food, and threw it all on the couch then turned back to the kitchen.

"What the hell do you think your doing?"  
"Getting more to eat"

"What no eat something healthy."

"Why?"

" Note the word 'healthy'."

"Well um…hmm…"

Ed dug around in the kitchen and came back in and looked at Roy. "The only healthy foods you have I'd have to cook."

"…So?"

"I ain't cooking."

"Then you aren't eating."

"Gggrrr. What should I cook?"

"Whatever you want."

"You do know I can't cook worth shit."

"Then I'll teach you."

"Son of bitch."

"What do you plan on cooking?"

"Nothing."

"But I'm hungry."

"Go cook it yourself."

"No."

"Well I'm not cooking."

"And your not going to eat all that shit for breakfast launch and dinner."

"Fine I'll eat it for breakfast."

"No you won't."

"You can't stop me." Ed turned to the couch to clear a spot to sit.

_Snap!_

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR?"

"Because like I said you're not eating all that."

"SO YOU BURN IT?"

"Why not?"

"YOU WAISTED IT!"

"So?"

"Gggrrr why can't I eat that? I need to gain weight."

"You need nutrition and that will help you gain the weight you need."

"Yeah well nutrition doesn't taste good."

"You can be so childish sometimes."

"I'm not a child!"

"I didn't say you were I said you act like one."

"I'm going to take a shower."

"Let me see your back."

"Why? It will look the same after the shower."

"Not true. It will look cleaner."

"Damn bastard! You always think your right."

Ed let Roy look over his back.

"It's starting to heal nicely."

"Good I'm getting in the shower."

After Ed got out of the shower and Roy put more cream on his back, they packed everything up and took it all to the new house. After the last box was brought in it was nearing 7 pm.

"Go timing if you ask me." Ed stated.

"I'm starving."

"Lets go get something to eat."

"No I want to at least start unpacking a little to night. Order something." Roy said as he pointed to the phone.

Ed went to the phone and orders them both something. (A/N: They can eat whatever you want them to)

"Call Winry."

"That can wait."

"No it can't not after what happened this morning! Call her or I will!"

"Ok ok. God you're a bastard fine I will."

Ed picked up the phone and dialed the Rockbells number.

"_Hello Rockbell Automail. This is Winry."_

"Hey it's Ed."

"_Ed? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! WHY HAVN'T YOU CALLED…"_

Ed pulled the phone away from his ear and let her finish her rant.

"You finished?"

"_Yes. Why haven't you called? I haven't talked to you since Al's funeral."_

"Sorry Winry. I was wondering if you could come down to Central soon."

"_Why?"_

"Heh Heh…well you see my automail really needs work."

"_WHAT? Your not due for a tune up for another few months what did you do to it?"_

"Them."

"_WHAT?"_

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Ok don't kill me for ending in the middle of their conversation. 4 reviews please and thank you!


	9. Attitude

Ok I'd like to thank **Broken-wings Angel, VadMustang, EdwardElricFan4Ever, and megen.**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Chapter 9

"EDWARD WHAT DID YOU DO? BOTH OF THEM??" Winry yelled.

"Yes Winry both. And as for what happened…it's a long story." Ed said.

"Well Your going to tell me everything in three days!"

"Glad you could make it."

"You still living in that old apartment?"

"No."

"Ok where you living now?"

"Not with your favorite person-"

"WAIT! You're living with someone!?"

"Yeah. What's wrong with that?" Ed snapped, he was slowly become very angry.

"Nothing, sorry you don't have to get mad. So since your not living in the same place-"

"Yes Winry! I will pick you up!"

"What the hell is your problem Ed?"

"Nothing!" Ed snapped.

"Ok sorry. So what's wrong with everything?"

"The leg is the worst one. It keeps dislocating itself."

"WHAT?!"

"YOU HEARD ME!"

"DAMN IT ED WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT!?"

"NOTHING! I'LL SEE YOU IN THREE DAYS!" He slammed the phone down.

"That sounded wonderful." Roy said.

"SHUT UP YOU DAMN BASTARD!"

"What the hell is your problem Ed?"

"That's funny Winry asked me the same damn question."

"And the answer to that question is?"

"NOTHING!!"

"BULLSHIT!"

"What do you care?"

"I'm your best friend"

"So?"

"What is with this attitude you've been having lately?" Though Roy new exactly what was wrong.

"I don't know!"

"Learn to control your temper."

After another ten minutes of fighting their food came in. They ate in silence the Ed found a pillow, sheets, and blanket and headed towards his room.

Roy headed to his own room soon after.

Ed lay in his bed for hours. 'Damn bastard dumped out all his liquor before we left.'

Ed sighed and rolled on his side. 'Asshole thinks he can help.' Ed dozed off for about ten minutes, which completely pissed Ed off. He jumped up and flung open his door letting it hit the wall loudly. And went into the bathroom slamming that door behind him. When he came out he treated it the same way he treated his bedroom door.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?" Mustang yelled as he came out of his bedroom.

"I WENT AND TOOK A PISS IF YOU MUST KNOW!"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I'MEANT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING SLAMMING DOORS AT 4 AM?"

Ed just stood there and glared at Roy before turning and walking into his room and slammed the door as loud as he could.

_Crack!_

"DAMN IT ED WE HAVEN'T BEEN IN THIS DAMN HOUSE TWENTY-FOUR HOURS AND YOU ALREADY BROKE THE DOOR!"

Ed lies on the bed, face in a pillow and sighed. 'Good'

"God Ed you broke it in half"

"…"

"It's a good thing the neighbors a bit of a distance away."

"…"

"Ed why'd you go on a rampage? At four in the morning at that?"

"I don't know? Leave me alone I'll fix the goddamn door."

They were silent for a moment when Ed sat up and looked at Roy.

"Why are you still in here?!"

"Because I want you to tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing! How about I make a tape and you can play it back all you want!"

"…"

"Go away."

"Not until you tell me why you have had this attitude tonight."

"You want the truth, I don't know I'm pissed at the world and everyone in it!"

"Good enough for me."

"Now leave"

"Gladly"

Roy went back to his room and sat on the bed. He heard Ed fix the door with alchemy then slam it shut again. 'Little bastard' Roy thought. 'Ok his use to drink alone, he can't control how much he drinks, can't remember shit, he use to deny he had a drinking problem, had alcohol hiding in his apartment, and now he is irritable. He has fallen victim to alcoholism.' He thought it all out then put his head in his hands. Roy sighed and lay down, 'If he starts shaking, sweating, or is nauseous that will defiantly prove it.' Roy fell asleep soon after, only to wake up at six. He got up and looked in on Ed. He was sleeping. Roy new he wasn't waking up anytime soon. So he got dressed and drove to town to order them both some breakfast. He was on his out of the restaurant with two to-go bags.

"What you doing out and about at this time, sir?" a male voice sounded.

"Havoc, morning." Roy really didn't want to stand around and talk like he usually would, he didn't want to leave Ed alone for another day. He had even considered taking him to HQ tomorrow.

"Hungry sir?"

"I've told you before you can call me Roy out side of work."

"Sorry si- Roy."

"Jean my apologies but I've got to go."

Jean gave him a confused look; 'The Gerenal is out this early on a day off and not standing around talking, unlike him.' Jean thought. Ever since Hughes died Roy and Jean became closer friends. "What's going on Roy?"

"Huh?"

"Why the rush?"

"An friend of mine is at the house."

"Friend? Who? House?"

"Again with the questions. Yes friend, and yes house. If you don't remember I took the week off to get moved in. Well actually it only to 2 days to get moved in."

Jean laugh, "Sounds like you boss. Where you living at?"

"Down the road a ways." Roy pointed. "Jean I've got to go sorry."

"Care if I drop by sometime?"

Roy sighed, "Follow me"

"No I can wait until your good and moved in. Then I can bring some drinks"

"NO!"

"Sorry Roy I-"

"No no it's fine I didn't mean it to sound like that. Um…follow me home."

"Ok"

They got in their cars and left.

Once they got to Roy's Jean got out of his car.

"Nice house, kind of far from HQ though."

"I don't care about that I wanted out of the damn apartment."

Roy walked in and looked around no sign of Ed. "Have you eat Jean?"

"Yep just finished when I spotted you."

"Ok, can you wait here for a minute?"

"Yeah sure." Jean was slightly confused and was wondering were Roy's friend was. Jean knew for a fact his friend wasn't a girlfriend, he always said girlfriend.

Roy walked into Ed's room. Ed was still asleep, and Roy was slightly afraid to wake him.

"Ed?"

"Mmm…"

"Edward?" Roy put his hand on Ed's shoulder.

"What?"

"Hey you need to get up, Havoc is here and I bought you something to eat."

"Havoc?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"He wanted to see the place."

"What time is it?"

"About 7:15"

"I'm going back to sleep tell him I said hi."

"Ed get up. He doesn't even know you're here you can take a nap later."

Ed groaned and got up. Roy left to the kitchen will Ed did his business in the bathroom.

"Sit down Jean." Roy pointed to the small table in the kitchen. It had three chairs. The two sat down when Roy heard Ed walking down the hall.

"Do you care if we eat Jean?" Roy asked.

"Go for it" Jean smiled.

"Morning guys," Ed said as he sat down.

Jean blinked several times, he couldn't believe his eyes Edward Elric in Roy's house, no one had seen him since Al's funeral, "Hey there chief! How you been?"

"Ed here hasn't been so good" Roy answered for him causing Ed to glare.

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Ok guys school is starting for me tomorrow! Sadly my updates are going to slow down. BUT FEAR NOT! I WILL update as much as possible. And only if I get reviews!!


	10. Red Wine

I'd like to thank the two whom left me reviews, **VadMustang, Vixyfox, and EdwardElricFan4Ever.**

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Chapter 10

"He hasn't been to good? What does he mean Ed?" Jean asked.

"Nothing, don't listen to that lying bastard. I'm fine never felt better." Ed quickly stated.

"…Really, Ed?" Roy asked.

"Yes."

Jean sat there confused. "Ed you look a little pale, and thin. What's been going on with you?"

"I already said nothing."

"He's been-"

"Nothing!"

Roy looked over at Ed. "ed why don't you tell Jean about your nightly adventures."

Jean blinked a few times and looked at Ed.

"I've been drinking."

"… You've got to be shitting me! The once famous Fullmetal Alchemist is going partying?"

"No he has been drinking in secret."

"Wait what?"

Ed just sat there and listened.

"Secretly yes, also he couldn't and probably still can't control how much he drinks, he can't remember shit, also use to deny that he has a drinking problem."

"Holy shit."

"There's more, he had alcohol hidden, and now he is more pissy than a pregnant woman."

"Ed what the hell possessed you to get that bad?"

"…"

"Ed?" Jean asked.

"WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW?" Ed yelled as he jumped up and left the room.

Roy rubbed his face, "See what I mean?"

"Damn did you get yourself in over your head."

"I'll help him. I'm going to get him through this."

"All he needs is a good friend and a lot of guidance."

"Yeah, Winry is coming up in a few days, I'm hoping she can help a little while she is here."

After Ed slammed the door he walked over to his bed and sat. He sat and listened to the two men in the other room talk, he couldn't make out what they were saying.

"Damn bastard."

He looked at his glass of water.

"..hhmm"

Ed clapped his hands and touched the glass and watched it turn blood red. Ed took a sip, "Heh heh red wine."

"What was that?" Jean asked.

"Sounded like Alchemy, but what would Ed be transmutating?"

"I don't know."

"I don't have to go of a feeling about this." Roy stood and headed for Eds room Jean following.

Roy reached out and opened the door and looked at Ed who was sitting on the bed.

"What do you want?"

"Did you just do alchemy?"

"Yeah. Why? What's it to you?" Ed asked.

"What did you do alchemy on Ed?" Jean asked and Roy glared and smelt the air.

"My knee it popped out again."

Roy turned his head and looked under the bed. Ed moved his automail blocking Roy's view.

"Ok?" Jean said suddenly feeling the tension between Ed and Roy.

"Hey Roy? Can I smoke in the house?" Jean asked.

"Sure. Ed can you make him a ashtray?"

"Well, what I'm I suppose to make it out of?"

"It's ok I'll go outside.'

Roy gave Jean a look saying to play along.

"oh..um…"

"Well?" Ed asked impatiently.

" Go outside and make one out of mud or something."

"Ok…I will in a minute."

"No now!"

Ed looked at Roy then Havoc, then to the floor where his boots lay. He got down on his hands and knees and pushed his glass of wine he hid under the bed further back.

Ed left the room hoping Roy hadn't caught on. He went outside and quickly made Havoc his ashtray. When he came back in the house Havoc and Roy both were glaring at him. Ed glared back at them, "What?"

"What's that?" Roy pointed at the glass of wine that was now in the front room.

"I don't know?"

Roy picked it up and smelt it, "Red wine." He took a sip, "Most defiantly." He handed it to Jean who did the same and agreed.

"Heh heh wine is go for you in small amounts." Ed argued.

"Ed don't start this up," Havoc said.

"Stay out of this!" Ed snapped.

"HEY! You shut your damn mouth! Since you proved to me today that I can't trust you when you're by yourself, you are going to HQ with me tomorrow!" Roy yelled.

"WHAT?!"

School is making it hard for me to update but I want 4 count them FOUR reviews or I won't update!! After I get 4 I'll update ASAP!!!


	11. You're Ok Ed

Ok people I'm trying to get these out as fast as I possibly can. School is making it hard to do. Thank you my lovely reviewers! **Bec, MissCoffeeBean, EdwardElricFan4Ever, radcat38.**

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Chapter 11

"Why do I have to go to work with you tomorrow?" Ed said, claming himself down before Roy blew up again.

"Because I can't trust you here by yourself."

"All your going to do tomorrow is tell everyone one you possibly can about my problem!"

"No."

"Ed trust in Roy he only wants to help."

Ed glared at Havoc and was about to snap at him when the phone rang and Mustang answered.

"Mustang"

"_Sir is Ed there?"_

"Err…I don't think you really want to talk to him right now."

"_Why what's wrong?"  
_"Give me the damned phone!" Ed said slapping the phone out of Roy's hand.

"Hello?"

"_Hey Ed I'm going to be early!"_

"…Huh?"

"_What do you mean 'huh?' I'll be at the station at 6 tonight." Winry stated._

"How?"

"Someone thought I couldn't fix their car and they said they would give it to me if I could…it made it 4 hours away from central and the next train won't be a while."

"Ok whatever see you –"

"Edward let me talk to Winry." Roy cut him off.

Ed handed the phone to Roy and walked off.

"Winry we need to talk."

"…Umm…what about sir?"

"Ed."

"_What's wrong with Ed?"_ she asked.

"He has a horrible drinking problem."

"_WHAT?"_

Roy explained everything he could to Winry. Ed's temper everything. Havoc stood outside Ed's room like Roy ordered him. After a while Roy walked towards Jean.

"Anything?"

"No I think he is asleep. Only thing I ever heard from him was something about how much he hated you then he got quiet and I think he was crying, but I didn't want to go in and piss him off."

"I understand." Roy smiled.

"Sorry Roy but I'm going to head out before Riza shoots me."

"Alright be careful Jean!" Roy laugh as Havoc showed himself out of the house.

Roy sighed and opened Ed's bedroom door. "Ed?" He said, looking at the small ball under the covers. "Edward."

"What?" Ed voice cracked.

Roy walked over and sat next to Ed. "What's wrong?"

"You!"

"Ed I'm only doing this to help you-"

"I don't care why your doing it I want you to stop!"

"Stop what? All I doing is saving you from yourself!"

Ed was sitting up now, glared at Roy. Roy wanted to slap Ed clear into the next country.

"Ed you can die from drinking to much! It screws up your brain; practically melts it away. It blocks your liver. I could go on for hours! Damn it Ed it can stop your heart!"

"Ed just sat there, he couldn't bring himself to look at Roy.

"Did you hear a word I just said?"

"Yes, but why do you have to tell everyone?"

"Ed have you looked in the mirror? You pale and so skinny you look so unhealthy. And they are people that deeply care for you! The have the right to now."

"Then why does everyone have to yell?"

"Because they care, Edward. Everybody has been so worried about you."

"..Really?"

"Yes Ed! Really!"

"Why? Because you're a good caring person."

"I'm….not any more…." Ed dropped his head so his bangs were covering his eyes.

"Yes you are. Don't cry Ed. You're going to make it though this."

"I'm not."

Roy out his arm around his friend to show support, "Yes you are."

Ed immediately turns to Roy and buried his head in Roy's chest and bawled like a baby.

"Your ok Ed." Roy calmed the attention-deprived child; to Roy Ed would always be a teenager.

"EDWARD!!!" Winery screamed and attached herself around his neck.

"Well hello to you to Win." Ed said returning the hug slightly. Roy laughed at the display in front of him. They all three headed to Roy's as Ed showed her around and Roy made dinner. Thankful that Ed recovered quickly from his moment, so Roy could go shopping for food. After dinner all hell broke loose Winry looked at Ed's automail and yelled and screamed at him for a good 10 minutes and Ed fighting back full throttle!

"WOULD YOU TWO SHUT THE HELL UP!"? Roy yelled as he had his fill for the night.

Ed winced, "Sorry Roy."

"Sorry Sir."

"Now Winry what are you going to have to do about His automail?"

"He needs all new. He has destroyed them and outgrown them."

Ed smiled when he heard 'outgrown.'

"HEAR THE BASTARD!!! OUTGROWN!"

Roy simply laughed and patted Ed's head, "Now I hate to break it to you Ed but I have to take care of your back."

"Ok and then I'm head to bed."

"I'm out guys goodnight." Winry said leaving the room.

OK I'm holding a small contest! Should Ed and Roy remain friend or should they accept each other as Father and Son?

I know Ed is 21 but he is severely lacking human contact and support thus Roy is being over protective of his friend!

Reviews! LOTS OF THEM!!!!!!


	12. Automail

Chapter 12

Roy jerked awake at 3 A.M. He looked around he was confused he knew something had to wake him up. He couldn't remember dreaming. Getting out of bed to go to the bathroom he heard a small crash coming from Winry's room. 'Great wake up the neighborhood!' Roy thought and continued to the restroom. He reached out for the doorknob when the door flew back he was greeted by a pissy blond.

"Sorry." Ed said as he walked off towards Winry's room. Roy just blinked, "the whole damn house is up at 3 A.M." Roy said to himself, not pleased.

"WINRY! GIVE IT A REST! IT'S THREE IN THE MORNING!!!" Ed yelled. Roy turned and went to see what was going on.

"I'm sorry I was just trying to get it finished soon. I know the leg is actually hurting you."

"My leg is fine!"

"No, Have you looked at the inside of it?"

"Not really it's working fine other than the fact it pops out of place."

Winry looked past ed to see Roy standing in the door way. Sighing she put down her tools and bent down to pick up the leg she had already finished. "Look at the base where the wires are." Winry said holding it up for both to see.

"Yeah so?" Ed asked.

"Sit down" Ed did as he was told.

"Take off your pants."

"What are you trying to prove?" Ed asked obey.

"That your in worse condition than you think."

"I'm fine!" Ed said, now sitting in a wooden chair in his boxers and a t-shirt.

"Brace yourself." Winry said as she reached for his leg to detach it from the port.

"WHAT NO!! NO! NO! NO! You are NOT taking it off!! You NOW I want them at the same time not separately!" Ed Yelled jumping up. Roy stepped in the room.

"Edward let her change it." Roy stated.

"WHAT?! NO! NOT YET!!"

"I SAID LET HER CHANGE IT!" Roy yelled.

Ed winced, "No!"

Roy looked at Winry then smirked, "Come on shorty, can't do us this little favor?"

Ed had it he launched at Roy, but was interrupted when his face hit the floor and a sharp pain ran up from the port of his automail to his neck.

"AH! SON OF A BITCH!"

"Edward!" Winry said.

"That's How it's been dislocating." Roy said as he walked over and held Ed's leg in place like he had before. Ed worked with the wire and was failing at getting them together. "It didn't take you this long last time."

"Shutup!" Ed ran his words together.

With his flesh hand he tried to pick up on of the wires when Roy saw his problem.

"Ed stop lay down, Winry get the leg off him now."

"Damn it Roy I'm fine." Ed snapped.

"Ed please lay down." Roy said pushing Ed's chest. Ed laid down.

"what wrong with him?" Winry asked as she bent down on the floor to take off the automail.

Roy moved over beside Ed and looked him in the eyes." You ok?"

"No"

"Ok tell me what's wrong."

I think I'm going to be sick. I'm cold."

"But-" Winry started.

"Get his leg off NOW!" Roy yelled.

Winry worked fast and took the leg off. Ed gritted his teeth as she pulled it off. Then sigh and relaxed as the pain subsided.

"Ed?" Roy asked.

"Huh?"

"Feel better?"

"The pain left that's all."

"Damn it." Roy picked Ed up and carried the broken Elric to the cough in the front room.

"Winry go get his pillow and blanket."

"Ok"

"Your cold?"

"Yes. And sick to my stomach, headache."

"Your sweating. Damn it." Roy put his hand on Ed's forehead. 'He burning up."

"Here Roy." Winry handed him Ed's pillow and blanket. When Roy turned around Ed was sitting up staring at the floor.

"Winry why don't u go to bed or something I'll talk to you later ok?"

"Um…ok"

With that she was gone and Roy sat the pillow on one end of the couch and the blanket on the other. "You should lay down."

"No."

Roy sighed and sat down beside Ed. "Your shaking just lay down ok? Go to sleep."

"I'm fine"

"No your not."

Ed looked at Roy, then back down at the floor. "I know"

"Go to sleep Ed, maybe you'll feel better when you wake." Roy said standing up.

Ed just looked up Roy, "Is Winry ok? I know I scared her."

"I'm going to check on her." Roy reassured Ed, "As soon as you lay down."

"Ok" Ed swung his leg over onto the couch and lay down.

Roy knocked on Winry's door.

"Yes?"

"Hey. I got him to lay down."

"Ok good. What's wrong with him?"

"He hasn't had a drink in a few days and he is feeling the effects."

"He looked so run down."

"He is depressed. He has moments when he breaks down but he always bounces back. I Just hope he keeps getting better."

"We all do."

"You ok?"

"Yeah I'm fine. Why?"

"He thought he scared you."

"I was just worried."

Roy smiled. "Go to sleep and finish Ed's arm later ok?"

"Ok"

"Goodnight."

Roy walked into the front room. Ed was lying on his side eyes closed. Roy walked past him and sat on the chair to read for a while. It was nearing 6 A.M. he saw no point in sleeping he had to leave for work in a few hours.

"Roy?"

Roy looked up to see Winry standing across the room from him. "What?"

"What time are you two leaving in the morning?"

"At seven thirty or so, that is if he feels ok, and if he can get a leg."

"His leg is done it just needs to be installed."

"Ok I'll wake you at seven would that work?"

"Yes"

"Then you should go sleep for an hour" Roy laughed.

"Edward?" Roy shook him alittle. He only been a sleep 45 minutes but he wanted to know how he felt.

"Stop!" Ed grumbled in his sleep.

"Edward it's me Roy."

Ed's eyes flew open and he just stared at Roy before he felt tears coming.

"It was just a dream."

"Nightmare."

"You feeling any better?"

"Yeah." Ed said sitting up.

"You going to stay here or go with me?"

"Go with you."

Roy was expecting him to stay at the house. "Ok?"

"I want to see everyone, I wish you had a dog. I'd take it with us to screw with Breda." Ed laughed, and Roy joined in.

"Sorry to disappoint."

"Wait I am going to be able to go right?"

"Yes, I'm going to wake up Winry in a minute. When do you want to eat?"

"Later."

"Ok"

"Ready 1-2-3"

And like that Ed's automail was installed.

"I swear you love causing me pain!"

"Sorry. I think your good to go. I'm going to bed when you get home your arm will be done."

"Ok" Ed said.

"Lets go."

"Alright."

Ok let's get this show back on the rode!!!

Review!


	13. HQ

Chapter 13

"How long of a drive is it?" Ed asked as he got in the car.

"About ten minutes, I told you that four times already." Roy said looking at Ed.

"Sorry" Ed sat in the passenger set of the car fidgeting.

After about ten minutes Roy realized Ed couldn't sit still.

"Excited or something?"

"Huh?"

"You can't stop fidgeting. You ok?"

"I'm fine."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, damn it! What more is there to say? I'm bored I fidget! I sit still to long I fidget!" Ed snapped.

Roy just sighed.

"Good Morning General!" Roy's team said together, then saluting.

"Morning at ease." Roy waved his hand at them, "The couch is free for the day."

Everyone in the room blinked, "Sir? Who are you tal-" Hawkeye froze in mid sentence when Ed stepped foot in the office.

"You have got to be shitting me!?" Breda half yelled, causing Ed to wince.

"Hey guys." Ed waved.

Silence. Then soon followed by an uproar.

"Good to have you back Ed!" Breda said.

"Yes, how you been?" Hawkeye asked.

"You've grown!!" the rest said.

"Hey kid" Jean smiled.

"Heh heh yeah." Ed smiled, and rubbed the back of his head.

"Where have you been Ed?" Fury asked.

Ed turned and looked at Roy. Roy shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, then turned toward his desk.

"Um different places really," Ed stated cautiously.

"Ed can you run down and get me something from the library?" Roy asked handing him a paper.

"Yeah sure." Ed said with a thankful smile.

"And grab yourself a book" Roy smiled.

"Ok thanks." And with that said Ed was gone.

As soon as the door closed everyone turned toward the General, and replaced the smiles with, either glaring or just plain confused expressions. Roy lifts an eyebrow.

"Is he sick?" Hawkeye asked.

"Yeah no shit, what's wrong with him?" Breda added.

"He was deadly pale." Fury pointed out. "And skinny"

Roy glanced over at Havoc, whom gave him a look that reinsured Roy that he hadn't said a word.

"I promised I wouldn't say anything, so please work up the nerve to ask Edward yourself." Roy said in his 'business-like' tone.

"Yes Sir" They said in unison.

"Sir you have some paperwork on your desk." Hawkeye pointed out.

"Yes I noticed that thank you, please carry on with your own worries."

Ed looked at the paper Roy had handed him.

_I saved your ass! Ask the librarian if I have any papers there. Don't waste too much time shorty. _

"That bastard!" Ed mumbled under his breath, stuffing the paper in his pocket and walking on to the library. It was two floors down. Ed realized he was sweating when he was half way down the first flight of stairs. 'What the hell? Sure I'm out of shape but not that damn bad.' Pushing that back he continued on to the library.

Once in the library he walked up to the desk, "Hey do you have any papers for General Roy Mustang? He sent me to get them."

"Let me see your watch." The older woman working the shift said, Ed already knew he did like her.

"I don't have it anymore."

"Then I'll have to tell you to leave."

"And I can't do that. He sent more to get the damned papers and a book!"

"You have to be in the military to do that."

"Listen to me you old hag! I was sent here by the General if you don't believe call the damned bastard up!"

Amazingly she picked up the phone and called Roy.

"I'm sorry Edward. Here are his papers and you can get them when u check out a book."

"Thank you!"

"Here bastard!" Ed said as he held out the papers to Roy.

"Thanks Ed- you ok?" Roy asked concerned.  
'No' Ed thought. "Yeah I'm fine."

Roy looked Ed square in the eyes. "Do you want to now why I asked?" he whispered after glaring at his subordinates signaling them to return to their work.

Ed lifted his eyebrow in question.

"You are sweating and shaking." Roy pointed out.

"I'm fine." Ed turned away to sit on the couch and read his book.

After fifteen minutes he threw the book down and stretched out on the couch.

"Done?" Roy asked.

"No can't get into it."

"Really?"

"Yes- " Ed stopped mid-sentence at the feeling of nausea. Ed jumped off the couch and ran to the nearest thrash can and vomited. Roy jumped up by his side and put a concerned hand on Ed's back, "You ok?"

"No" Ed said. "What's happening?"

"Ed your at headquarters with me. You just threw up. Are you going to again?"

Ed was silent. Roy noticed Ed was shaking and he fell to the floor hitting hit head hard.

"HE IS HAVING A SEIZURE CALL THE INFIRMARY NOW!" Roy yelled reaching up on his desk for anything to hold down Ed's tongue, grabbing a spoon from his breakfast. He put it in his own mouth to get and food particles off the put it in Ed's.

Havoc ran over to help Roy hold Ed still while Hawkeye phone the infirmary. The others rushed to help Roy. Havoc held down Ed's shoulders, Breda had his arms; Fury an Falman had his legs, while Roy held the spoon in place along with his head.

"They're on the way!"

As soon as Hawkeye said that he stopped seizing.

Roy took the spoon out of his mouth and wiped Ed's face off everyone backed off a little.

"Ed?" Roy grabbed both sides of Ed's head and lifted his head, putting his hand on the back of his head. Then he felt something wet as the door to his office opened. "Shit! He's bleeding!"

Ok so I only go like 2 reviews! I would be happy if there were MORE!!!


	14. Sedative

Chapter 14

Sitting in the dark, watching Ed's unsteadying raising and falling chest. Listening to the faint beeping of the heart monitor, and the other odd noises coming from the breathing aids. He had a small breathing tube resting on the inside of his noise and a bandage around his head. Sighing Roy leaned back pulling out his watch. 1:30 am. Replacing it in his pocket he leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees. Reading over everything to make sure it was all in order. Feeling content with the readings he looked back to Ed. Blinking away the tears looked over his charts again. They sedated him, to prevent convulsing. Roy refused to sleep until Ed woke from his first and hopefully last dose of sedative. He put the chart down next to him as the nurse walked in with a cup of hot coffee.

"Here Mustang I thought you might like this" She said quickly.

"Huh? Oh thank you." Roy said taking the coffee.

"K. He family?" She asked looking at Ed.

"No. Just a close friend." Roy said taking a sip of the bitter coffee.

"Oh, I see."

"When is that sedative supposed to fade?" Roy asked hopefully.

Looking at her watch she replied, "20 minutes. But please be aware Sir, he won't be himself at all for awhile, and he might have to be sedated-"

"I am aware of that nurse!" Roy snapped startling her, " I just don't want it to happen." He said quieter.

She patted his shoulder and left.

Roy sat his coffee on the floor and scooted his chair closer to Ed's bed. Roy watched his unsteady breathing for a while when he realized he needed to call Winry back. He called her earlier but made he stay at home he knew she would freak and he didn't have the patience for that not until Ed woke from his first and last dose.

"Mustang residence." Winry said shakily on the other end.

"Winry, It's Roy. He is still stable sorry I forgot to call." Roy said,

"It's just fine. When do you think I can see him?" She asked.

"Later tomorrow after everyone else leaves. I mean you no offense but there will be a lot of people in and out the later you come the better." Roy explained.

"Yes, I under stand. Roy go to sleep please you sound awful."

"Bye" And with that he hung up the phone. Rubbing his eyes he looked back at Edward. This is turning out to be the longest 20 minutes of his life.

Roy was sitting next to Ed with his head resting on the bed when he heard movement. Looking up he saw that Ed had his automail over the IV in his arm. "Ed leave it."

"Nnn" Ed mumbled

As if on cue the nurse walked in. She saw the look on Roy's face, "Just here for the next 15 minutes, to watch him."

Turning back to Ed; Roy half smiled. He lifted Ed's hand away from the IV.

After about 10 more minutes of this Ed opened his eyes. "Roy?"

"Right here."

Ed turned and looked at him then looked at the ceiling. "Whermi?"

"The infirmary."

"Why?"

Roy went on to explain everything he could.

"I get it" Ed said Roy could tell the sedative was completely worn off because Ed was talking clearly and the nurse left closing the door behind her.

"Is that bastard here? That Berrett bitch?"

Roy smiled, "I don't know"

"Hmpf! I sure as hell hope not."

"Calm down, I don't want you sedated again," Roy said laying his head on the bed.

Ed raised the top half of the bed and looked at Roy. "What time is it?"

"About 2 am" Roy replied sleepily.

"You been awake this whole time?"

"Mmhmm"

"Why?" Ed asked confused.

"I care" and with that said Roy feel asleep.

Ed raised an eyebrow. Sitting there in confusion Ed watched Roy sleep.

10Minutes later Ed stomach growled loud enough for anyone else to hear. Putting his hand over his stomach he looked at Roy. It startled Ed to see onyx eyes looking up at his golden ones.

"Was that your stomach or mine?" Roy asked sitting up.

"Mine, sorry I woke you." Ed apologized looking down at the white bed sheets.

"Don't. I wasn't sleeping well. I shouldn't have let myself fall asleep that easy anyway." Roy said standing up.

"You have been up since Winry woke us up working on that damned automail!" Ed explained.

"Are you hungry or not?" Roy said hoping to change the subject.

"Yeah" Ed replied quietly.

"Ok I'll find the nurse." Roy said leaving the room.

Ed looked up and watched Roy leave and close the door behind him. Sighing Ed leaned back. 'What is his problem? Why won't he just take my advice and go to sleep?'

"Ok Ed, in about fifteen minutes they will bring you something to eat." Roy said crossing the room to sit by Ed.

"What about you?" Ed asked.

"Huh?"

"Aren't you hungry?"

"I'll wait." Roy said flatly.

"Why? You said you were hungry." Ed asked.

"…"

"Damnit Roy! Talk to me!"

"I know I said I was hungry! I don't want to ask the nurse to make be a meal! Plus, I had an idea." Roy said.

"And what would that be?"

"As soon as I can I'll run down the street and order us some take out. But you need to eat now." Roy explained. Suddenly Roy found a smile forming on his lips, as Ed's eyes lit up at what he just said.

"I'm just glad your ok, Edward." Roy said sitting down on the bed next to Ed. "We need to talk though. About your outbursts while you're here."

"Why?"

"They will sedate you again if the find it necessary. So please keep calm. They'll let you out in a few days time if they think I can handle you." Roy explained.

"Edward? Here is your dinner." The nurse said as walked in.

"Thanks"

Roy sat in the chair while Ed downed his food then suddenly stopped. Roy noticed the lack of movement a looked up.

"What's – oh my god Edward it won't kill you!" Roy said rolling his eyes and laughing.

Ed glared in Roy's direction, "I think it might." Ed joked then continued eating.

Roy wasn't completely sure what Ed was eating.

A few minutes passed and Roy was no longer in the same world as Ed. He was lost in his own thoughts.

"Here." Ed said to Roy handing him a biscuit, half of the mystery meat, and the glass of milk. Roy blinked, "You eat it and try to drink your milk."

"I refuse to drink white opaque liquid that's secreted from a cow! And I don't feel right about eating in front of you. Knowing you're not going to eat for hours."

"So he has a heart." Roy said taking up his offer.

"Who ever said I didn't?"

Roy smirked biting into the mystery meat. Ed decided to go back to sleep while he ate.

Roy had just put his mind to ease as he slowly started drifting off to sleep. That was until Ed started tossing and turning. Ed's heartbeat had sped up. Roy went and sat on the bed next to Ed. Tapping Ed's shoulder Roy said, "Edward it is just a dream wake up."

Suddenly in his sleep Ed latched himself around Roy's neck. Roy wrapped his arms around Ed. "Edward wake up." Roy could tell that Ed had in fact woke up as he said that. "You ok?"

"I'm sorry." Ed said shakily and pulled back.

"Don't be" Roy pulled Ed back into the embrace. "Sometimes people need each other. As awkward as it may seem."

"Thank you" Ed said voice cracking under pressure of holding back years of tears. "I miss Al so much, Roy." Ed said sobbing.

Roy tightened his embrace, as did Ed. "Just let it out."

"I killed him! It's my entire fault! DAMN IT why couldn't it have been me!? I just want to die!" Ed said into Roy's neck.

"No you don't. Edward don't say that, don't even think it!" Roy's word where cold and harsh.

"And Why not? No one will miss me."

Roy pushed Ed off him and slapped him. "You would be missed by so many people! Damn it Ed, look around, I would miss you, Winry, Riza, Falman, every one of the guys. All those peoples who life's you have saved! I never want you to think that way again!" Roy felt tears weal up in his eyes; he refused to hide them this time. "Edward Elric, do you think your bother wants to see you take your own life?" Tears freely flowing from both of their eyes.

Ed shook his head.

"Never say that again." Roy said pulling Ed back.

"I'm sorry." Ed said turning his face into the nape of Roy's neck.

"I'm just glad you told me." Roy said leaning his head on Ed's. "When was the last time you visited Alphonse?"

"…" Ed let a small sob escape his lips.

"Ok, in a few weeks or a month. We'll go visit him ok?"

Ed's only response was another soft sob and burying his face in the nape of Roy's neck.

"Do you want to go? I'll go with you or I'll stay- "

"No I'll go just go with me. I-I would go crazy being trapped with that Winry." Ed stressed.

"But I thought you and Winry secretly loved each other." Roy said confused.

"Alphonse did."

"I'm sorry."

"…"

They sat embracing each other, wrapped in silence. Roy was beginning to wonder how long they had sit like that when he heard a soft snore escape from Ed. Roy slowly laid Ed down and sat back in his chair. His shoulder was soaked. He looked back at Ed whose face was litter with tears. 'He must've cried himself to sleep.' Roy decided. Roy wiped off Ed's face. Ed moved his face into Roy's hand. Roy smiled softly and caressed his face. "Goodnight Edward" Roy watched a smile appear on Ed's face. Sitting back down he rested his head on Ed's bed. 'I have got to talk to Ed at home when it's just us. I bet all those cuts were self-inflicted. Damn it.' Roy looked up and looked at Ed's arm and wrist. 'They have to be.' Roy felt tears in his eyes. 'I'm so fucking blind!' Roy ran his finger over the deepest scar on Ed's wrist. Ed shivered and moved his arm away shaking his head. 'Responsive sleeper' "Why?"

"Nn"Ed mumbled.

Roy gently grabbed Ed's wrist did you cut yourself? Tell the truth. I won't be mad"

"Yeesss"

"Why?"

"Miss Al, not love"

Roy was confused but Ed was waking up. So Roy quit talking and just held Ed's wrist lightly as he fell asleep.

In his sleep Ed moved his hand up grasping Roy's. Roy returned the favor as a smile appeared on both their sleeping faces.


	15. Your Eyes

Be sure you read chapter 14

Chapter 15

Ed woke up pissed not knowing why. Ed lifted his hand to scratch his head, but it was weighed down. "What the hell?" Ed looked down to see his hand and Mustangs intertwined. Ed's turned as red as a tomato. He slowly removed his hand from Roy's and let him sleep.

"Ed?" Roy said as he sat up. His back was stiff and his head was pounding.

"What" Ed asked grumpily.

"What's wrong?"

"You slept though that doctor coming in and poking holes in me."

"Who is your doctor?"

"None other than that Berrett bitch." Ed said quietly remembering what Roy had said earlier.

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah the worse part is-"

Dr. Berrett came through the door with a smile on his face. "Good Morning Roy! I come baring good news! If you agree to these terms Ed Can go home. His DT is what caused the seizure. Now I have worked with a lot of DT patients and Edward here has almost completely bounced back!"(1)

"He can go home?" Roy asked.

"Yes, but he is to stay home. He needs to drink lots of fluids and eat properly for a week."

"Yeah, what's best for him to drink?"

"Juices, water, tea, or milk."

Ed inwardly cringed at the sound of milk. Roy smirked, "Can he live without the milk?"

"I suppose."

"Ok then when do we sign him out?" Roy asked.

"After I get the papers ready." And with that Dr. Berrett turned and left.

"He has to be on drugs! How is it possible to be so happy this early in the morning, and at work for that!?" Ed said.

"Morning people piss me off." Roy stated blankly.

"Me too."

Roy turned and looked at Ed's face. He was improving as far as his physical state was concerned. The dark circles under his eyes were disappearing. He was getting color back, his hair needed a trim but even it looked healthier. Ed turned and looked at him, Roy noticed that Ed's eyes hadn't changed back to their fiery state. They stayed dull, as if all had failed him.

"You are looking better Ed." Roy said with a small smile on his face.

"Really?" Ed asked looking away from Roy.

"Yeah. Are you feeling any better?"

Ed looked back at Roy with a fake smile. "Yeah I do."

'Liar,' Roy thought looking into Ed's eyes. At this point in Ed's life you could read him like a book, just from those eyes. The smile as only halfhearted, anyone could see that. But those damn eyes were a dead give-away. Dull, depressed, self mutilated, pained, and stained with unshed tears.

"You ok Roy? You look sick." Ed asked.

"Oh I'm just stressed. Don't worry I'll be fine." Roy said.

"Sorry."

"It's fine, stop apologizing for every little thing." Roy said slightly annoyed.

"You didn't have to stay here. I've been alone in a hospital before." Ed said.

"I had to stay. I can't leave you alone right now. I know you disagree, but trust me you just need some ones presence. Some one you know." Roy explained.

Ed glared at Roy at first, then softened and jerked his head away. "Whatever."

Roy stood and out his hand on Ed's shoulder briefly, "I'll be right back."

Ed turned and looked up at him and nodded. Roy smiled then left to the restroom. Ed sat back and let his mind wander. Immediately he thought of what happened when he woke this morning. 'Why in hell where we holding hands? That's just wrong. I know Roy wouldn't do that, damn womanizing bastard, and I don't swing that way.' Then suddenly Ed remembered that dream he had last night. Roy was asking him questions about his flesh arm. Ed lifted his arm and looked at the scars. 'I really hope it was just a dream, Al always said I was to responsive in my sleep.' At that thought tears weald up in Ed's eyes. As if on cue Roy walked in. "Ok Ed, we can leave in about an hour. Ed? What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Ed shakily said.

"Ed stop lying. What's the matter?" Roy said sitting on the bed.

"I was just thinking about Alphonse." Ed admitted quietly.

"Ah, you going to be ok?" Roy asked.

"Yeah. What were you saying when you came in?"

"That you can leave in about an hour."

Ed smiled and nodded.

"When is Winry leaving?" Roy asked.

"Soon I hope. She irritates me." Ed said.

"I'll talk to her. See if I can't get her to leave after she takes care of your arm." Roy said.

"Good, I know it seems rude, but I couldn't handle being locked alone in the same house with her."

"Don't worry your pretty little head on that. You ain't staying by yourself just yet."

"You're taking off work?"

"No I can't do that again, not for a few weeks anyway"

"But Berrett bitch said I have to stay home an-"

"And there is a couch in my office."

Ed looked out the window of the car and saw the house, "Winry's going to kill me"

"No she won't"

And with that said Roy pulled the car into the driveway and parked. He got out and helped Ed into the house.

"I can walk."

"Sorry," Roy said. Ed looked up at the taller man. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing…don't look at me like that…Ok fine. You haven't been respecting my help."

"Yes I have."

"ED!!!" Winry screamed and ran towards him being stopped but Roy.

"If you ran and jump on him he will fall." Roy warned.

"Hey Winry." Ed said with a smile. She walked up and hugged him, "I'm so happy your ok." She pulled away then kissed his forehead and turned away.

Roy was staring intently at Ed's face. Face blank, eyes pained. "Ed you want to go lay down?" Ed only nodded in response. Roy walked over and put his hand in-between Ed's shoulder blades, gently pushing him forward.

"Are you two hungry?" Winry asked politely.

Roy looked at Ed who only nodded again. "Yes, thank you Winry." Roy said pushing Ed toward his room.

Ed sat on the bed as Roy closed the door. "Edward, she didn't know. I'm sorry I shouldn't have let her touch you. I only thought she would hug you. I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" Roy quickly said kneeling on the floor in front of Ed. Roy looked directly into Ed's eyes. What he saw was enough to make him cry. Edward Elric's eyes looked hollow, almost dead. "Edward talk to me! Are you ok?"

"Yes." Ed said closing his eyes.

"Ed I'm so sorry I shouldn't have let her touch you."

"Shut up, it's not your fault." Ed looked up startled at what he saw, onyx eyes boring into his, like his was reading him, "Roy, stop worrying about me."

"Edward," Roy sighed, "Later you and me need to have a serious talk."

"What about?" Ed asked.

Roy just looked at Ed, "I'll be right back."

Roy left the room closing the door behind him. Going into the kitchen he saw Winry putting food one a two different plates. "Winry, I'm sorry to tell you this but you can't stay much longer."

"What? I hadn't planned on it but why?" Winry asked, keeping her cool.

"Doctors orders." Roy lied.

"Oh, ok. When does Ed want his arm installed?"

"About that I was wondering if you could let me install it." Roy asked.

"What!? You have to be trained to-"

"Then train me." Roy said flatly.

"I – I can't"

"So be it. Ed's going to eat then go to bed I'll be in there with him for a while if you need anything, please hesitate to ask." Roy said grabbing the two plates of food and turned.

"Do you mean _don't _hesitate to ask?" Winry asked.

"No." Roy walked back into Ed's room and handed him the food and sat his own plate down and sat on the floor.

"Roy? What's wrong?"

"…"

"Roy?"

"I just kicked Winry out of the house."

"You what?"

"You heard me."

"Ok, why'd you do that?"

Roy looked up at Ed, "You should have seen what she did to you."

"What are you talking about?"

"When she kissed you on the forehead, you, I don't know how to explain it."

"Oh. Yeah, it pissed me off. And…" Ed trailed off.

"Don't worry about it just eat.

Ed obeyed. He was about half done when Roy started picking at his own plate.

"I thought you where hungry."

Lost my appetite."

"You said we needed to talk." Ed said sitting sown his plate and hold out his hand to Roy, whom was sitting on the floor.

Roy took his hand and stood before sitting on the bed next to Ed. "Yeah."

"What about?"

Roy reached and grabbed Ed's wrist. "This"

Ed froze, 'Damn it!'

"I told you-"

"You lied! Now Edward, please don't lie, just telling me why and when." Roy demanded.

Ed just stared at Roy. "No."

"What?"

"I refuse to repeat what I said last night!"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm an responsive sleeper, sometimes when people talk to me in my sleep I dream it."

Roy was shocked, "All you said to me last night was, 'Miss Al, Not love' "

Ed just sat there staring at the wall across the room.

"Ed?"

"I miss Alphonse. And no one loves me. Don't slap me again."

"Edward, damn it what do you mean by love? The one? She is out there some where but you haven't found her yet."

Ed jerked his head around and glared at Roy, "Shut up." Roy caught a glimpse of Ed's eyes and saw pain, and something else but what? Ed lied down on the bed back to Roy.

"Ed?"

"Shut up"

Roy sat on the edge of the bed until he heard a small snore from Ed. Roy laid down on the floor next to Ed's bed, knowing he would most likely have a nightmare.

Three hours later Roy woke up and looked at Ed. He was asleep, but he was shaking and crying. Roy wasn't fully awake, but he climbed into bed with Ed and pulled him close, "Be calm you're ok." Ed stopped shaking and buried his face into Roy's chest, falling into a deep sleep, as did Roy.

I know they would never let ANYONE out that soon after DTs but I wanted him out of the hospital. Sorry

By the way, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY REVIEWS???

Do I have to start giving numbers again? I hope not, I know I'm not a good author but damn people. O.o


	16. Feelings

Chapter16

Slowly, Ed rolled onto his back. He was so warm, he never felt so…safe before. But why? No longer caring he slowly drifted back to sleep, only to wake moment's later, cold. Subconsciously he rolled back onto his side curling up to the warmth next him. Taking in the sent he rested his forehead on the warmth, then drifted off in a very light sleep. Feeling something being draped over him and pulling him closer woke Edward up. Furrowing his brow in confusion he opened his eyes. Jaw dropping, eyes widening, Ed brought his automail leg and arm around and roughly hitting non other than Roy Mustang, directly in the stomach. Roy hit the hardwood floor with a loud _thump_. The now fully awake, and fully enraged, Roy Mustang, lay on the floor gasping for breath, with his arms wrapped around himself.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" Ed yelled stand up and making his way to the bathroom down the hall.

"Bitchy man." Roy mumbled trying to stand and failing. Roy managed to lay on his back, unbuttoning his shirt he saw the bruise that was already beginning to form, 'I may die for this, I can see it now, 'General Roy Mustang the Flame Alchemist, dead due to internal bleeding, caused for Edward Elric.' Stupid man.' Roy thought actually standing. He staggered out of Ed's room in time to see Ed leave the bathroom and storm into Winry's room, yelling at her. "GET YOU ASS UP!!! I need you to help me put this piece of shit on!" Ed ranted. Roy shut the door and them cringed when he heard Winry yelling at Ed for being to pushy.

Turning on the shower Roy stripped down to just his boxers, while he waited for the water to heat up.

"Edward calm down what's your problem?" Winry yelled.

"Nothing bitch shut up." Ed slammed the door to his room.

Roy was about to take off his boxers when he heard a light knock on the door. He cracked open the door and saw a fuming Winry standing there. "What's his – Roy?! What happened to you stomach?!" Roy slowly shut the door and locked it quickly getting in the shower. Feeling the hot water run over his stressed body Roy sighed, 'When and more importantly why did I get in bed with Edward?' Sighing and shaking his head, Roy reached for the soap and slowly lathered up his torso, examining it was he did so. Scars, and now that huge bruise that was only half developed, covered his well-toned body. Roy finished soaping his body and rinsed then turned his back to the showerhead and with the bar of soap he scrubbed his hair, it felt so good for some reason today. 'Possibly because I was in a hospital all night then didn't shower yesterday.' Roy though, rinsing his hair. Stepping out of the shower he dried off and looked around, "Well shit." Wrapping the towel around his waste he walked into his room, which was connected to the bathroom. He hurried to close his bedroom door, and then put on some boxers, jeans, and a loose fitting t-shirt. Walking into the kitchen he saw Winry sitting in the front room. "Morning," Roy said plopping down on the couch.

"Morning, sorry, but what's wrong with Edward?" Winry asked, "Is he mad at me for yesterday?"

Roy closed his eyes and sighed, "Right now he is mad at me, and I think he just took it out on you."

"Oh, why is he mad at - " Winry was cut off by the sound of glass breaking.

"Stay here!" Roy demanded her.

Quickly standing, wincing at the growing pain on his stomach, he hurried to Ed's room. "Edward?" Roy asked knocking on the door.

"Stay out!"

"Why? What are you doing?" Roy asked slowly and quietly turning the knob. Ed run up and pushed the door shut, leaning on it preventing Roy from opening it. Knowing something has to wrong Roy took a few steps back and slammed his shoulder onto the door, "Open the door!"

"Go to hell!"

Roy slammed his hand on the door twice, now completely pissed, "Open it!"

"…"

"Edward!" Roy hit the door again, "I'll burn it!"

"Fuck you!"

Roy's eyes widened, turning away from the door he went into the bathroom getting his gloves and walked back. "Edward?"

"Let me alone!"

Taking a breath Roy clamed himself somewhat, "Open the door."

"No"

Roy tried to push the door, "Forget it." Roy put his forehead to the door, "Edward, please open the door." No response. Taking a deep breath he looked down the hall to she Winry looking at him, "I told you to stay put!"

"What are you talking about," Ed's strained voice replied.

"Sorry Sir," Winry said turning.

"I was talking to Winry. Listen Ed, why won't you open the door?" Roy lowered his voice so only Ed could hear through the door. "Did you cut?"

Roy heard movement and amazingly the door opened and saw two dull eyes staring at the floor. Ed turned away and laid face down on the bed. Roy looked back to make sure Winry wasn't following, then walked in closing the door behind him. Roy looked at Ed in time to see a piece of glass fall to the floor. Walking over Roy looked at it, and then to Ed. Bending down Roy picked it up, "Ow" Roy whispered under his breath. Roy sighed in relief when he saw it was clean. Slowly sitting next to Ed, Roy put a hand on Ed's back. "Edward, I truly don't remember getting in the bed with you, but I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, trust me that's the very last thing I want to do."

Ed closed his eyes tightly and clenched his jaw, 'He doesn't understand, he never will, I can't tell him.' Ed thought, holding back tears. Ed's eyes flew open when the hand that was on his back started moving in a soothing motion. Ed shook his head. "Edward, just tell me what's on your mind, nothing you can say will make me think differently of you. Please Edward, tell me." Roy pleaded. Ed shook his head again. "Will you tell Winry?"

"NO!" Ed yelled into the pillow, "If I won't tell you what makes you think I'll tell her?"

"Ed, it was just an offer." Roy looked at Ed. "Look at me."

Ed turned his head so Roy could see the right half of his face. Refusing to look Roy in the eyes, but that was all Roy needed. "Ed, I know you are hiding something," Roy said, he could see it in Ed's eyes. Pain, guilt, they looked hollow again. It pained Roy to see Ed that way. Roy looked away from Ed, seeing all the broken glass on the floor; Roy knew where Ed acquired the shard. His glass of water from last night was now on the floor. He patted Ed's back lightly and went to pick up the glass. As he bent down he winced.

"What's wrong with you?" Ed asked.

Roy gave Ed a questioning look, "Want me to tell you or show you?"

"Huh?"

Roy lifted his t-shirt; the purple-black bruise had grown. Ed's eyes grew wide as he stood, "I did that?"

"Yeah…" Roy said letting his shirt drop.

"No, let me see it again."

Confusion took over Roy's face as he obeyed. Ed examined it for a moment, "I didn't break anything did I?"

"No, I've had broken ribs before, you didn't hurt me."

"Yes I did! Look at yourself! I'm so sorry."

"Ed it's just a bruise."

"I don't care!"

"Why?"

Shock took over Ed's face; he almost let it slip. Roy noted the scared shock, confusion, and still yet pain in Ed's eyes. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing." Ed bent down clapping his hands, leaving the now fixed glass sitting in the middle of the room when he walked over to his bed. "Edward, please."

Ignoring Roy Ed sat on the bed not looking Roy in the eye. "Edward" Ed looked at Roy, pained eyes digging deep into Roy's chest, before he looked away again, it burnt, made him want to cry, but why? Roy couldn't understand these feelings he has been getting for months. Roy was completely oblivious to the fact the Ed had the same problem, and it wasn't helping his depression any. Simultaneously the shook off the feeling the best they could, looking directly into each others eyes; gold clashing with black. Bullion with onyx. Then they realized, 'I love him' blushing slightly Ed turned away and Roy just stared. "What just went through your mind?" Roy asked.

"…"

"Edward…"

"I can't" Ed said quietly. Roy walked over and sat by Ed trying not to wince as he lowered himself down, failing.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Don't be. When do you want to get that automail installed?"

"Whenever I can."

"How's right know sound?"

"Yeah."

They stood and walked out of the room.

"Ready Ed? On three, 1-2-3!"

Ed body convulsed slightly as he moaned in pain, refusing to scream.

Roy standing across the room was amazed at Ed's reaction to all the pain.

"Roy! Help me move him to the couch." Roy picked Ed up and lightly laid him on the couch. Roy watched Ed for a moment, "Why did he react this way?"

The arm hurts more for some reason and he is also a little out of shape for it,"

"I see."

"If it's not to bold of me to ask, but you deeply care for him don't you?"

"He is my closest – "

"I don't mean it like that."

"Oh…" Roy looked back at Ed, and nodded, "it pains me though"

"You should tell him, I think he has the same feelings for you."

"When are you taking your leave?"

"In 4 hours" ok let's get you packed."

Little did they know, Ed was fully conscience at hearing what he did he was amazed at say the least.

I am very pleased with my reviews!! Keep it up!!!

Tell me your true thought on this AND I need ideas,

Who should admit their love first? And how? I will give you credit for the idea!!!


	17. I Hurt You

Chapter 17

Thinking back Ed decided he had had feelings for Roy longer than he realized. Years he decided he had a thing for Roy he just denied it. He found it strange that it just hit him so suddenly like that. 'Is that why I argue with him so much?' Ed couldn't understand any of this it was driving him up the wall. 'Nine years of knowing the man, it takes nine years to come to conclusions that you have a crush. On another man for that much! What's that make me? I'm not gay I know I'm not. God you really hate me!' Ed sat up for a few minutes, 'SHIT! What would Al think? Shit, why did he have to die, it should have been me!' Roy slowly walked into the room startling Ed.

"Hey, you ready to go? We're taking Winry to the station."

"Yeah."

"Ok lets go."

Ed sat up front with Roy while Winry sat in the back, rambling on and on. Ed stared out the window ignoring everything Winry said. Watching the buildings as they passed one caught his eye. Ed glared at it as they passed then shifted in his set looked dead ahead. 'Damn bars they are everywhere. Just one drink would be so nice.' Ed thought. Out of the corner of his eye Ed saw Roy watching him. Roy didn't have his head turned, just his eye, it sent cold chills up his spine. Ed lifted and eyebrow to Roy's look. Roy lifted both his eyebrows and slightly, barely noticeable, he shook his head. Inwardly smiling Ed looked back out the window, 'Thank everything good in this world and every other one.' Ed thought seeing the train station. It was going to take a few more minutes, if he could hold out that long. Ed looked over at Roy as the older man let out a sigh of relief. Ed wanted to laugh so bad. Winry in the back had finally shut up, smiling to herself. Little did they know she saw their ways of silent communication, she loved seeing this, and maybe Ed will be happy again.

"Something happen back there? Did you die?" Ed asked as Roy pulled the car into the station parking lot.

"No." Winry said as she along with everyone else got out of the car, Roy walked around to join in the conversation.

"You want us to go in with you?" Roy asked quickly.

"Naw it's fine."

"Ok then we'll see you later." Roy said

"Yeah see you guys." Winry said hugging them both and walking off. Roy looked down at Ed. "Want to go grab some food to take home?"

"Sounds good to me." Ed said with an actually smile on his face.

Smiling back Roy said, "Yeah, lets go."

Ed got in the car before Roy, looking over he watched Roy ease himself in the car. Ed sighed, "I'm sorry I did that to you."

"Edward this is my fault, just as much if not more than yours! Please let it go, I'm fine." Roy stressed looking Ed straight in the eyes. "Why do you insist on taking the blame for everything?" Roy asked watching Ed's face closely.

"Lets just go get something to eat." Ed said.

'Every time. I'll get it out of him at a better time.' Roy thought.

After a few minutes of silence Roy broke it, "What does Winry do with the automail?"

"She revises it and either slaps it back on me or sells it."

"That's a crude way of putting it."

"How should I put it." Ed said looking out the window, resting his head on the cool glass.

"I don't know Edward I don't know." Roy said feeling slightly defeated.

Subconsciously ed ran his automail thumb over his wrist lightly, Roy caught the movement out of the corner of his eye. Looking forward see no traffic he sped up, the car was driving him mad, literally. Ed's little antics where staring to annoy him. "Lack of sleep that has to be it, grab some food go home eat go to bed.' Roy thought, 'It's so simple that it will be ruined one way or another.' Looking over at Ed, he noticed ed was tracing over a deep scar. Roy reached over pulling Ed's hand away and returned his own hand to the steering wheel.

"Ok? What was that for?" Ed asked.

"You were rubbing that scar."

"Oh…"

Roy pulled into a fast food restaurant; "I can trust that you'll be here in the same condition when I get back right?"

"Yeah."

"Ok I'll be right back."

Ed sat there mind blank. He watched Roy walk into the restaurant and order. Ed looked out the window away from Roy; it was getting dark.

"Hey," Roy said as he eased himself into the car.

Ed started slightly at Roy's sudden appearance, "Hey, what ya get?"

"Ramen, I figured it didn't much matter since you'll eat anything," Rou smirked pulling out of the car. His attitude had lightened up a bit, just getting out of the car for that amount of time help dramatically.

"Trying to imply something there, Flame?" Ed growled.

"Not at all Ed."

Driving in silence Roy let his mind wander: weather that was the best idea. What ever came upon him to fall for Edward? He knew this wasn't some ridiculous crush, Roy knew this feeling, only this, this was so much stronger than before. Stronger than both times. He had known he was bisexual for years. But, why Ed?

Ed yawned and stretched resting his elbow on the door frame putting his chin in his palm.

"Ok, does he have to do that?" the twice heartbroken Gerenal thought. 'This is terrifying, why did I fall for him?' he couldn't tell Ed, he couldn't handle the rejection, not for a third time. The first was to worst, he admitted his love to that man, rejected, it's not like he rudely said no, but he would have rather been told to go to hell than the reply he got. The second time he never got around to telling her, but when he was about to she said he was just like a brother to her, always there for her, so he never admitted it to her.

"Roy? What's wrong?" Ed asked clear worry in his voice.

"Nothing," Sadness and pain hinted behind the fake reinsurance in Roy's voice.

"You're lying. What's wrong?" Ed asked again.

"It's nothing Edward."

"Ok since you won't tell now, will you later?"

"Maybe, with time."

Ed sighed, "You better, I have told you plenty about me that I didn't want anyone to know."

"I know Ed, I promise, I will tell you, in time."

Ed arched an eyebrow then smirked, "I'll hold it to you."

Roy looked over at Ed, hope in the younger mans eyes. Roy smiled lightly then quickly looked back at the road when he caught him-self looking down Ed's body.

Roy pulled into the small drive way. They went in and sat in the front room, opening their ramen bowls and digging in, in complete silence. Roy wasn't even half done when Ed sat his bowl on the table and leaned back.

"My god Edward." Roy said picking up Ed's bowl only to find it completely empty.

"What? I was hungry, I forgot to eat this morning." Ed defended.

Roy shook his head and continued with his own bowl. After he was about finished he couldn't stand the feeling of being watched anymore, looking up he met Ed's bullion eyes. Ed's face reddened somewhat and he looked away.

After Roy finished Ed took a shower while Roy read over the newspaper.

"Hey Roy, do you have any scissors?" Ed asked.

Ed startled Roy, turning Roy saw Ed standing there, hair down with just a towel wrapped around his waist. He also saw Ed's thin form. He was gaining weight, but his ribs were still visible. Roy wanted to cry every time he was reminded about how poor Ed's physical state was, and Roy had cried over Ed's mental state. "Yeah, why?"

"I wanted to trim my hair."

Why don't you go some place and have it done?" Roy asked standing.

"I don't trust them, you tell them one inch they shave your head!" Ed over exaggerated.

"I agree, well you want me to do it?" Roy asked, "It's just an offer."

"Have you cut hair before?"

"Yeah, I cut my own."

Ed looked at Roy's hair, he always like roy's hair.

"Well…if you screw it up, you'll pay."

"Yes ma'am"  
"Shut up!"

"Come on we'll do this in the front room so we can both sit."

"Ok I'll be in, in a minute."

Roy grabbed the scissors and went into the front room and sat in the chair he was in earlier. Since the front room had no carpet he was all the more willing to do it in here. Ed returned wearing a t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants. Roy pointed at the footstool across the room, "Grab that I think you can sit on that and still be at a descent height, so you don't have to stand."

Ed nodded and drug it over in front of Roy and sat down.

"Did you bring a brush or comb, what ever you use?" Roy asked.

"Um…Yeah here." Ed had been fidgeting with it, but reluctantly handed it to Roy.

"Hey, now if you want to do this your self you can."

"No, it's fine."

"Ok," Roy ran the brush down Ed's semi dried hair, getting all the knots and tangles out, and then cut about an inch of it.

"How much was that?" Ed asked

"About an inch high, it's all dead."

"No higher." Ed said, hint of relief in his voice.

After Roy finished with the length of Ed's hair he sighed and leaned back. "Who is doing your bangs?"

Ed ran his flesh hand over his bangs, choppily cut. It wasn't easy to do. Running his hand over where Roy had already cut he smiled, "You did good, it's even.."

"I knew you didn't trust me." Roy smirked leaning forward. Ed turned looking at Roy over his shoulder. "I was curious weather you could do it. I will do my bangs, it's not easy."

"Whatever you say Ed." Roy handed Ed the scissors and leaned back in the chair lightly putting his hand on his bruised stomach. Ed looked at Roy's hand then Roy's eyes quickly leaving the room to finish his hair. Then he would talk to Roy about what he did.

Returning to the front room Ed saw Roy sweeping the hair off the floor. Roy hadn't noticed Ed standing in the doorway. Bending down and wincing Roy swept the hair into a dustpan. Standing up slowly Roy looked to see Ed standing there, eyes full of pain, sorrow, like he was silently begging for forgiveness. Walking in to the kitchen Roy dumped the contents of the dustpan into the trash. Walking up behind Edward he put his hand on his shoulder, "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, is the bruise worst?" Ed asked turning to Roy.

"Ed forget about it, like I said-" but Edward cut off Roy.

"How can I forget that I hurt you? Physically?"

"What does it matter Ed, its not a deadly injury it will heal!" Roy stressed, "Forget about it, please." Roy turned toward his room, but was stopped when a strong hand firmly gripped his arm.

"Why won't you accept my apology?"

Roy shook off Ed's hand, "Because it was my fault not yours! I got in the bed, I was holding you, I shouldn't have done it! I'm sorry, I am tired of this, Edward, it was a honest mistake! I don't remember getting in bed with you, and…it won't happen again." Roy trailed off.

Regret, and pain, loads of, all in Roy's eyes. "Roy,"

"Sorry Edward, I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Roy! You didn't hurt me I hurt you, I feel so bad about. I could have broken something, or killed you. I-I," Ed sighed. "I don't know."

"Stop apologizing," Roy said sadness in his tone, as he turned away again.

"What are you hiding, I was expecting a fight of some sort." Ed said, "Wait does this have to do with what was wrong with you in the car?"

"No," Roy turned prepared to angry eyes, but what he saw about killed him, pain, sorrow, and hope.

"Roy…should I leave? Is that what you want? I've been such a burden, you've missed work and-"

"Wait wait, I'm the one that forced you to stay, no I don't want you to leave, but I feel bad that I hurt you."

"I' hurt you! In more ways than one. And I can't stand it, I-"

"You're staying, I don't want you to leave." Roy said quietly.

"But I hurt,"

"I HURT YOU!" Roy said, "Edward just drop it!"

"I can't I care for you more than you know!" Ed's eyes widened, face reddened, and he slapped a hand over his mouth.

"What?"

"Nothing, nothing. I-I going to…bed."

"Edward, what are you hiding?" Roy smirked stepping a little closer but still leaving Ed room, "You care for me more than I know."

"I didn't, I mean I don't," Ed sighed, 'Roy knows now what do I have to loose, other than a roof over my head.' Ed stepped closer grabbing Roy pulling him toward himself capturing the other mans lips.

Roy's eyes widened from shock, then slowly closed, and he returned the kiss.

Ed's eyes snapped open when he felt the lips of Roy mustang move onto him, in return of the kiss, only to be closed again. Ed wrapped his arms around Roy's neck and Roy wrapped his around Ed waist. Roy bit at Ed's lip asking for entrance. Ed opened his mouth, and their tongues battled for dominance, roy finally wining, exploring the moist cavern, burning it into his memory, taking in the wonderfully taste that was Ed, with a hint of ramen.

Finally they broke gasping for breath, looking in each other's eyes, gold clashing with midnight blue, bullion with onyx.

The pain was gone from Ed's eyes; they were filled with joy from the moment they just shared. Roy knew Ed's soul and heart was still broken, hopefully Roy could help mind it.

Roy kissed Ed's forehead and pulled him close, "Tired?"

"Yeah," Ed said barely audible.

"Ok, you going to sleep in your room?" Roy asked, praying, even though he didn't believe that Ed would say no.

"Um…do I have to?"

"No, not at all. Let's go to bed." Roy said pulling away from Ed.

After they both dressed for bed, they climbed into Roy's bed. Ed laid down a few minutes before Roy, and was fighting a lose battle against sleep. He didn't even realize it when Roy got in bed with him. Ed startled slightly when Roy pulled him closer. Ed turned and buried his face in Roy's chest taking in the wonderful scent of vanilla soap and smoke.

Roy rested his head on Ed's taking in his unique scent of vanilla, oil, and metal. It was a sweet smell. Kissing Ed's head Roy whispered, "Goodnight Ed."

"Night Roy," Ed said sleepily.

Both falling asleep; minds at ease and smiles on their faces.

Thanks to VadMustang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Time for me to be mad!!!

WHY DID I ONLY GET !!!!!TWO!!! REVEIWS!

If I don't get more than that this story WILL be at a stand still!

Flames are welcome!


	18. You Ok Roy?

I got like 4 reviews…………….pathetic. I'm depressed; my writing must be horrible. I put so much time into this recently. I Freak making sure my parents never lay eyes on this and I get three reviews, whatever. Anyways! I never intended for this story to go over seven chapters. My original story plan would have probably pissed you all off. So For the few that reviewed; I will continue. But don't count on another one if I don't get a lot of reviews.

Chapter 18

Roy woke up and looked at the clock. 5 am. Sighing he rolled and pulled the sleeping form closer to him, receiving a sleepy moan. Smiling Roy ran his hand through Ed's hair affectively pulling it from the loose braid; Roy was still unsure of Ed's reasoning for braiding it before going to bed. Ed buried his face into Roy's chest and draped an arm over Roy's waist.

This moment in time brought great joy to his heart. Roy was happier than he had been in a while. That came to a screeching stop. Roy's face fell from the light smile, as he remembered the day, Monday, and on top of that the day Hughes died. Letting go of Edward, he rolled onto his other side, scooting away from Ed, just out of reach. Curled up in a makeshift ball, God how he missed that man. That bastard helped him through his depression and come away from suicide.

Roy lie there, mind blank.

Suddenly the clock caught his eye. '7:00 A.M'

Getting up he showered and changed. Roy slowly walked back into his room fully ready to leave for Headquarters: clearing his throat of any sadness, putting up an unbreakable wall of emotion. "Edward. Get up and get dressed we'll be leaving soon." Roy said loudly rubbing Ed's flesh arm.

"No," Ed said rolling away from Roy.

"Not in the mood for your games get up."

Ed lifted his head. He only had one eye open and looked confused. Sleepily he crawled out of bed and stood before Roy, "Sorry, Roy, I didn't mean too. I'll go get dressed."

Once Roy realized his mistake he quickly brought Ed into a tight embrace, "I'm sorry Ed. Please don't think anything of it if I snap at you today."

Ed timidly wrapped his arms around Roy, "Why?"

"…I don't feel the best." Roy stated.

Ed pulled away, "Ok sorry, I'm going to go dress."

"Don't be sorry."

As they walked into Roy's office Ed noticed everyone was quieter than usual, but pushed it to the back of his mind, it was Monday after all.

The day dragged on and on. Finally Roy announced everyone's dismissal, and then took his own with Ed. Walking down the halls of Central Ed finally caught a glance at Roy's eyes perfectly, he let his guard down for a spilt second and Ed saw pure pain, depression, and hidden tears.

Ed wanted to say something but took into consideration of them walking down the crowded halls of Central Headquarters.

The drive home was silent, making Ed uncomfortable. Ed went over it in his mind, 'Ok He's been in a piss poor mood, lying to me about what was wrong, and wouldn't talk to anyone unless it was necessary. He didn't eat lunch, just pushed it around on his plate. Something has to be wrong. Why won't he tell me?' Ed thought. Roy pulled into their driveway, and went in the house closing the door behind him.

Ed got out of the car and walked up to the house, feeling totally hurt. Entering the house, Ed spotted Roy walking into the front room. Ed went in the same direction. Roy was sitting in his usual spot on the small couch, military jacket unbuttoned and the first two buttons on his undershirt was undone.

"Roy?"

"Hm?" Roy grunted not looking away from the empty fireplace.

Sighing Ed walked up behind him and kissed the top of his head softly, "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Ed saw Roy tense at the question. "Please?"

"It's nothing important. Don't worry." Roy stated bluntly.

Ed tilted his head in confusion and came around to look Roy in the eye, "It must be to get you down like this, and how can I not worry?"

Roy looked at the crouching form in front of him. Ed's eyes full of hurt, concern, and wonder. Roy felt a pang in his chest realizing the pain he brought upon Edward. Roy sighed and leaned forward, "Ed, it's a really sore subject," Roy stated then became aware that Ed had told him so many hurtful things, and had so many breakdowns. Sighing again he fell back in the chair, "Ed, today is the anniversary of Maes' death."

Ed's eyes widened, he completely forgotten, "It's been about six years." Ed stated.

Hurt and tear stain onyx eyes dug deep into Ed's, "Ed you remember last night in the car?"

"Yeah," Ed answered standing and then sitting on the footstool in front of Roy.

"Well…I was thinking about my past a little."

"Yeah…wait, you two had a thing going…"

"You could say that, I suppose." Roy took a breath and blinked away some tears. "I know it's crazy, but, I don't know that you should know this Ed, I don't want to hurt you again."

"You didn't hurt me! What happened?" Ed asked quickly.

Roy could tell he couldn't get out of this, "Ed I fell in love with Maes. I knew he was bi, we had a small thing going, though we never dated because, well I really don't know why. After a year or more, I decided to tell him my true feelings." He searched Ed's eyes curiosity was all he could see, a sure sign to keep talking, "he obviously didn't return my feelings, he told me he was in love with Gracia, I was hurt. It's not like he told me rudely." Roy felt a tear run down his cheek, and he quickly wiped it away, "Amazingly we stayed best friends, then he died." Roy said his wall finally crumbling as he burst into tears. Putting his head in his hands, beginning to sob quietly. Ed sat down next to Roy on the couch and pulled him close in a supportive embrace, rubbing Roy's back, "Roy it's ok, don't worry about it." Ed felt Roy's arms wrap around him. "No it's not, Edward."

"Why wouldn't it be? I can't blame you for still loving him, you never stop loving your first true love weather they return it or not. I don't care that you still love him, not at all, I'm just glad you told me." Ed said hoping Roy would find it comfort in his words. Roy let out another sob. Ed didn't know what to say, he was at a lost for words. "Roy, it'll be ok, hey maybe you should talk about it, you might feel better. It only hurts while your talking but when you finish you feel so much better." Ed said slightly shaking Roy. Roy realized those were his own word mixed with Ed's. But talking was out of the picture, he didn't want to plain and simple. "Roy?"

"I-I Don't want to talk."

"You will in time." Ed told Roy. They sat like that for a few minutes more while Roy calmed somewhat. Roy resting his head on Ed's shoulder; and Ed on his head.

"You ok now?"

Roy shook his head but the tear that found it's way past Roy's eyelids, didn't go un-noticed by Edward. Ed pushed Roy off him gently and, with his flesh hand, wiped and caressed Roy's cheeks.

Roy leaned to Ed's touch. Ed's skin made him feel like he was engulfed in the very flames he was so well known for. He kissed Edward's palm then looked back at Ed, concern was still in Ed's eyes, but he tried to hide it with a smile.

"Stop worrying."

"I'm not." Ed snapped back removing his hand from Roy's face.

"And stop lying." Roy smirked at Ed's frustrated response.

"How'd you know?" Ed asked quietly.

"If I told you that would learn to cover it up."

"You hungry? You didn't eat lunch."

"Actually, no" Roy said falling back on the couch.

"Well, I'm going to eat, you're sure? I'll fix it."

"Edward, I'd love to try your cooking but I'm not hungry."

"Ok,"

Edward ate his dinner while Roy read the newspaper. Ed washed his plate and sat down to read a book. The book bored the blonde, finally giving up on it he looked at the time. 11:30 pm. Where had time gone? Looking over at Roy Ed couldn't help but smile. Roy fell asleep.

Ed stood and was going into the bathroom when the phone rang, waking up Roy.

Roy sleepily reached for the phone that sat on the table next to him, "Mustang."

"Roy, you doing ok?" a familiar voice asked on the other end,

"Riza? Yeah I'm fine." Roy said repositioning himself, and noticing Ed wasn't in sight.

"I thought I'd call and check on you, we were worried. You just weren't like this last year." Riza explained.

""Well I'm fine now, thanks for your concern. Tell Jean I said that." Roy said leaning forward looking into the kitchen not seeing Ed in there.

"How's Ed?" Apparently Riza didn't want to get off the phone just yet.

"He's fine," Roy sighed.

"He seems to be improving, that's a plus." She said with a smile.

"I still worry though." Roy said sitting back.

Ed left the bathroom, dressed for bed, and lay down on Roy's bed he could hear Roy talking but couldn't understand him.

"Worry? Why's that?"

"If anything bad happens in his life he is going to go down hill immediately. He was worse than we all thought." Roy said quietly.

"Worse how?"

"He was suicidal. Slit his wrists, you can see the scars."

"Have you talked-"

"He won't" Roy interrupted.

"Roy, you can get it out of him, I know you can. I'm going to let you go so you can talk to him. Good Bye" Riza said.

"Bye"

Roy hung up the phone and sighed, today just sucked, talking to Ed could wait until tomorrow night.

I WANT REVIEWS!!! AT LEAST 10! Good luck! I might not be updating at the rate you all are going! I have other things I can do! I do like writing this but If I'm not going to get reviews then why should I write?


	19. Insomniac

Chapter 19

Roy was awake, again. What's that make six or seven times that he has woke up now? Slowly opened his eyes only to see moonlight shining through the window. Sighing he slowly rolled on to his back. Clenching his teeth he rolled back over now fully wake from the contact of cold metal on his back.

Roy as only clad in pajama pants, he was burning alive before he went to sleep last night. Roy slowly got out of bed a drug around in his dresser drawer and put on a gray t-shirt and returned to bed. He didn't want Ed to see that bruise. Roy lay there, it was five in the morning, 'I'm growing tired of not sleeping properly. I haven't sense Ed's first night of staying with me. Why haven't I-'

Just as he thought that, Ed shivered in his sleep. Roy replaced the blankets on Ed , that had fallen around his waist.

Laying on his back staring at the ceiling Roy thought to himself. 'Today isn't going to go well. I don't want to talk to Ed about his…suicidal side. He's come so far in just…what has it been? Nine days. But I can see it in his eyes. His mental state is hanging by a thread. His physical state isn't any better I can count his fucking ribs and vertebras; he is gaining weight though.' Roy sighed and looked over at the sleeping blonde. 'He is still pale, eyes still dull. I don't know if it is wise to ask about let alone mention Alphonse. I couldn't stand to fall back down hill again.' Roy rolled onto his side his back to Ed, 'I can't believe I let myself fall apart yesterday, I still don't feel right.'

Roy lay there a while longer and fell back to sleep.

Ed woke up slowly, looking at the clock, six thirty. They needed to get up and shower then head to HQ. Ed rolled over and leaned over Roy. "Wake up," he said rubbing his arm. After trying that for a little bit Ed put his automail on Roy's neck, waking him, he rose up off the pillow with a hiss. "Sorry Roy, but you wouldn't wake."

"Mmm…" Roy said sleepily plopping back onto the pillow. "No, Roy we got to get our showers and leave."

"Wake me after you finish." Roy said pulling the blanket over his head.

"Fine," Ed said leaving the warmth of the bed.

Ed showered then quickly put on his clean boxers and pants, not bothering to dry off, let alone ring out his hair. Walking back into their room, Ed pulled the blankets off of Roy and ringed his hair out over the back of Roy's head.

"That's COLD!" Roy said sleepily starting of quiet, ending loudly, and yet never lifting his head off the now wet pillow.

"It's suppose to be, are you always this way?"

"Yep,' Roy said pulling the blanket up again.

Roy was lying on his back.

"Roy, you've got to wake up." Ed said rubbing his shoulder roughly.

Roy opened his deep midnight blue eyes, then rolled over and stared at the ceiling. "Roy get up." Ed repeated patting his arm.

Roy turned and gave Ed a questioning look, "Why?"

"Work perhaps." Ed had refrain from patting Roy's to caressing it.

"Oh…" Roy said still looking confused.

"You feeling better today?" Ed asked.

"About Maes, no it's unusual I feel better the day after." The sleep induced man said.

"Come on lets get you in the shower and some coffee in your stomach."

"No, no, no don't want to I'll get cold, I don't want to go." Roy said pulling away from Ed's hand and covering up.

"Are you hung over?" Ed asked seriously; he didn't like the way Roy was acting, it worried him.

"No, tired, stressed cold." Roy mumbled.

Ed sat down and gave Roy a tender kiss on the lips, slowly moving his lips against Roy's. Roy was a little shocked at Ed's forwardness, but was also very disappointed when Ed pulled away. Looking up at Ed, Roy smiled and propped himself on his elbows in an attempt to kiss the thin blonde in front of him. Ed stood up and smiled down at the now flustered General. "If you want another get a shower and get dressed." Ed smiled and walked out of the room pulling a t-shirt over his head on the way. Ed's back was healing nicely, almost completely. He was still pale and skinny though. Roy sighed and flopped down on the pillow, it was cold. Colder than usual, "Damnit, it's wet!" Roy said out loud giving up on sleep and heading to the shower.

Ed was in the kitchen looking for coffee. Ed sighed when he found it; barely out of Ed's reach, Ed stretched an arm up grabbing it and pulling it down. There was a little bottle on top of it that crashed onto the title floor. Sitting down the can of coffee, Edward bent down and picked up a small green bottle with a white label wrapped around it. Ther was approximately nine pills in it. The label read:

Central Pharmacy 

_Dr. J. Berrett_

_555-859-2135_

_Roy Mustang_

_Take one tablet by mouth before bed every night._

Ed raised an eyebrow. There other writing explaining the ingredients but that didn't help Ed find out what it was for. He didn't know anything about Roy having health problems. Ed sat the bottle down and made Roy a cup of coffee.

Roy walked into the kitchen and his nostrils were overwhelmed with the scent of coffee. Ed was standing drinking a glass of juice staring at something on the counter. Roy walked up behind him wrapped an arm around him, "You own me something."

Ed smiled and turned faced the now showered and fully dressed man. Ed wrapped his arms around Roy's neck and slowly pressed their lips together. Slowly massaging the others with his own, Ed licked at Roy's bottom lip asking for entrance. Their tongues fought for dominance, Ed finally losing. Roy's tongue gently explored the moist tasty cavern, Ed had defiantly been drinking orange juice and something else. Pulling apart Roy hugged Ed and let him go, "What all have you drank this morning?"

"This," Ed said holding up his glass of juice.

"You didn't like the coffee?" Roy smirked.

"No," Ed growled, "Hey, what's this?" Ed asked holding up the bottle of pills.

"Damn it, that's why I haven't slept good." Roy said taking them from Ed.

"What are they?"

"Sleeping pills. I'm insomniac, too much stress in my life style and the depression from the war fucked up my sleeping permanently."

"Is that why you wouldn't wake up?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that." Roy sat down the pills and picked up his coffee.

-+-+-+-+-++--+-+-+-++--+-+-+-+-+

The rest of the day was boring and drug on. Ed did some of Roy's paperwork during lunch while Mustang took a quick nap. After lunch everything went slow, resulting in an early return home.

When they walked into their house, Roy took off his military jacket and unbuttoned the first three buttons. And turned to Ed sadness staining his features.

"What's wrong, Roy?"

"We need to talk about something, but I don't want you to fall back down hill." Roy said grabbing Ed's hand and leading him into the bedroom.

"What could be so bad?"

"Your past" Roy said softly, looking down on now suddenly dull, pained, and depressed eyes. Roy cringed. He knew it was going to happen and they hadn't even talked yet, "Ed I'm sorry but we do need to talk." Roy put his arm around Ed as they sat on the bed.

"I don't want to, Roy, I just, I can't, I – I"

"Ed.."

"No I don't want to." Ed yelled standing and turning away. Roy grabbed his arm and looked into the same eyes as earlier only now there was anger, Roy felt is heart drop to the pit of his stomach, but this was something he needed to do.

Ooohh…cliffy just don't kill me.

I want lots of reviews pleases!!!


	20. Truth In Dreams

Chapter 20

Ed looked in Roy's eye not paying attention to what they held, then down at the hand around his thin arm. "I'm not, just no I don't want to talk about my past!"

Roy watched Ed's eyes they looked so bad right now, in every way possible. "Edward it's not like I want you start at your birth, calm down and-"

"Then what the hell are you talking about?! 'Tell me about your past' Then where?!" Ed was beginning to raise his voice, and jerked his arm hard trying to break away from Mustang. Roy's grip was fierce and he managed to keep his hold on Ed's arm, "Sit down please, Edward."

"No!"

"That's all you know how to say isn't it? Sit down and start with the funeral." Roy said lightly pulling on Ed's arm, still intently watching his eyes.

Images flashes intensively before Ed's eyes, nearly knocking him over, but it brought weakness in his wall that was holding back the pain he felt. Roy saw the pain and sadness flooding the golden irises. Roy pulled Ed back to the bed, "More time, Edward I'll Give you more time." Roy said wrapping his arms around Ed. Roy was sitting with his back against the headboard, Ed's back leaning on his chest, Ed leaned his head back suddenly feeling a little better, 'Maybe sleep would make me feel a little better?' Ed practically asked himself. He closed his eyes, he felt Roy put his chin on Ed's head. "Go to sleep Edward, we can try again when you wake up." Ed nodded his head in agreement before lightly dozing off. Roy watched Ed close his eyes and nod off to sleep. After about forty minutes he was sure Ed was headed for a few hour nap, soft snores escaping from his mouth, and his breathing was steady and smooth. Roy slowly shifted, not wanting to leave Ed's side he was calm in his sleep even if it was only a moment he loved it. Another few minutes passed and Roy felt his eyes getting heavy, getting comfortable he rested his head on the blonde on in front of him and let sleep take him over.

-----------------------

Ed sighed as he walked toward the cemetery; he was in his black suit and about 15 minutes early. He slowly made his way across to the open grave, passing the hearse quickly, stopping where the grave was, looking to the side Ed sighed again, "Mom I've lost everyone." He stood there staring to the headstone fidgeting with the flowers he held, pink carnation, striped carnation, and a dark crimson rose. Ed jumped in surprise when Winry and Pinanko Walked up behind him. "How you holding up?" Winry asked. Ed looked at her face blank, eyes pained. "Ed?"

"_Winry hush," Pinanko whisperer. "Just stay by his side, don't pry." People started coming up, Next to arrive, Mustang, 'Damn that bastard he cracks one fucking joke there will be a blade through his heart.' Ed thought hatefully. Ed watched Mustang walk up with Hawkeye behind him, "Edward, you doing ok?" Roy asked patting his shoulder quickly._

"_My only little brother is dead, how do you think I am?" Ed spat turning away from the grave to stand by Winry who was talking to Hawkeye. Ed didn't speak another word. Everyone that was invited showed up, and some others. The pastor showed up, Al had always believed even though he listened to his older bother countless times, ' there is no such time, false hope, a fairy tale.' Human transmutation had ultimately destroyed the Elric family. 'Step into God's territory, you'll regret your entire life, and thereafter.' Ed thought blaming and inwardly beating himself. _

_Everyone gathered in rows. Ed standing at the end of the row to the right, Winry to his left, Pinanko to hers, Riza, Roy, Havoc, and the numerous others in the back. Ed noted that the pastor looked at him almost constantly, he tried to pay attention for Al, but his mind would wander to Alphonse lying in that cramped casket. As the pastor preached Ed heard muffled sobs all around him. He glanced at Winry who was desperately holding back tears. Pinanko had a few, but she had to be strong. Riza was silently crying. Roy the smug bastard was looking at Edward. Ed looked back forward. The pastors last words were accompanied by men Edward didn't know carrying his baby brother to the grave and placing him in the ground. Winry broke, as did practically everyone else. Ed looked back down the front row. Winry and Pinanko were crying, Riza crying into Roy's shoulder, Roy even had a few tears of his own. Havoc was biting his lip and tear quietly made there way down his face. _

"_Every one starting in the back please pay your respects." The pastor announced. Everyone in the back row filed forward, the men shaking hands with Ed, and most of the women hugged. They all dropped there flowers or prayed. Ed watched Roy bow his head and whispered something and dropped a light pink rose and a withered white rose on Al's casket. 'Friendship and Death,' Ed thought reading the flowers._

_Ed dropped his pink carnation, "I'll never forget you," then the striped, "sorry I can't be with you," and last the dark crimson rose, "I'll always mourn you, baby brother, I love you so much." Ed whispered to his brother. _

_They went to Winry's for the dinner, after word. But Ed didn't attend it. Instead he sat at al's freshly covered grave, with a bottle of hard whiskey. "Al I'm so sorry I let this happen. You're my baby brother," Ed's voice broke, the whiskey working it magic. Ed sat there crying and talking Al until the bottle was empty and then he said goodbye and left. Ed wandered around, only to find him self in bed at Winry's the next morning._

_A few days later Ed headed back to Central back to the dorms. A day pasted and Ed couldn't stand the pain any more but refused to cry. He left into the slums of town, bought himself some liquor, and a pretty little needle. _

_Ed walked into his dorm took off his jacket and sat in the corner of the room. He took a few swigs of his newly obtained whiskey then sat mulling over in his mind what was he going to do with his life now? Ed decided to turn in his watch and do what he wants. Ed took off his belt and wrapped it tightly around his upper arm, then picked up the needle and syringe. He injected himself, slowly pulling out the needle he sat still, then pulled his belt off his arm and rolled his head back. _

_The next night went differently. No needle, all alcohol, and lots of it. Sunday all liquor stores and bars are closed and Ed is out of liquor. So instead of a needle, or a stiff drink he clapped his hand turning a single finger into a sharp point. He pressed down enough to draw blood, over and over again, then on last hard cut. Warm crimson flowing freely from his wrist. He grew cold and scared. He wanted to die, to join his brother, mother, and he even longed for his father. But the bleed stopped just as Ed passed out._

_Two days later Ed sober and covered up turned in his watch and fought with Roy._

"_You can't just quit!" Roy said._

"_Watch me." Ed said throwing the shiny sliver watch on Roy's desk and walked out flipping him off as he went. _

_Back to the slums to do it over again._

--------------------------

Ed stirred in his sleep, normally Roy would wake him but he decided to let things play out. When he wakes he'll be nervous and will talk easier. Truth lies in dreams.

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ok I want to thank you all for your review!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry if you don't like the way I'm dragging it out, but I see it necessary.

ALSO I got my info on the flowers from different websites. If you think it wrong I'm sorry! But I like the idea of it. Please don't chew my head off about the flowers . thank you.

Lot's of Reviews PLEASE!!!


	21. Never Too Late

Chapter 21

(Continued from Ed's Dream in chapter 20)

"_How much?" Ed asked the hooded figure on the slum sidewalk._

"_It one hundred, twenty dollars per gram." The hooded man said._

"_Well, I can get it cheap down the street…" Ed thought out loud._

"_Not any more you can't. She got her Dumbass busted." _

"_Oh…Well…"_

"_How big of hits you take?"_

"_About one tablespoon," Ed admitted._

"_Newcomer? Ok…want three hits worth that'll be…$5160"_

_Ed thought about it for a moment, "Here," Ed handed him the cash and took his dope._

"_Thanks for business kid." The man said thumbing though his cash._

"_I'm not a kid." Ed said walking away putting his drugs on the inside of his coat pocket. _

_Ed walked briskly back to his dorm room, there was a note pinned to his door._

Eviction Notice

Edward Elric, You are no longer a member of the State Military, We cannot allow you to stay in these dorms. You have four days.

"You have to be a damn dog to do other, and yet if your not on the General's leash you get thrown out like and unwelcome mutt." Ed crumpled the paper and walked in and packed a few bags full of clothes. Closing his last suitcase he took out his newly obtained drug. Ed made his dose and wrapped his belt around his arm and injection himself. Pulling the belt of he rested his head back against the wall.

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The area were Ed bought his dope got busted completely. After he recovered from his three days sicknesses of withdraw he bought a cheap apartment. Using the last of his money. So he sold all most everything he owned, then spent that on booze.

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Then after weeks of Mustang dragging him back home. Roy took the drunk blonde in.

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Ed woke with a start, sitting straight up; panting and sweating slightly. Ed was completely oblivious to the fact he was sitting in-between Roy's legs, and being watched be that same man. Ed sat there for a second and ran his hand down his face squeezing the bridge of his nose.

Roy kept quiet and observed Ed's actions. He arched a brow as Ed held out his arm and look at the underside of his arm before he leaned back on Roy's chest.

"Oh...shit I didn't know you were there!" Ed said as he started to sit up. Roy pulled him back and wrapped his arms around him, "You know Ed, I've decided it's time for me to talk and you listen. You've told me so much, and had so many breakdowns, and I'm not complaining." Roy said shifting himself and Ed to get more comfortable.

"you don't-"

"Yeah I do. I promised I would." Roy said, "When I was sixteen my mom committed suicide, no one knows why she seemed happy. She didn't do drugs or drink nothing. But one day I had been out with some friends. I came home and mom was out looking at the city, she was standing on our ledge that was I don't know twenty stories up. 'I'm so tired Roy I'm sorry.' She jumped me and dad saw he was about fifty feet away from where she hit." He took a breath and Ed looked up at him with apologetic eyes. He knew what it was like to lose your mother, but to suicide? "Dad lost his fucking mind," Roy continued, "I always hated the man. Bastard, mean son of a bitch. After three years in rehab, he followed mom's actions. I got accepted into the State at 21. Ishbal, hell. I have flashbacks. Still," Roy trailed off. That worried Ed, he rested his head on Roy. Roy feeling this came out of his daze and rested his cheek on Ed's golden locks. "I was ordered…to kill countless families." Roy fell silent again.

"Roy…" Ed said hoping to draw him back, but no response. Ed grabbed Roy's hand and intertwined their fingers. Roy noted how gentle and caring Ed was being before he continued, "I fell into a deep depression, took up drinking. And…" Roy's voice fell to a quiet, saddened, and shameful tone, "I had it in my mouth Ed."

Roy felt Ed tense, as he held back tears, now was not the time. But Edward pulled away from Roy, turned and pulled the older man into a tight embrace. "Roy, my god why didn't you tell me sooner?" Ed asked quietly into Roy's ear. Their cheeks were touching, and Ed could tell Roy was holding back his own breakdown from the quiver in his jaw. "Roy you know I'm always here for you, so please just let it out." Eds words touched Roy deep down, nearly, "I can't yet," Roy said strongly.

Ed wasn't surprised, he wasn't stupid Roy wanted Ed to talk. Ed moved beside Roy and leaned on him, his touch was comforting. "Where do you want me to start?"

"The day of the funeral." Roy said wrapping an arm around Ed.

"What about it?" Ed sighed.

"Edward…"

"Fine, well I went to the funeral left the flowers," Roy cut Ed off.

"What did you say to Al?"

"I'll never forget you, sorry I can't be with you, I'll always mourn you, baby brother, I love you so much." Ed said "it's what the flowers meant. After everyone left to Winry's I went off and found of bottle of whiskey, then went and talked to Al." Ed looked at Roy, his onyx eyes full of worry and guilt? "Roy, I don't want to talk about the rest. It's so bad." Ed grabbed the bend of his flesh arm.

"Try Ed."

"I…injected…"

"What? What was it?"

"…"

"Ed?" Roy was scared now though Ed had apparently kick the habit.

"I…," Ed stopped him self, "always bought it from the west till they all got busted. Then they kicked me out of the dorms."

"Edward, what did you inject?"

"…heroin."

"…" Roy's heart dropped into the deepest darks pit of Hell. "Oh Ed."

"I got scared then…" Ed trailed off.

"Come on Ed," Roy gently coaxed.

Ed only held out his wrist. Revealing his scars, he was wearing a blank t-shirt, that revealed his injection sites.

"When you cut it wasn't just because you were scared?"

Ed broke, "I miss all so damned much, then, still now, all I want is to see his face! Mom too." He cried.

"That's enough I've heard all I need." Roy said softly pulling Ed into a supportive hug.

"No you wanted to know it all. I drank and didn't heroin at the same time in hopes, then….they all got busted. So I drank heavily, then picked fights. Trying to get the shit kicked out of me, in hopes." Ed sobbed.

"It'll be alright. We'll get through it."

"I want to end it all, it's too late for me, the thoughts, everyday." Ed rambled.

"Enough, Ed, it's not to late it's never too late."

Hours pasted Ed cried himself to sleep. Roy changed himself then Ed. He held Ed as close and as tightly as he could without waking him. 'Ed I was almost too late.' Roy felt tears stream down his face at that thought. A soft sobbed escaped his lips, and his shoulders shook, waking Ed.

Ed took a moment to collect what was happening. He wrapped his arms around Roy, "I hurt you again."

"Ed if you every die on me…" Roy sobbed, "I couldn't handle it."

"I know, I'm the same with you."

They were like that a while longer then Ed lifted Roy's chin and brought their lips together quickly. But it wasn't enough for Roy; he needed more, to assure himself Ed was in the bed with him not just an illusion.

Roy brought Ed back; the kiss was deep, as Roy trusted his tongue into Ed's mouth. Burning the taste, feel, everything into his mind. He sucked at Ed's bottom lip as he pulled away. Roy ran his hand down Ed's bare side, over his hip, and down his thigh, Ed was clad in only his boxers as was Roy. Roy dove back for another passionate kiss, this time pushing the thin blonde and his back. Ed Brought his arms down roy's body after he was on his back and guided Roy to where he was directly hovering above Ed's form. Roy was getting unbelievably hard, as was Ed. Roy's hand glided down Ed's side and played with the waistband of Edward's boxers. Running his fingers under it lightly touching the skin. "Unh…" Ed moaned into Roy's mouth as he arched his back. Roy left Ed mouth and attacked his ear, nibble and sucking at the lobe. Kissing and nipping a trail to Ed's boxers, and looked up at Ed.

Ed's eyes were full of lust and passion, as he nodded.

Roy slowly slipped Ed's boxers off and teased the sensitive skin around Ed's throbbing erection. Roy licked the underside of Ed's shaft and took the head in his mouth and flicked his tongue over the slit. Ed moaned and bucked to gain friction Roy held down Ed's hips as he slowly took Ed's length in his mouth, slowly bobbing his head, and swirling his tongue. Hearing Ed's moans was almost enough to push him over the edge. Ed screamed out Roy's name as he came into Roy's mouth. That scream didn't just push Roy over the edge it violently threw him over, as he lapped up Ed's seed. That had never happened to Roy before, not even with Maes. He always needed his own turn, or at least his own hand. It surprised Roy. He fell beside Ed and pulled him close, running his hand silently down Ed's body. There was no need for words they knew it was going to be alright. Until Roy's hand brushed over Ed's upper thigh…

Yes I used the lyrics from Three Days Grace – Never Too Late

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	22. Sense It

Chapter 22

_There was no need for words, they both knew every thing was going to be alright. Until Roy's hand brushed over Ed's upper thigh…._

Roy's hand brushed over Ed's upper thigh, it felt rough and raised, like scabs. Roy also noted Ed tensed. Roy untangled himself from Ed and got up.

"Where are you going?" Ed asked propping himself up.

"Clean up before I get nasty." Roy said.

"Oh…" Ed figured he was talking about the mess in Roy's boxers.

Roy went into the bathroom removing his boxers and cleaning himself off and putting on a clean pair. Roy slowly walked into their room. Ed was still laying in bed, though now lower half of his body covered by blankets. Roy sighed and flipped on the lights.

"Ow, shit. Why'd you turn on the light?" Ed asked irritation dripping from his tongue.

"Edward, calm down. I just want it on for a minute." Roy said walking over and sitting beside Edward, reaching out and resting his hand on Ed's shoulder.

"Why?"

Roy didn't answer, instead he ran his hand down Ed's automail.

"I can't feel that, Roy." Ed said quietly turning his head away. Roy looked up at Ed's eyes," Your still self conscience about it?"

"I guess," Ed said not looking up.

Roy stopped and dropped his hand, only to raise his other onto Ed's side, "Can you feel that?" Roy asked. Moving his hand slowly down Ed's side.

"Um…yeah." Ed said, he knew Roy wasn't just trying to seduce him, more like a comforting touch, and something else. Roy's hand traveled further south, Ed grabbed Roy's wrist, "I'm tired."

"No your not…" Roy got a few inches lower, "what's wrong? You look nervous. You sure as hell didn't seem to be earlier."

"I'm just tired, Roy." Ed lied.

"Stop lying." Roy moved his hand down and grabbed a hold of the blankets and pulled them back, quickly but not violently.

"Roy!"

Ed still hadn't put his boxers back on letting Roy see exactly what he wanted. Ed slapped his hand over his thigh, failing at his attempt to cover what was there.

"Ed, when did you do that?" Roy asked pulling his hand away and talking in a kind manner. Ed didn't budge or speak. "Edward just tell me I'm not going to yell or lecture you," Roy promised, pulling Ed's hand away gently and rubbing his thumb over the many cuts. "These scars, their old. Ed how long have you cut?"

"I don't know, since I fourteen or fifteen." Ed admitting quietly.

"What am I going too do with you Ed? Just don't do it again, please?" Roy asked.

"Yeah, I'll try." Ed said truthfully.

Roy smiled and climbed under the covers, "It's a start. You're starting to look a lot better Ed. Seriously. The color in your face is returning." Roy really wanted to talk to Ed more about this but, that could wait awhile and see what happened.

Ed stood and slipped his boxers back on. "Thanks, I haven't really thought about it but I suppose I'm feeling better." Ed stated climbing into bed. Roy pulled him close and embraced him tightly. Running his hand down Ed's side Roy smiled again and lightly kissed Ed's head, "I'm glad to see you gaining weight. And that your finally being more open."

"thanks, and for telling me about your own past. Even though you didn't have to." Ed said, before yawning.

"I had too. Go to sleep." Roy said, running his fingers through Ed's hair pulling it out of it's braid.

"Why'd you that?" Ed asked reaching back behind his head grabbing for the hair tie Roy held captive.

"Why do you braid it before bed?" Roy asked while slipping Ed's hair tie around his wrist.

"It tangles then I spend like fifteen minutes brushing it and it makes me feel like a woman. Now put it back up, please."

"I like it down."

Ed's face reddened at that, "Oh…" Ed made one last grab for his hair tie before sighing and laying his head on Roy's chest, "I'm to tired for your shit, goodnight."

Roy chuckled and ran his hand through Ed's hair, "'Night Ed."

"No, no, wait…you take your medicine?" Ed asked sitting up.

"Shit, no, Damnit." Roy complained standing and walking into the kitchen. Ed rolled over, his back toward were Roy had lay. Ed drifted off into a light doze.

Roy walked back into the room, and flipped the light of and noticed Ed didn't move when he did. He quietly walked over and snuck into bed.

"Roy…"

"Yeah?"

"I'm cold." Ed mumbled.

Roy felt Ed roll over and face him, and Roy turned. "What do you want me to do about it?" Roy smirked.

Ed sighed and buried his face in the pillow, "Nothing."

"Come here." Roy said placing his hand on Ed's hip. He was cool to the touch. "Why are you so cold?"

Ed snuggled up comfortably to Roy, "My damned auto mail. If it's hot I'm hot, if it's cold I'm cold."

"You really hate those don't you?" Roy asked then yawned.

Ed yawned himself, "Yeah it's not as "cool" as it lets on. The hurt like hell make my joints ache."

"Really, well I guess it could be worse.."

"Yeah I could either not have and arm or a leg or have those stupid, halfed ass things dad made." Ed yawned again.

"Well Ed I hate to say this, especially because this is a good conversation for once, but I can feel the effects of my meds kicking in and your tired to lets just go to sleep."

"Good idea," Ed said looking up. Roy stole a quick kiss from Ed and pulled the covers up around them, and held Ed close.

"Auto mail does have…it's perks…" Ed said as he drifted. Soon they were both in a deep sleep.

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Edward was woken up by the sound of the phone ringing. Ed was still intertwined with Roy though throughout the night they managed to change position a little. "Roy, the phone." Ed said sleepily. Roy didn't stir. "Don't jump up I'll get." Ed said irritably. He stood and walked to the phone, "Hello?"

"Edward?" A female voice said on the other end.

"Riza?" Ed asked.

"Edward, is Roy around?"

"Um…he is still asleep." Ed explained, "Why?"

"Well Ed he is about two and a half hours late." Riza stated matter of factly.

"Wh-What?" Ed looked at the nearest clock, 10:10, "Damnit, I'll go wake him."

"Ed? Roy never sleeps this late is he sick?" Riza asked.

"Honestly I'm not sure, he hasn't been sleeping well. I'm going to go and wake him, bye." Ed hung up the phone and hurried into the bedroom. "Roy. Wake up. You're late!" Ed said pulling Roy's uniform out of the dresser. Looking over Roy had turned on his side away from Ed. "Coffee," Ed thought out loud. Ed quickly made up some coffee and was headed back up to their room and he realized something. "Son of a bicth," Ed said sitting down the cup of coffee and picking up Roy's medicine and read over the label again, "Allow six to eight of sleep before becoming active." Ed read out loud. "Defiantly hasn't been that long." Ed said out loud picking up the coffee and walking back in the room.

Ed walked in and sat the coffee on the bedside table. "Roy, you have to wake up," Ed said pulling the blankets down. In his sleep, Roy reached out for the blankets grabbing Ed's flesh arm. Pulling at Ed's arm and scooting over on the bed. "No Roy wake up," Ed said grabbing Roy's wrist and pulling him into sitting position. Roy opened his eyes and looked at Ed, then Roy closed his eyes and his head dropped and he started falling back. "Roy, Roy, Roy, no wake up." Ed said pulling him back up, only Roy fell forward. Ed braced Roy with his flesh hand, "Ed…ward…what…wrong…" Roy asked about half conscience. Ed sighed, "Roy wake up."

"I…wake" Roy mumbled, and opened his eyes.

"Keep your eyes open Roy." Ed coaxed.

"Tired," Roy said lifting his head a little.

"Your late for work?"

"How..late?" Roy asked.

Ed could sense that Roy was waking up more now, "Two and a half hours."

"What?!" Roy said then yawned. "Call me in sick, I'm too tired." Roy said falling back into bed. Ed touched his own cheek with the back of his automail hand, it was cold as ice. Ed put his automail on Roy's lower stomach. Roy jumped up with a hiss. "Drink this," Ed said handing Roy the coffee.

"I just want to go back to sleep," Roy said taking the cup.

"Do you remember our conversation we just had?" Ed asked.

Roy yawned, "We had a conversation?"

"Yes, your really late to work." Ed re-informed Roy.

"Late? How late?" Roy asked sitting up.

"Oh only two and half hours."

"…….Only" Roy stood quickly yawning in the process. Roy quickly washed up and dressed. After refilling his coffee he turned and saw Ed walking in and braiding his hair.

"You should leave it down." Roy said turning and reaching for his keys.

"No and No." Ed said.

"And?" Roy yawn.

"You can't drive."

"Sure I can…" Roy said a little unsure of himself

"Let me drive," Ed offered walking a little closer.

"You have a license?" Roy asked sitting his cup down and turning to face Ed.

"Nope," Ed said, as Roy put his keys in his pocket.

"We don't have time for this Ed, I got to get to work." Roy said pulling on Ed's arm drawing him in for a kiss. Roy lightly put his lips on Ed's. Ed pulled Roy closer by the pockets of his pants, putting two fingers into each and pulling him close. Roy immediately wrapped his arms around Ed's slim form. Ed caressed Roy's sides. Roy pulled their lips apart still had his arms securely around the younger. "I still think I should call in sick," Roy said, massaging Ed's back.

"You don't need to miss any work Roy," Ed explained, running his hand slowly back down Roy's side. Roy thought on it for a second then realized, he had told Ed they would visit Alphonse as soon as he got his days back. "Ok, then we better leave," Roy said pulling back again.

"Wait," Ed pulled Roy into a tight embrace, Roy returning it completely, taking in Ed's unique scent. Ed slipped his two fingers back into Roy's pocket and pulled out Roy's keys, quietly. Roy pulled back and looked at Ed, Ed had a smile on his face, like he was proud of something.

"Ok! Lets go," Ed said taking off out the door and headed straight for the car. Roy walked out of the house with a yawn, and reached for his keys, only meeting empty space. Roy looked up at the car to see it running, and a smiling blonde sitting in the drivers set, arm resting over the passenger set. Roy saw that smile that could warm any heart, a true smile, proving Ed was proud of himself for whatever reason. Although Roy didn't like the idea of a non licensed driver driving, his car with him in it none the less, Roy would have to allow it just this once. It proved something to Roy. It proved Edward actually cared for him, but Ed could also be worried for his own life, 'Yeah I wish that was it.' Roy thought sitting in the passenger seat.

"No, 'get your ass in the other seat?" Ed asked turning and putting the car in gear.

"Just obey all the laws you get caught I'll lose my license and lord only knows what else." Roy said.

"I know how to drive Roy." Ed said pulling onto the road.

Ed hadn't lied, amazingly he was doing pretty good, "When did you ever drive?" Roy asked.

"In Germany. Alphons taught me the basics and I taught my self from there." Ed said taking one hand from the steering wheel laying it on his lap.

"Who?"

"Alphons Heiderich, I lived with him while I was there."

"He must've had a good heart, to pick up a stranger from the street." Roy said.

"Yeah, he was, he had a pure heart." Ed said quietly.

"Oh…I'm sorry." Roy said catching Ed's word choice. "I didn't know."

"No one does." Ed said.

"What happened?"

"He got murdered for helping me." Ed said. "But he wouldn't be alive right now anyway though, he coughed all the time. Then he started coughing up blood. He didn't have much longer."

'It's no wonder he is so messed up.' Roy thought. He looked over at Ed. Edward caught him looking and smiled, "Enough of my depressing life," Ed said, "tell me some thing about yourself."

"Like what?" Roy asked reaching over and grabbed Ed's hand.

"I can't feel it." Ed said. Referring to the fact Roy had his automail in his hand.

"But you can sense it can't you? That's all that matters, not feeling, just sensing our enemy is behind you can save your life or some one else's. And sensing that the person you care most for is by your side through thick and thin. A blind person can't see a person smile or cry, they sense it. The deaf can't hear someone walk up behind them-"

"They sense it," Ed finished.

"Just like you can sense my touch correct? You know it's there even through you can't feel it with your skin.." Roy explained while Ed parked the car letting go of Roy's hand to do so. Ed turned and looked at Roy, waiting for him to finish. "You can't physically feel something but," Roy picked up Ed's hand and turning it over palm up, "you can see it, hear it, and sense it for that you should be thankful. Not embarrassed. Your automail is unique. And personally I think silver," Roy kissed the palm of Ed's hand, "is a perfect color for you." Roy quickly got out of the car hoping no one saw what he had done, but he also found himself not caring.

Ed stood up closing the door behind him and walked up to Roy, "But how could," Ed searched for words quickly as they passed several military personnel, "you like them cold like that?" Ed asked hoping they either wouldn't hear or that they would take it a certain way. Roy pushed Ed in to a gap in-between the buildings, it was small and shadowy but Ed also saw that it lead straight to Roy's office. Ed gasped in shock when Roy grabbed Ed's arm, turned him around and pushed him up against the wall, "They may be cold, but they make me hot." Roy said in a hushed tone and took possession of Ed's mouth, trusting his tongue in the deliciously moist cavern that tasted of toothpaste and of Edward. The taste Roy loved the most in this world. Roy forced himself away from Ed.

"Your being risky today, and personally I like it, a lot." Ed said then turned away from Roy leaving him speechless. 'So you like taking risks. And not just when your out on a mission. Roy thought, 'I can live with that'

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Roy walked into his office for the fourth time that day with a yawn. Ed was the only other one in the room. He was sitting on the couch staring out the window. "What's wrong Ed?"

"Huh? Oh nothing, some jackass popped his head in here and left some papers on your desk."

"Thanks," Roy said shaking his head. 'Two different order files?' Roy thought. The first was orders to stay over since he was so late. Which surprised Roy, he was expecting punishment. The second made Roy's stomach churn. Orders to a weeks leave to a city outside of Dublith called Burmson. It's about an hour train ride from Dublith. He was ordered to leave in a two days with four other officers.

The last line is what about killed him, 'You are ordered to come alone, this mission isn't for anyone outside of the military or your group and the other two groups joining you. Your group will be assigned to you tomorrow, feel free to tell anyone about your leave but not the conditions.' Roy sighed this wasn't good, Ed was staring at him, "Roy? You ok?"

"Yeah, Ed."

Roy started to read the conditions. 'Multiple car explosions thought to be a terrorist threat, you are to help the two investigation squads. The explosions have always been as the vehicle is in motion, be on guard at all times.'

Roy sighed.

Ed wasn't ready for this and he knew Ed wouldn't stay with some one else. He could hear the rant already, the I don't need a babysitter rant.

The thought of leaving Ed didn't settle with him. If something happened to him while he was out on this assignment, or if Ed misunderstood something, a chill ran down Roy's spine, nothing good would come of it for Ed.

Three hours left then he could go home, and bare more bad news on Edward, it sickened Roy, straight to the core.

I Just made up the town, so I thought I'd just let you know!!! REVIEW!!!!!!


	23. Leaving

Chapter 23

"Roy Mustang, Flame Alchemist, you're assigned to help the investigation squad in Burmson, correct?" Brigadier General Dean Davidson asked in an irritating business like tone.

"Yes sir." Roy reply standing stalk still, back straight, not allowing his anger towards this man to slip through.

"Well then Mustang, I assume you are here for the list of subordinates." Brigadier General stated.

"Yes sir," Roy answered.

"Here, gather up your men and tell him what's going on. I'll see tomorrow morning. You're Dismissed." The Brigadier General said handing him the paper and waved his hand in signal for him to leave.

"Yes sir, Thank you Sir," Roy saluted and left the room back to his own office.

Roy walked into his office with a sigh and threw down the papers and sat behind his desk, "What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing I can tell you about here Ed." Roy said as he crossed his arms over his desk and laid his head on them. Ed looked around; they were the only two in the room. Ed stood from the couch and closed the door. Roy looked up, "What are you doing?" Roy asked.

"Does this have anything to do with last night?" Ed asked.

"What do you mean late night? Nothing happened." Roy said sitting up straighter.

"Not like that, you acted as though you were never going to see me again, we stayed in the bedroom all night." Ed stated walking over and standing in front of Roy's desk, "you barely let me go out of you sight long enough to go to the bathroom."

"You're over exaggerating." Roy said standing.

"Hardly, what are you hiding from me?" Ed asked defensively.

"Ed calm down, don't take it offensive. I'll explain it when we get home. Ok?" Roy said walking around his desk and leaned against the front of it.

"Whatever," Ed said looking away, then turning toward the couch.

"Hey, Risk Taker, come here." Roy said with a sly smirk on his face. Ed stopped and looked over his shoulder at Roy, "With that smirk on your face, I don't know." Ed said sarcastically, turning around to face Roy but not stepping toward him.

"Just come here." Roy said holding out his hand. Reached out taking Roy's hand. Roy was surprised to feel the hardness of automail under his glove. A smile broke through Roy's lips as he pulled Edward toward himself, and placing his hands on Ed's hips. Ed pushed his leg in-between Roy's and stepped forward, Roy's arms tightened around Ed's waist. Roy scooted forward some and captured Ed's lips in a gentle kiss. Ed made a move to deepen it but Roy pulled back. Roy looked at the younger blonde disappointment and confusion plastered across his face. "Any other time it would've went in the direction your aiming for, but I have orders."

"Oh, is there anything I can do to help?" Ed asked leaning on Roy a little, Roy's hands traveled up to Ed's shoulder blades brushing over the steel plate of Ed's automail port.

"Be here, with food when I get back?" Roy asked.

"I can do that is you give me a time." Ed said tightening his embrace on Roy then pulling away slightly.

"I have to track down and prep four people for a mission." Roy said.

"Wait, I always had to come to you!" Ed said pulling away.

"That's because you're so hard to find. You hide from the world." Roy said pulling Ed back for a quick kiss then standing and exited the room.

Ed sat down, 'He had to prep four people, that's different." Ed thought looking over at Roy's desk. 'He took the papers he walked in with, with him. He is a smart one I have to admit that.' Ed thought then stood and took off for the library. Ed walked into the library, sadly the usual girl that was in there wasn't there today that meant trouble getting in and he didn't know where Roy was. "Sir I haven't seen you around here before, I need to see some proof you worry for the military." The squeaky brunette said from behind the desk.

"Well, ya see there lies the problem sweetheart, I was with the military but I dropped out. And I have permission from General Roy Mustang to come here and read as much and whatever I please."

She smiled, "I'm sorry…"

"Edward Elric" Ed answered.

"Edward, wait hold on." She busied her self looking through files. "Ah, here it is. Looks like you do have permission."

Ed smiled, "See I'm not a liar."

"I never thought you were, looks like the General really wants you to have your freedom in here." she said.

"Yeah," Ed said quickly, "Well, I'm going to go now." Ed turned and head to the corner of the library grabbing a few books in the process.

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Roy had gathered up his four comrades per say, and drug them to his office, knowing Ed was in the liberty.

"Jean Havoc, Maria Ross, Vato Falman, and Alex Louis Armstrong. We all have orders to leave tomorrow morning for Burmson." Roy said to each of the four in front of him.

"Whoa, wait, boss did you choose us?" Jean asked interrupting and aggravating Roy.

"No, Havoc, I had an ordered list. If I had a choice I wouldn't be doing this." Roy said, "Now we have strict conditions to follow. We and by we I mean us five, are the only ones that can come on this missions, meaning, Havoc, no you can't bring any one."

"Why'd you pick my name?" Jean asked.

"Because knowing you, you would have asked." Roy explained, "We cannot talk about this mission to any one out side of us five or the other to squad we will be joining. Are you guys keeping up so far?"

"Yes Sir." They all said in unison.

"Good, now, we're going to assist the two investigation squads. They are looking into the multiple car explosions in Burmson. Each explosion has happened when the car was in motion. Which means watch your back or die."

"Die, nice catch boss that makes me feel safe." Jean said.

"Shut up Havoc, I don't want to do this either. Now there is going to be three squad including ours as your well aware, INV number one is number," Roy looked at the paper and read from it, "330, INV number 2 320, and our squad is 310.We clear?"

"Sir," They said.

"Now, we all each have our own number, remember it! Havoc, 099, Ross 100, Falman 102, and I'm 103. Remember everyone's number that's the name you'll use over the radio, clear?"

"Yes sir."

"Questions?"

"No sir."

"Alright, be here on time and 7 o'clock tomorrow morning. Feel free to notify anyone of your leave, but under no circumstances are you to tell them the conditions. Dismissed."

"Sir," They saluted and left. He sighed and sat down squeezing the bridge of his nose before standing and making the long trek to the restroom. Walking silently down the halls Roy spotted a blonde holding to small containers walking in his direction. Roy looked over his shoulder and saw the two others turn into an office and close their door. He looked past Ed and saw no one, then smirked. Ed saw Roy look over his shoulder and past him, then smirk, that couldn't be good. Roy walked up too Ed not looking at him, then before Ed got out of reach Roy groped his ass, ultimately Ed nearly jumped out of his skin and gasping in shock. By the time he turned to Roy all he saw of the man was the flick of his uniform.

When Roy walked into his office, the smile on his face slowly faded as he saw Maria Ross standing in front of the window and Ed didn't so much as look up from his food when he walked in.

"Miss Ross, can I help you?" Roy said in business like tone.

She startled and turn with a salute, Ed just continued eating. "Sir, I had a question."

"Detailed?" Roy asked motioning at Ed.

"No sir, why such early notice?" asked hoping he didn't care.

"Honestly I don't understand why they didn't inform me earlier, it would have been-"Roy was interrupted by Ed dropping his chopsticks loudly and walking out of the room. "Nice if they would've informed me earlier."

"If you don't mind me asking, when were you told?" Ross asked politely.

"Yesterday evening, but they didn't give me the list of people until about 20 minutes before I rallied you four up. Sorry Miss Ross but if you have no further questions, your dismissed." Roy said quickly wanting to follow after Edward.

"Yes sir, thank you Sir," she saluted then left.

'That was pointless,' Roy thought following her out the door and looked in the opposite direction she walked in, seeing Ed turning the corner. He walked quickly in his direction. "Edward." Roy said when he turned the corner. Ed looked over his shoulder at Roy. "Come with me," Roy said looking into Ed's eyes. Anger flashed through Ed's eyes. But he obliged. When they got about ten feet from the office door Roy put his hand on Ed's upper back, feeling the automail port on his wrist, steering him into his office. Ed escaped from Roy's hand and sat back in front of his food pushing Roy's across the table.

"What's the matter with you Ed?" Roy asked sitting across from him.

"I just don't necessarily enjoy being left in the dark about things going on in your life." Ed explained.

"Ed," Roy sighed, "All I can tell you for time being," Roy whispered then brought his voice back, "is that I'm going out on a weeks leave tomorrow." Roy admitted.

"And you're telling me this now, why?" Ed asked defensively.

"Ed, calm down you don't have to take it as an offensive," Roy said.

"You found this out last night right we didn't you tell me then?" Ed snapped.

"Because Edward, I don't like you in this mood and if I told you last night you would have be like this until the day I got back!" Roy shot.

"I might not have! Damn it Roy who were you thinking about?!" Ed asked standing.

Roy stood, "Mainly you, you're the only one that went through my head. The First thing the went through my head was, 'Ed's not ready for this, and he's going to stay alone, what if something happens when I'm not there?' Damn you Ed I'm not as selfish as everyone thinks I am!"

"Then why couldn't you tell me sooner Roy, why hide it?" Ed asked turning away.

"Because, Ed, you would be in a mood, and your moods aren't that much fun." Roy said softly.

"I'll just come with you." Ed suggested turning back.

Roy looked down and shook his head, "You can't I was ordered to come alone, it's too dangerous to bring anyone, Ed I'm sorry."

"When can we go home, Roy?" Ed asked staring at the floor, talking in a hushed tone.

Roy looked at the clock, I can clock out early and serve extra hours when I get back." Roy said, picking up there food and putting it in a bag. Ed nodded and took over bagging their food while Roy made a phone call.

"Yes sir? Riza answered on the other end.

"I'm leaving, I'll make up my hours later." Roy said quickly.

"Ok, you have to give me a reason, sorry I have to fill out a report." She stated apologetically.

Roy looked at Ed whom was standing beside the couch staring aimlessly at the floor. "Personal reasons. I swear I'll be here for my leave tomorrow. Good bye Hawkeye." Roy hung up the phone, grabbed his keys, and walked over to Ed. "Let's go, come on." Roy said softly putting his hand on Ed's upper back and picking up their dinner with his other. They walked through the halls of HQ like that, not giving a shit who saw, or who thought what.

Roy drove home, they had been in the car for a few minutes and Ed reached over and grabbed Roy's hand. Roy intertwined their fingers, squeezing and playing with Ed's smaller fingers. They stayed like that until Roy needed his hand to park.

Once in the house Ed turned toward Roy.

"Where do you want to talk Ed?" Roy asked sitting his keys down and pulling Ed into the kitchen with him while he put the food that probably would end up in the trash, in the refrigerator.

"Bedroom, living room, I don't give a shit." Ed said in monotone.

'Bedroom? You said it first is that where you truly want to go?" Roy asked rubbing Ed's arm.

"Yeah…" Ed said looking down at the floor. Roy steered Ed to the bedroom. Where they removed their shoes. Ed sat on the foot of the bed, while Roy stood in front of him, "What are your conditions?"

"I'm not suppose to tell you keep that in mind," Roy said, "I have to go to Burmson. I'm helping them investigate car explosions. Three squads are going. Two investigation squads, the first there code number is 330 the second is 320, and mine is 310. That is also our car number." Ed inwardly flinched at the number.

"We each have our own number, I only know my squads so far. Jean is 099, Maria is 100, Armstrong 101, Falman 102, and I'm 103. The cars are always in motion when the explosions take place." Roy finished with a sigh.

"I don't like your number." Ed said looking up at Roy. Roy only raised an eyebrow in response. "Have you ever looked in my pocket watch?" Ed asked.

"No, it held something you didn't want anyone to see and I respected that, but if you want I can look." Roy said.

"You can?" Ed asked.

"Yeah, I'm not completely sire why but I kept your watch." Roy walked over and pulled it out of his bedside table drawer. 'Don't forget Oct. 3'

"What happened then?" Roy asked closing it and putting it back in the drawer.

"I burnt my house and left." Ed said, climbing up in bed laying face down in a pillow.

"Ed, I'm sorry I can't get out of this mission. You know I would if I could." Roy said climbing into bed next to Edward putting an arm over him. "I know Roy, I know." Ed said into the pillow.

"You won't stay with Riza will you?" Roy asked.

"I don't need a babysitter I can take care of myself." Ed snapped pulling his head out of the pillow.

"Ok I was just asking." Roy said, "I'm going to change out of my uniform."

"Ok" Ed said as he feel back into the pillow. Ed heard Roy leave. 'I don't want him to leave. What if…' Ed couldn't finish the thought. He felt tears sting his eyes as he buried his face deeper into the pillow, his shoulders started to shake as he started crying, 'Why am I acting this way? Why does it hurt so bad to think about not seeing him for a week?' Ed thought, 'I can understand crying over the thought of him…' Ed couldn't finish instead he sobbed into the pillow.

Roy walked in to see Ed's shaking form, Roy's mind went blank this wasn't what he expected. He walked over to Ed and picked him up off the bed holding him close. "It's all going to be fine Edward, I promise."

"Don't make a promise you can't keep." Ed managed between sobs. Roy was finding it difficult to hold back his own tears at this point. Ed nuzzled Roy's neck, "You saved my life, and I won't be there if you need me, how could I live with that?" Ed asked. Roy's jaw trembled.

"You're a strong man Edward, you really are if you want to be. Nothing is going to happen to me this time. But if and when it does, I want to be strong, don't do anything crazy Ed. I couldn't rest peacefully." Roy said, turning his head to Ed's closing his eyes tight trying to force his tears back.

"You can cry to Roy, you can cry too." Ed said squeezing Roy some letting another sob escape his lips.

"You need support-"

"You could die!! Damn it Roy, you should be scared!" Ed exclaimed into Roy's neck.

"I know Ed and I am, but you need me right now," Roy said a tear finding it's way down his face.

"And you need me too, why won't you ever cry? It's not fun but sometimes you need to." Ed pulled his face back and look Roy in the eyes, those deep onyx eye's he knew, was tear filled and it was only the second time Ed ever witnessed it. "See, let it out, Roy you need to I'm here for you like you're here for me. Plus I feel stupid crying all the time." Ed said his tears still flowing. Roy looked away for a second, then pulled Ed back, "Edward, your word cut me deep," Roy's voice broke as a sob escaped his lips. Ed squeezed Roy again. They sat like that for a while longer until Roy calmed and pulled away. Ed's eyes were free of tears unlike Roy's cheeks. Ed wiped Roy's cheeks dry and kissed him quickly on the lips, "You hungry, Roy?" Ed asked.

"Yeah."

Ed stood and went into the kitchen and brought the bag of food in. they ate the cold food in silence. Once Roy finished he spoke, "Is it normal for food to taste the same weather it's cold or warm?"

"I don't think so." Ed said as he picked up there trash and went into the kitchen. While he was in there he got Roy a cup of water and his medicine. When he walked back into their room Roy was laying down, "Roy take this you have to get up early, I'm going to shower tonight." Ed said handing Roy the water and pill.

Roy sighed but obliged Ed.

Ed showered and scrubbed his hair with a towel getting it as dry as possible, then brushed it forever before giving up and going into the bedroom. Roy was asleep clad in his boxers and the covers kicked off him. Ed sat on the bed and pulled the covers up on Roy and lay down close to him, not touching him though in fear that the meds hadn't taken full effect and his cold body would wake Roy. As Ed covered Roy stirred waking up long enough to pull Ed close, kiss his forehead and say, "You left your hair down, I love it that way." and ran his hand through it. "You're cold again."

"It's my automail."

"I know you hate it but I love it." Roy said pulling Ed closer tensing and the ice cold metal touched his skin.

"I know Roy." Ed said smile lightly. Roy yawned, "Goodnight, love."

Ed's eyes widened, "Love?" but Roy was already asleep.

Ed didn't sleep about an hour, until he woke with a start from a nightmare about Roy's mission. Ed didn't sleep the rest of the night.

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Roy awoke slowly around five thirty; Ed was lying next to him staring at the ceiling. "Why are you awake?" Roy asked startling Ed a little.

"I couldn't sleep." Ed admitted, "I was just about to wake you."

"You should have taken one of my pills." Roy said pulling the freezing blonde to him. "Your always cold aren't you?"

"That's why I wear long selves shirts. You need to shower and get ready. You can't be late," Ed, said pulling away.

"You're so damn persistent." Roy said climbing out of Bed leaving toward the shower.

"What kind of clothes you need?" Ed asked remembering Roy hadn't packed.

"Lay me out a uniform for today, then pack me one and civilian cloths Roy said for the bathroom. Ed did as he was told and sat on the bed fully dressed and hair brushed lying over his shoulders. Roy walked out of the bathroom towel hanging carelessly around his hips. His hair dripping, his bruise was gone and his toned chest and abs shown nicely. Pulled off his towel tossing it on the bed and put on his boxers, then dried his hair and shoulders. Ed sat on the bed watching Roy intently; loving the things he just saw happen hoping he would see it again soon. "What is today Roy?" Ed asked.

"Saturday, I'm scheduled to be home by 5 pm next Saturday. I should be on the door step by six." Roy said buttoning his pants and pulling on his shirt.

"Ok." Ed said quietly. Roy walked over and pulled Edward up off the bed. Roy pulled Ed into a tight embrace, "Edward, I'm going to call you once either on Wednesday or Thursday, I'm only allowed two calls and I'm going to have to use my other to call HQ." Roy explained.

"Alright, around what time?" Ed asked resting his head on Roy's chest taking in his scent.

"Probably seven to nine, if I don't call by nine I won't call, but I'll call one of the two days, I promise."

"Ok, be careful ok?" Ed asked biting his cheek.

"I will don't worry. You remember our numbers?" Roy asked.

"Yeah car 310, you're 103, Jean 099, Ross100, Alex 101, Falman 102." Ed recited.

"Good. Now come here." Roy said putting his finger under Ed's chin tipping it up and meeting Ed's lips, the soft lips he wouldn't feel in days. Roy made the kiss deep, with so much passion, burning the taste, the feel, everything into his mind. Finally breaking for air Roy brought his forehead to Ed's, "I have to go, I'll call," Roy said and kissed him again. Ed followed him to the door, receiving one last hug and kiss before he took off out the door. Ed watched him leave out the window and slide to the floor and stared at the wall for about fifteen minutes before, breaking down and crying.

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"You're all aware of the conditions and have no questions?" The Brigadier General Dean Davidson asked.

"Yes Sir," All fifteen men said in unison.

"Alright, Your dismissed to board the train, Good luck."

"Yes Sir, thank you Sir," They saluted and left.

Once they boarded the train Roy and Jean sat side by side and Vato to Jean's side. Armstrong and Ross across from them. Roy's heart felt strained, he had a sudden urge to cry but barely fought it off. Jean was looking at him, "You ok there boss?" Jean asked in a hushed tone.

"I'm fine." Roy said. 'Ed you better behave yourself. I promise to see you Sunday night.' Roy thought to him self.

Ed had picked himself up of the floor and was washing his face when a sudden feeling of relief washed over him. "Your better be home Sunday Roy." Ed said out loud, Ed could sense that even though Roy wasn't physically there beside him, he was always with him in his heart.

Damn that was difficult to write.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

REVIEWS!!! LOTS OF THEM!!! PLEASE AND THANKS!!!!!


	24. Conversations

Chapter 24

Ed sat on the couch in the living room eating his lunch and reading over the news paper. Seeing if there was anything in there that peaked his interest. Thankfully nothing did. It was Tuesday, Ed sighed at the realization that there was still five days left before Roy returned. It was driving him crazy, and on top of that this feeling, sure he expected to miss Roy, but this was different. It hurt and weighed him down in way he never felt before. It haunted him, 'so this is love?' Ed found himself wondering. He had thought it was love the day he came to realize he had feeling for Roy, 'It's foolish to think your in love with some when you just realized your gay.' Ed thought. Ed's eyes widened. "Gay?" he said out loud. 'Who ever said I was gay?' Ed thought. 'Oh well what's it matter, I'm with a man so I guess that can make a person gay.' Ed chuckled to himself. The phone rang Ed reached for it, "Hello?"

"Edward," Winry's voice rang on the other Ed.

"Winry, what ya calling for?" Ed asked.

"I got some free time," Winry said, "plus I wanted to ask you a few question, and get some honest answers."

"Um…well, I'll try."

"You'd tell me anything, right?"

"Um…sure Win, what are you getting at?" Ed asked shifting in his seat.

"Ed calm down, I just want to know how your doing, I've been worried." Winry said.

"I'm doing fine, Winry." Ed said leaning bad and squeezing the bridge of his nose.

"Roy told me about your problem, you know. You can talk to me." Winry said.

"There isn't much to talk about, Winry. I used to drink till I passed out, then I'd wake up and do it over again. I suppose word gets around, that and ex-state alchemist like my self, fell down a winding, hilly path that's hard as hell to get back up." Ed stated.

"Word gets around?" Winry asked.

"Yeah, I suppose Roy didn't tell you he use to drag my drunk ass home every day." Ed said, reaching out folding up the paper he had scattered across the coffee table.

"No, I don't believe so." she said sarcasm in her voice.

"Well, on the morning he found me in an old bar. It was still stocked with a lot of hard liquor, so I drank. A lot I can't remember how much but I had a lot. I can't remember much of what happened I just know that I was sitting in the car and Roy was standing by the hood while I puked my guts out." Ed explain quickly not really wanting to talk about this.

"Oh, and Roy brought you to live with him."

"Yeah, I guess I scared him as much as I scared myself that day. I never threw up that much before. I probably should have been in the hospital from that alone."

"Oh, well, it seems you have a really good friend with you." Winry said.

Ed could hear a smirk in her tone, "What are you getting at Winry?" Ed asked.

"Oh, come on Edward!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Ed said defensively.

"He really cares about you Ed you know that right?" Winry said softly.

"What makes you say that?" Ed asked resting his elbow on the arm of the couch.

"He is so protective over you, overly protective." Winry said.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." Ed said sounding as though he was telling the truth.

"Ed, why is he so protective over you?" Winry asked.

"I don't have the man's brain. I don't know his reasons for things. It's his personal choice I suppose." Ed snapped.

"Ed, have you ever had a girlfriend?" Winry asked.

"What? Where'd this come from?" Ed asked.

"It's just a question, calm down." Winry giggled.

"Yeah, Winry I've had several, and slept with more." Ed said his irritation raising.

"God, Edward, you didn't have to tell me that." Winry said, sounding slightly discussed.

"You don't have too ask me stupid questions." Ed barked out. "How about you? Certainly not to many sense there are only about four guys within your reach." Ed said rudely.

"That's rude, I'm content in my love life thank you." Winry snapped.

"See…" Ed said not really knowing what else to say.

"Ed, when are you going to visit Al?" Winry asked softly.

"…I don't know yet, I have to wait till… I just have to wait," Ed said, "Probably several weeks or so."

"Your going to stay with me and granny, right Ed?" Winry asked quietly.

"Win, what's wrong?" Ed asked lowering his tone.

"Why don't you ever visit or call? You've always been that way, and I can tell in voice your hiding something for me." Winry admitted.

"Winry there are some things I don't want everyone too know, don't take offense from it ok?" Ed explained kindly.

"Yeah, I guess I'll talk to you later ok? Will you call Ed?" Winry asked quickly.

"In a few days. Goodbye." Ed hung up. That had to be one of the strangest phone conversations he had had in a long time.

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Roy sighed and put his hand back up on the steering wheel. It was Wednesday, all they've done all week is drive all around the city and the outskirts of it.

"Damn, I'm so stiff. Where are we going boss?" Havoc asked from the back seat of the car. Havoc sat in the back with Ross to his right and Falman to his left, while Roy drove and Armstrong sat in the passenger seat.

"Havoc you know as well as anyone else in here we just follow the cars in front of us. If they stop we stop, they turn we turn, we're only here as protection, or backup however you wish to put it.

"Have we even found any leads?" Falman asked.

"Yeah, they said that they should be in a general area that were headed to they won't tell us much in fear of someone over hearing anything." Roy explained.

"How long have we been driving?"

"Hours, too many." Roy said looking out his window, "Have you guys noticed this black car behind us following us? The license plate is the same every time I look so I know it's not the same model car."

"I have," Armstrong admitted. Ross went to turn and look, "Don't, Ross sit still."

Roy picked up his radio, squeezing the button, "Sir I have some information, that may or may not be helpful." Roy said.

"What would that be Mustang?" The driver of the first car said.

"This car behind me has been following us since about 15 after we left the motel."

"Are you sure?"

"The license plate numbers are the same."

"Keep an eye on them have someone right the numbers down, we're going to stop to fill up and stretch at the next gas station."

"Sir" Roy said sitting down the radio and looking in the review mirror, "You better hope someone in this car has a pen and paper."

"I do Sir," Ross said pulling them from her jacket pocket.

"130-0991" Roy read off the numbers and she scribbled them down.

"Put the paper back in your pocket." Roy said looking ahead.

"You look nice, by the way." Falman said to Maria.

"Thanks you too." She said softly.

"Aw, come on, no one ever compliments me." Jean said sarcastically in the back.

Roy raised an eyebrow at him and looked back at Jean before turning back, "You look like Riza picked your cloths for you." There was absolutely nothing wrong with his clothing, black pants and brown long sleeved shirt. Roy's comment caused everyone one to look at Jeans clothing.

"Yeah, definitely." They all said. Even Armstrong joined in.

"What's wrong with my cloths?" Jean said searching himself over, causing everyone to laugh, "What's so damn funny?"

"Jean calm down you look fine," Roy said, everyone following in on complimenting him.

They drove on for another fifteen minutes before they finally turning into a little run down gas station. Everyone exited their car's and receiving orders, while other stretched and walked into the bathroom.

"Armstrong you mind filling the car up?" Roy asked

"No, Sir."

"Ross come with me."

Roy and Maria walked to the first car as, Armstrong filled up the car and jean nosily stretched. "It's getting dark," Roy heard Jean say before they got out of ear shot.

"Mustang."

"Sir, they didn't follow us in here. But this is the number" Roy said as Ross handed the man the paper.

"Ok if you see them again let us know." he said as he turned away.

As they all entered the car, Roy yawned. He hadn't slept well since he left, for two reasons, he left his medicine at home, in fear of going into a deep sleep and no one being able to wake him. And sleeping in the little, lonely motel beds, wasn't necessarily his cup of tea. Especially the lonely part, he didn't have those long golden locks of hair to play with before surrendering to sleep ever night. Roy hoped Ed was doing ok, he worried that temptation would take over Ed. He was tired of being away from home, he longed for Ed. Roy glanced up in the rear view mirror and cringed.

"I'm being followed again," He spoke in to the radio.

"Alright, this may be the problem instead of terrorists, thanks we're going to head in for the night, keep your eyes on him, I'll alert the other car. Also HQ just came on a few minutes ago, we'll be home by Friday no matter if we find them or not. Over half of the squad is due for something, I'm not completely sure it broke off our radio signal suck's ass here."

"Yes Sir."

They pulled into a motel, the car following did also. Roy and the men from the other cars talked over it some, deciding to have someone watch over the two men that ended up being in the car closely, and in the morning have someone check all the cars.

Jean and Roy shared a room. Jean walked in dropped his suitcase and flopped onto the nearest bed, "I take it that's yours then?" Roy asked walking over to his and sitting down.

"Yes, and that means, keep your shit off it." Jean said laughing, standing and grabbing his stuff, "I'm going to shower."

"Ok," Roy said, laying back and looking at the clock, '8:00' He sat up hearing jean turn the water on. He reached out and dialed the number to his house.

"Hello?"

"Edward" Roy said with a smile.

"Roy! Thank god I thought you were going to be Winry." Ed laughed.

"Nope, how you been?" Roy asked.

"I assume you mean this damn temptation bugging the hell out of me? I'm fine Roy, don't worry." Ed said reassuringly.

"Good, you haven't made a drink or cut?" Roy asked this time listening closer to the tone, Ed's voice always gave him away the second time.

"No and no. Don't worry about me so much. Oh how long do you have to talk?" Ed asked.

"Probably an eternity. I'm going to go when Jean gets out of the shower so he can call Riza." Roy explained.

"Fair enough, you figure out anything yet."

"Yeah," Roy brought his voice down causing Ed to strain in order to hear, "We think their in the motel."

"Oh really, be careful, please." Ed said.

"Just remember the conversation we had before I left." Roy said then yawned.

"Tired?"

"All we have been doing is driving everyday all day." Roy explained. "And I have to drive, I out rank everyone in my group."

"Oh," Ed said with a yawn.

"Have you been sleeping well?" Roy asked.

"No," Ed admitted.

"Why? Tell the truth," Roy said.

"I'm cold and I'm having these damned nightmares." Ed explained.

"Take one of my pills tonight."

"Why didn't you take them with you." Ed asked.

"You know how hard it is to wake me," Roy said.

"Oh, alright."

"What have you been doing?" Roy asked sitting back.

"Reading mostly, and talking to Winry today, unfortunately." Ed said.

"I'll see if Jean will ask Riza can find you something to do, if you like?" Roy offered.

"That sounds good." Ed said with a soft chuckled.

Roy just smiled, "I miss you, so much Ed."

Ed's face reddened and his heart warmed at the words and the tone the were said in, "I miss you too, Roy."

"Have you worn your hair down today?" Roy asked.

"About half the day." Ed laughed.

"I love your hair." Roy said tenderly.

"Thanks, Roy." Ed said with a smile.

Roy heard jean turn the shower off, "He's out early."

Ed heard the disappointment in Roy's voice, "Then I'll let you go?" Ed asked.

"Yeah, I guess," Roy wanted to say more, but was so scared to.

"Ok, I'll see you Sunday then?"

"Friday, at six."

"What? Friday that's great!!" Ed sounded so excited, Roy wished he could see Ed's eyes happy and excited, not pained and depressed.

"Yeah… I've got to go, bye…"

"Good night Roy." Ed said and they hung up.

Roy sat back and rubbed his face.

"Something wrong boss?" Jean asked.

"Not at all," Roy lied, "Hey when you call Riza see if there isn't something she can come up with for Ed to do tomorrow he is getting restless."

"Sure no problem," Jean said looking in Roy's eyes, "Roy what's wrong? You've looked so worried and stressed. I've seen you on missions worse than this, you haven't ever got this way."

"I don't know, Havoc, I'm going to take a shower." Roy said standing.

"Roy you can tell me, I swear I won't tell anyone, I know I haven't really proven I can do that but…" Jean said truthfully.

"You've held a lot of shit back, and I do trust that you can hold secrets, to a certain level. And there are some things that I don't want everyone to know, please don't take it as offense."

"Roy, please just tell me." Jean said again,

"I can't-"

"It's about Ed right?" Jean said hoping to confirm some suspicions," You called him while I was in the shower right?" Jean asked sitting on his bed.

"Yeah," Roy said still standing.

"You didn't talk to him long enough then you couldn't have gotten much out." Jean explained.

"I asked him how he was doing told him how I was, and told him I would be back Friday." Roy explained.

"Roy…come on what's wrong. If it has to do with Ed, is something else wrong with him?"

Roy sighed and sat on his own bed, "I can't tell you, because I don't have his permission. Hell, when I told you about his drinking problem I thought the man was going to kill me. He is really self conscience about some of his problems lately." Roy explained.

"Problems? As in more than one," Jean asked.

"Yeah he's worse than any of us thought." Roy said.

"How?" Jean pushed on.

"Jean, I can't tell you he'll get angry with me." Roy said.

"That never stopped you before," Jean said.

Roy inwardly cringed at his own mistake, "Well, you live with the hothead and tell me if you like having him the slightest bit aggravated."

"Roy, come on just admit it. I know already, and Riza thinks the same. I've seen the way you look at him, and the way he looks at you." Jean said, "Your both gay right?"

Roy's eyes widened before he could control himself. "I knew it. Why didn't you tell me you were gay sooner? And why'd you steal all my girlfriends?" Jean said jokingly.

"I'm not gay." Roy started.

"And yet your with a man." Jean said.

"I'm bisexual, there is a difference," Roy started again.

"So, Ed is bi too?" Jean asked.

"Honestly I'm not completely sure though I would think bi," Roy said.

"How long have you two been together?"

"Not long at all."

"What was his reaction when you made a move?"

"What's with the girly questions?" Roy asked.

"I'm sorry, you know how I get." Jean said quickly.

"I'm going to take a shower, call your wife." Roy said standing.

"Can I tell her? She and I both thought the same thing." Jean asked.

"Can she keep it secret?" Roy asked.

"Yes, someone could hold her own gun to her head and see wouldn't tell." Jean said.

"Then tell her, you do know I'm going to die when I tell him you two know. Hey, tell her NOT to tell Ed, she knows. I'll do that."

"Ok, no problem."

Roy walked into the bathroom, turned one the water and stripped down while it heated. He stepped in letting the hot water beat on his back and neck relieving some tension, he couldn't believe he let Havoc figure it out. "Ed's going to kill me." He said aloud to himself. Roy closed his eyes and lifted his face to the shower head, lifting a hand he ran it through his wet hair and down his neck. 'I really hope Ed won't be to mad at me.' Roy thought continuing with his shower. When he stepped out he heard Havoc talking on the phone, he couldn't make out what exactly he was saying, but it wasn't his business. Roy dried and dressed, when he walked to his bed Havoc looked up at him with a smile. Roy raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah thanks again, I love you, bye." Havoc hung up the phone.

"Riza is so happy for you two, she wanted me to tell you that and that she'll call Ed in a little bit." Jean said standing and stretching.

"Thanks again." Roy said climbing into his bed and plopping his head on the pillow.

"Night Roy," Jean said, "I'm going to go get something to eat."

"Don't get yourself in trouble, get it to go and come back. I don't want to listen to people bitch tomorrow." Roy said looking up at him.

"Yes sir." Havoc said sarcastically.

Roy plopped his head down again and fell into a light sleep.

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Ed had agreed to help Riza monitor the radios, she had never done it before and thought Ed could help.

It was confusing at first until bout ten other people piled in and ordered Riza and Ed to watch over two different waves. Ed's had been dead air most of the day, unlike Riza's it never shut up for hours. When it finally did Ed's started in it was static and voices broke through.

"Lead…two…bombs…cars…explosion…"

"Whoa wait, wait, wait." Ed said I've got something but it's all static I only got like five words." Ed said and Riza started messing around with the connections.

"I Repeat." The man said.

"That's good." Ed said, "That's good, it isn't getting better." Riza said.

"There has been two car explosions today." the man said.

"It's a military newscast. And it's fading in and out. " Ed said as Riza started to listen in.

"Two explosions, I repeat again, two. One a civilian car and the other our own military. Not sure if there we're survivors. The car number was 310, all five military officers where in it, 099," Riza gasped and slapped a hand over her mouth, "100, 101, 102, 103. The driver hit hardest of then all."

Ed bit the inside of his cheek. "We just got word there were……….." and the radio cut off to static. Ed looked over at Riza. "Come on let me take you home." He said pulling her up and walking her to her car.

"Give me your keys, I'll drive you."

"How are you going to get home?" Riza asked, her voice cracking.

"I'll call a cab, you going to be ok?" Ed said taking her keys. They both sat in the car.

"In time I suppose." Riza started sobbing. Ed reached out and rubbed her back as he started the car and drove off. Luckily he new where she lived.

After getting her in and making sure she was going to be ok by calling her sister, he didn't even know existed, she arrived shortly after he called. Ed stood out by the street, noting the chilly air he caught a cab.

Upon entering the lonely house Ed showered and changed. Taking one of Roy's pills he laid in bed, "His is still alive and well, he is." Ed said out loud to himself. "I know he is he has to be." And Ed drifted to sleep by force of the medicine he used.

Ed awoke to an empty and cold bed. Ed stood and went to the restroom. After he ate he changed and started doing little odds and ends around the house for the rest of the day. Ed looked up at the clock, '5:50 P.M.'

'He'll be home soon,' Ed thought, and continued cleaning up the kitchen. "I locked the door so he'll have to knock." Ed continued his work until he finished looking up at the clock, '6:20'

"He's just late. He's just late. He's just late," Ed said over and over to himself. He busied himself by starting a simple dinner, by the time he finished that it was nearing seven.

"Roy Mustang, you did not die, you did not die." Ed said backing up to a wall and sliding down it. As tears left his eyes Ed ran his automail finger over the deepest scar on his wrist. "This can't be happening I've lost everyone I've ever cared for deeply has died, why does everyone have to die. Why can't I just die?" Ed asked himself, he was rocking to and fro hugging his knees and crying. Looking up at the clock seeing it was seven thirty, Ed stood and stared at it until it changed to '7:31' then with his flesh hand he punched it breaking it into pieces. "DAMNIT ROY, I TOLD YOU NOT TO MAKE PROMISES YOU CAN"T KEEP!!!" Ed Yelled out, "What kind of man makes a promise he can't keep?" Ed quoted Roy before falling to his knees. "Damn you, Roy." Ed said lifting his now bloody hand. "Roy Mustang," Ed said staring at the broken clock. Ed lower his hand to the floor. The hard wood floor was cold under his hand, it made him cringe, he balled his hand into a fisted and punched the floor, breaking the wound wider. He punched the floor again, this time not lifting it back up. He felt the blood leaving his hand and spreading across the floor, a tear left his eye falling and hitting the floor next to his hand. Ed took a deep breath and looked up into the kitchen, the silver of a knifes blade was shining brightly on the counter. Ed stood, fist tight, and walked into the kitchen. He stood there, just looking at the long knife. The blade wide and long. Ed picked it up with his automail and turned it watching the light catch on the blade and flash in his eyes.

'You're a strong man Edward, you really are if you want to be. Nothing is going to happen to me this time. But if and when it does, I want to be strong, don't do anything crazy Ed. I couldn't rest peacefully.' Roy's words violently hit Ed causing him to drop the knife. Ed leaned forward bracing himself on the counter, "this can't be happening," Ed said as a sob escaped his lips.


	25. Words

Chapter 25

Ed stood at the kitchen sink tears rolling silently down his face, standing still you could hardly see him breathing. His mind was blank, absolutely nothing on his mind. Ed sighed trying to bring his mind back to earth, looking down at his hand it was still bleeding a little. He walked into the bedroom and looked at the time, eight o'clock. "He's not coming back is he?" Ed asked himself. Bringing his bloodied hand to his forehead, he was burning hot; Ed went out on the front porch sitting on the stares. The chilly air hitting his tendered eyes making them water. He sat there watching cars drive by in the night, hearing laughter from across the street causing him to look up to see a teenage couple getting home from a date, cringing Ed brought his knees up hugging them and burying his face in his arms after wiping his hand on his pant's leg. Ed supposed heard at lest four more cars go by and, the teenager get in his car and leave but wasn't sure he couldn't keep his attention straight.

"Hey, what are you doing out here?" Ed heard that deep, loving voice ask. 'I'm hearing things' He thought.

"Edward?" It said again. Looking up into deep onyx eyes full of concerned worry. 'I'm seeing things, like I did with Alphonse,' Ed thought. Roy bent down in front of Edward and looked at his eyes. Ed closed his eyes tightly then opened them to see Roy with confusion written over his features. Ed reached out with his flesh hand and touched Roy's cool cheek. Roy smiled and leaned towards Ed's palm.

"Roy?" Ed asked sadly tears filling his eyes.

"Yeah? Come on it's getting pretty cool out, lets go -" Roy was interrupted when Ed's arms flew around his neck. "Roy!" Ed cried out, tears falling down his face. "Ed what's wrong?" Roy asked putting an arm under Ed's rear and lifting him up. Somehow Roy managed to open the front door and then kicked it shut. "Edward, what's wrong?" Roy asked dropping his suitcase and repositioned Ed. "Roy…" Ed started.

Roy went to lower Ed to his feet. Ed felt himself being lowered and slipped off of Roy.

Ed was standing in front of Roy looking at him; Ed wiped his eyes and smiled. Roy reached out and grabbed Ed's face, "What's wrong Edward?" Roy asked.

"Nothing now, I'm just happy your ok." Ed said closing his eyes and leaning to Roy's touch.

"Of course I'm ok, Ed."

"You're so late, it's almost eight thirty," Ed said.

"The train station was under going a search of every passenger, because of what happened in Burmson." Roy said pushing Ed's bangs out of his face, the smooth blonde locks he loved, but his hand ran over something rough in Ed's hair.

"Oh, what happened?" Ed asked. Roy lifted Ed's hair with his finger seeing what the feeling was.

"Ed, why is there blood in your hair?" Roy asked looking him in the eye. Ed remained silent and lifted his hand, the bleeding had stopped, and there wasn't hardly a trace that it had bled as much as it did.

"Ed what'd you do?" Roy asked taking Ed's hand in his own, examining it.

"I punched something." Ed admitted.

"What? Why'd you do that?" Roy asked.

"I didn't think you were coming back." Ed said lowering his head.

"I know I was late and I tried to call but they had all the phones locked, I'm sorry I worried you lets go in the kitchen and clean you up." Roy said leading Edward in to the kitchen.

"Smells good in here," Roy said as the aroma of Raman floated into his nostrils.

"It's probably not anywhere near edible now it sat too long." Ed stated, "It was instant anyway."

"Oh well, I ate at the train station." Roy said walking toward the sink but stopped when his boot hit something. Looking down Roy's eye's widened, he turned and grabbed Ed's wrist and turned it over seeing nothing he pulled Ed's sleeve, seeing nothing, "Roy I didn't cut I swear." Ed reassured Ed.

"Why is it out?" Roy asked looking at the floor and over to where the clock use to be, now, instead was a pile of clock parts and a small puddle of blood next to it. "Ed what happened in here?"

"Can we talk later?" Ed asked quietly.

Roy looked at Ed for a moment, "I suppose, what do you want to do after we get your hand cleaned?"

"I don't care…just don't leave me," Ed said looking up pleading in his eyes.

"I'm not leaving until I go for work Monday." Roy said a smile on his face, but worry remained in his onyx eyes.

Roy picked up the knife and sat it in the sink noticing a small amount of blood on the counter, but Roy said nothing not yet anyway. Roy carefully cleaned out Ed's wound and lightly wrapped it seeing as how it wasn't as bad as it looked or let on, and the strip of hair that was bloodied.

After Ed cleaned up his messes, Roy lead Edward into the living room, he plopped down onto the couch and undone a few buttons on his civilian shirt, then slipped off his shoes and swung a leg up on the couch leaning back on the arm of the couch and pulled Ed down to sit with him. They sat Ed's back on Roy's chest and resting his head on Roy's shoulder, cheek to cheek, Roy's arms wrapped lovingly around the younger.

"I missed you," Roy said lifting his head back to look at Ed.

"I missed you too, so much." Ed said turning and looking at Roy. A smile finding it's way across both their faces before Roy captured Ed's lips and a soft lingering kiss. Roy pulled back and lightly squeezed Ed. Ed moved into his pervious position, and brought his arms up and grasped Roy's arms lightly.

They sat like that for a while, Roy had been fumbling with the hem of Ed's shirt until he spoke, "So, Ed, what happened here?" he asked leaning his head closer to Ed's if possible.

Ed sighed, "It's a long story, kinda." Ed said, "But if you must know,"

Roy nuzzled Ed's neck, "I must," he said after placing one innocent peck on Ed's neck.

"Well, Riza and I were monitoring the military radio airwaves. Riza's had kept her busy, when it finally died out mine started up, static at first, then it cleared but it was a weak signal. It was a military newscast, it said there were two explosions a civilian car and yours, it said the driver was hit hardest. They didn't know if there were survivors, they were about to announce it but we lost all signal." Ed explained then looked up at Roy, "I didn't believe it, I couldn't, all that went through my head was, 'he promised' it was childish but that's all I could think! I took one of your pills like you told me too, I went to sleep. When I woke I kept my mind busy by doing little things around the house and by fixing that dinner, by the time I finished with that it was seven thirty, I had been telling myself, 'he's just late,' I just stared at the clock until it changed I punched it and then I punched the floor. I tried to cool myself off a little, but the knife caught my eye, but I couldn't your words hit me and I dropped it. I went to the bedroom and it was eight, I couldn't believe it I was hot so I went out side. Then you showed up I thought I was hearing and seeing things, thankfully I wasn't." Ed said sitting up and rubbing his face, "What really happened Roy?"

Roy sat up and wrapped his arms around Ed, "Ed…" Ed melted into Roy's touch, "Yeah?"

"We found a bomb under our car, we couldn't figure it out so, we pushed it out into a empty, wide street, and made sure it wouldn't harm anyone, I set it off early. No one was hurt. You're ok now? You didn't hurt your self other than your hand?" Roy asked leaning back pulling Ed with him.

"Yeah, I'm fine, now." Ed said moving with Roy.

"Ed, you scared me. When I saw you out side I didn't think much of it, but when you acted like you did it worried me. Then I saw your hand, and the knife, let alone the blood. It scared the shit out of me." Roy said tightening his embrace around Ed, "I'm so happy your ok."

"I was so happy when I realized you were really there." Ed said leaning back onto Roy.

Roy smiled lightly, "Hey," Roy said gaining Ed's attention. Ed looked up and Roy captured Ed's lips, thrusting his tongue into Ed's mouth, their tongues when into a battle for dominance Ed losing. Roy explored the moist cavern, seeming too soon Roy's lungs started to burn from the lack of air. Breaking away Roy looked at Ed and watched him turn and reposition himself so he was straddling Roy's hips. Roy sat up and captured Ed's mouth again. Ed was hovering somewhat over Roy's hips, Roy left Ed's mouth and trailed kisses to Ed's neck kissing sucking and nipping. The pressure in Roy's groin was becoming painful as Roy continued his actions, Ed's breathing was starting to quicken when Roy decided the bedroom was a more proper place. Roy coaxed Ed off the couch. After they were both standing Ed moved forward pressing his body to Roy's and kissing Roy fiercely. Roy pushed on the aroused man in front of him urging him toward the bedroom. Ed's jacket fell off in the hallway. Ed was unbuttoning Roy's shirt and slipped it off his shoulders as the back of his legs hit the bed. Roy had a firm grip on Ed's left arm so he wouldn't fall onto the bed yet. Roy broke away and pulled off Ed's shirt and tossing it into the darkness of the room. Roy reached up and down, as Ed reached down. Roy put two finger between the belt and Ed's pants with one hand and pulled out Ed's braid with the other, then reaching down and undoing and pulling Ed's belt off. Ed, impatient as he was worked with the belt Roy was wearing, pulling it off, before being pushed down on the bed. Roy moved swiftly toward Ed's neck, kissing and nipped, being driven by the wonderful moans that escaped Ed's mouth. Roy traced a hand down Ed's body, lightly running his fingers up and down Ed's zipper. Ed thrust his hips up to gain some much needed friction, but Roy moved his hand away. Ed moaned, "Come on," Roy nipped roughly at Ed's collar before replying, "Impatient?" and kissed down Ed's hest kissing and sucking his nipples. Roy kissed down Ed's stomach and slowly unbuttoning Ed's pants, and slowly unzipping them. Roy pulled off Ed's pants and boxers, then his own. Returning to Ed's mouth and pressing his body against the one below him. Ed moaning into Roy's mouth. Roy drank in Ed's moan caressing and taunting Ed's body. Roy lifted himself up, "Hands and knees, Edward." Roy whispered huskily in to Ed's ear and licking it before allowing him to turn as he reached into the bedside table. "You done this with another man before?" Roy asked breathing hard.

"No…"

"It'll hurt but trust me," Roy bent over Ed's back, "It's worth it." Roy nibbled on Ed's ear lobe as he slicked his fingers with the lotion. Roy teased Ed's entrance. Ed tensed as Roy pushed one finger into Ed. "relax, Ed." Ed took a breath and slowly became used to the feel of Roy's finger. Roy added another, then another, finally when Ed got use to the feel Roy pulled his fingers out. "Relax, this is going to be worse," Roy placed his hands on either side of Ed's hips. Slowly he entered Ed. Ed tensed around him. Roy gritted his teeth, "Relax," Roy said know fully in Ed. Roy stayed still allowing Ed to get used to the feel. Ed took a quick breath and pushed back on Roy. Roy began rocking his hips slowly at first; he felt Ed's body tense as he moaned loudly, "Do that again!" Roy hit Ed's sweet spot again; "Faster" Roy obeyed his command and sped up. Ed rocking with him. Roy reached around grasping Ed's erection stroking it in time with his and Ed's motions. Ed moaned, "Roy…I'm…" Roy quickened his movements feeling his own climax. Ed saddened yelled Roy's name spilling his seed over Roy's hand. Hearing his name being yelled from those wonderfully soft lips, and the feel of the seed that spilt over his hand pushed him over the edge as bit down on Ed's shoulder. Ed winced as Roy spilt into him and his teeth broke his skin and yet found it comforting, Roy pulled out and fell onto to the bed pulling Ed down next to him.

"God," Ed said. Roy looked over at his lover, "I never imaged a feeling that great."

"You're not trying to imply you were a virgin? I know better." Roy said sarcastically with a chuckle.

"No, God no." Ed melted into Roy's side.

Roy basked in the moment then took a deep breath and looked at Ed, "Ed," his voice serious and nervous, "Ed, I love you." Roy cringed, if Ed didn't return his feelings he wasn't going too able to hold him self-together anymore, not again. Roy closed his eyes preventing tears, then he felt Ed move, 'Is he leaving me?' Roy thought. Roy's eye flew open when Ed's lips softly flew over his own, Ed's hair fell around their faces, breaking away slowly and resting his forehead on Roy's, "I love you too."

Roy heart warmed and he drew Ed closer.

"Good. Lets go to sleep love." Roy said embracing Ed tightly. Ed melted into Roy's arms and listened to Roy's heartbeat as it lulled him to sleep.


	26. In Bed

Chapter 26

Lying in bed listening to the steady breathing of his new lover, Roy's mind running at full speed. 'Did he really mean it? We haven't been together very long what is it? Close to two weeks? Hell, I couldn't keep track with anyone.' Roy thought, that's all that he could think about. For hours he had been lying there staring at the ceiling. He started off staring at the sleeping blonde that know has his back to Roy, but Roy was too tempted to wake him up. He kept telling himself, 'He is still sick, let him sleep.' Roy sighed and looked over at Ed, the urge to yawn hit him. Rolling onto his side he studied Ed. Ed was curled into a ball hugging the covers close to his body.

"You cold?" Roy asked out loud.

"Roy? Your awake?" Ed asked.

Ed's voice started Roy he was expecting a mumble or some incoherent words but not a clear as day question, "Yeah, have been. Is something bothering you Ed?" Roy asked seeing a small shaking movement from Ed he couldn't tell if it was a shiver or a stifled cry.

"No…just…cold." Ed said slowly.

"Edward," Roy said reaching out and touching his shoulder pulling him closer. Ed rolled and buried his face in Roy's chest. "What's wrong?"

"Just cold, cold." Ed muttered.

"I don't think that's it." Roy urged rubbing Ed's back.

"Did you mean it?" Ed asked barely above a whisper.

"What?" Roy's brow furrowed.

"Forget it…It's not important."

"It must be it has you worked up," Roy said softly wrapping his arms around Ed's body.

"It's stupid, I just don't think it's worth asking." Ed said slowly.

"Ask anyway." Ed lay there in silence for a few minutes. A single tear exited Ed's eye, Ed wiped it away before it could fall. "Edward? You ok? What's bothering you?" Roy asked.

"Nothing, I'm fine."

"Ed, stop lying to me I hate it when you do." Roy said sadly, "What could be so bad you can't tell me?"

"It'll hurt you," Ed whispered.

Roy heart froze, "What's on your mind?" Roy said calmly.

"Did…did you mean it?" Ed asked his voice cracking.

"Mean what?" 'Surely he wasn't thinking the same as I had been.' Roy thought to himself.

"Shit, just forget I said anything." Ed said as he rolled onto his over side facing away from Roy.

"Edward? Are…are you talking about what I said earlier?" Roy asked carefully while leaning over Ed brushing the hair out of his face. Ed recoiled from Roy's touch with a whimper.

"I can't believe I can't just believe it." Ed paused, "But I don't know; I love you; I know that's true. You're probably-" before Ed could finish his sentence Roy's lips cut him off. Roy pulled away slow and looked at Ed, "-pissed." Ed finished.

"Don't feel bad, I was worried about the same thing." Roy admitted and turned Ed around to face him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, Roy" Ed said snuggling to Roy's side. Roy had no response; instead he just embraced the blonde next to him. Ed looked up at Roy's onyx eyes as Roy looked down at him. Onyx clashed with bullion. A smile broke across Roy's face and he nuzzled Ed cheek, "You should go to sleep."

"Heh, you should to." Ed said leaning onto Roy.

"And I will." Roy kissed Ed's forehead. "And I love you."

Ed's heart froze as he smiled, "I love you too," Ed said then kissed Roy's bare chest. Roy wrapped his arms around the thin form in front of him, and playfully intertwined their legs. Ed sighed in content and lay there enjoying the moment; he didn't want to sleep. He could tell Roy was still awake after about twenty minutes. Ed sighed and closed his eyes, then Roy's hand that had been rest on Ed's back began to trace over the scars on his back, "Sleep Edward, your still sick from the DT."

"How do you know if I'm still sick? You don't feel what I do." Ed said in annoyance and curiosity.

"Body language. Your eyes are still clouded with sick." Roy explained, hoping he didn't just give away how he could read Edward.

"Clouded with sick? Damn my eyes, Al was always able to read me like a damned book, mom too." Ed said.

"Really?" Roy said unsure if it was the proper thing to say.

"Yeah, Heh, it always pissed me off." Ed sighed again. "That's how you can tell what's wrong with me. I can't stop my self either. I tried Al…Alphonse laughed in my face. I remember it like it was yesterday." Ed said with a smile. Roy stopped his movements and shifted his position as did Ed. "He had told me my eyes where like a book once the next day, something happened…" Ed paused, "I think he picked up another damned cat, yeah that's it. He begged to keep it; I acted like I was pissed so he would put it back. Then he started laughing, 'Brother you want to keep it, and I see it in your eyes!' He caught me so off guard…he was still in the armor." Ed fell silent. Roy rubbed his back again. "I miss him. I just want to see his smiling face again!" Ed buried his face in Roy's chest.

"I know, I know." Roy said, putting his cheek on the side of Ed's head.

"I just want-" Ed paused. The three words and pause made Roy cringe. He didn't want to hear the rest, but he needed to make Ed say it.

"Ed?"

A whimper escaped his lips, "Why won't you let me end everything?" Ed asked.

"Because that's not the answer. Edward, where do you think your brother is?" Roy asked.

"Never really gave it much thought. I'm an atheist." Ed said.

"As am I." Roy put both his hands on Ed's chest. "He is here Edward. In you. You're living the rest of his life for him!"

Ed jaw was trembling, "I – I really am?"

"Yes." Roy said looking into the golden eyes he loved. Those eyes suddenly became pained and distant. Then they closed and a loud sob left Ed's lips. Roy pulled Ed close rubbing his back and whispering comfort word in his ear. Though it was hopeless and he knew it would be. Roy felt tears of his own. 'I left him alone for a fucking week and he is having these feelings still. He could be dead. Fuck Mustang! What were you thinking!?' Roy's tears fell and he squeezed Ed tight. "Edward if I ever lose you…" Roy's voice left him as he began to cry with Edward.

They were like that for a long while. Roy calmed and after a while looked at Ed. Ed was sleeping lightly tears still rolling and a death grip on Roy, scratching his bare back.

"I love you Ed, just stay with me!" Roy said putting his forehead on Edward's, "Don't you leave me!"

"Roy, love you," Ed mumbled through sobs and sleep. It was strange and new for Roy. Talking, crying and sleeping at the same time. He'd never seen it before.

Roy managed to sleep a little himself. Finally giving up at six AM. Yawning he let go of Ed and stretched, then quickly scoped Ed up in his arms, "I love you." Roy whispered in Ed's ear after taking note he was sleeping with a look of content.

"Lo you" Ed mumbled nuzzling Roy's shoulder. Fifteen minutes or so Roy nearly flew through the roof when Ed's cold automail touched his bare hip. A hiss escaped his lips and he looked down at Ed whom was awake and looking up at Roy with confusion. Confused golden irises turning guilty and ashamed as Ed brought his cold automail to his own chest holding it with his flesh hand, "I'm sorry."

"None of that." Roy said taking Ed's automail hand and replacing it on his hip. "See, it's fine. I wasn't expecting it." Roy said hoping to reassure Ed.

"I suppose." Ed replied removing his hand from Roy's hip and pulling the blanket over his shoulder with a yawn. Roy chuckled, "Still sleepy love?"

"Yes, very." Ed said turning away from Roy with the blanket hugging him.

"Well, if you're going to sleep…" Roy said moving closer toward Ed affectively spooning him and embracing the thin man tightly, "I should too."

"Mmmm…" Ed hummed and scooted back on Roy the best he could and shivered.

After a few minutes Ed's eyes flew open and he tensed at the feel of Roy's member on his behind. Roy Smiled when he felt Ed tense and then pressed his lips to the back of Ed's neck, "Sorry can't help it." Roy said huskily grazing his teeth over the side of Ed's neck and lightly biting his nape, earning a gasp from Ed. Roy nibbled at Ed's ear whispering seductive words. Roy's hand found it's way under the covers and played with Ed's nipples. Ed moaned as Roy kissed and nipped his way down Ed's exposed back once reaching his lower back and under the cover he pushed Ed on his back, licking and nipping where port of Ed's automail leg and flesh met. Ed was amazed to say the lest, the feeling of Roy's mouth on his leg was unbelievable. Never in his wildest dreams had imagined the simple kisses could make him so hot. Much to Ed's delight Roy moved upward slowly but moved right around Ed's own hardened member. Roy's mouth fell onto Ed's thrusting his tongue into Ed's mouth tasting pure Ed, no taste of food, drinks, or toothpaste blocking it. The taste he loved so much. Ed thrust his hips to gain friction from Roy, but Roy moved up away.

Ed growled low at Roy, "Come on, Roy."

Roy captured his lips again, "You're an impatient person, love."

"Nnnuhh, I don't care." Ed moan throwing his head back into the pillow as Roy bit down on Ed's neck breaking the skin the licking the small amount of blood.

"Roy.." Ed moaned. Roy licked down Ed's neck and sucked at his nape until a love mark was showing its colors. Smirking against Ed's skin at it Roy heard Ed moan, "Roy, please."

"Please what?" Roy said into Ed's ear, his lips brushing over the lobe.

"Don't make me beg, Roy" Ed said exposing his neck more to Roy, whom bite down on it roughly, lapping up and blood that threatened to fall.

"I want to hear you say it." Roy said running his hand down Ed's chest.

"Hhaa…Roy, please, just….nnuh.." Ed said as Roy made his fingers dance over Ed's abs.

"Please what?" Roy said.

"Enter me." Ed said a blush forming over his cheeks.

"Gladly, love" Roy said kissing him again and reaching out for the lotion. Slicking his member then stroking Ed a few times earning a moan, then a whimper of protest as his hand left Edward.

Roy teased Ed's entrance with his fingers before suddenly sliding his member in receiving a loud moan from Ed in the process. Roy remained still to allow Ed to get used to the feeling, but when Ed rocked back that was all it took, Roy rocked in time with Ed. Slowly at first then a little faster once he hit Ed's sweet spot. Ed reached for his own member only to have Roy push his hand away; Roy took Ed into his hand stroking him in time with his movements. A tingling sensation soon built up in side both of the men.

"Roy. Roy…I'm…nnngghhh…" Ed said then yelled out Roy's name as he spelt his seed between them. Roy soon followed, spilling into Ed then falling on his side.

Ed looked around the door in attempt to regain his composer, his gaze falling upon the clock. "Early riser." Ed laughed as he rolled over onto Roy.

"Forgot my medicine. Though I could blame you for that." Roy smirk wrapping his arms around Edward.

"Ah well it seems to be worth it." Ed smiled.

"Most defiantly." Roy traced a finger over one of the three bite marks.

"Yeah what are you a vampire?" Ed joked.

"Only with you, sorry I do tend to bite a lot." Roy said running a hand through Ed's long locks.

"No, no, it perfectly fine." Ed blushed. Roy chuckled and lightly bite Ed's neck.

"Not again, I don't know if I could walk after a third time." Ed laughed.

Roy joined in, then Ed's stomach growled loudly. "Hungary Ed?"

"Yeah." Ed said.

"Let get something to eat then." Roy said standing. Ed followed pain surging up his spine as they both slipped their boxers back on.

"Yeah, ow." Ed laughed.

"Sorry," Roy chuckled.

They began to walk down the hall when Ed noticed a different pain coming from his automail port, 'Must be a cramp or something.' Ed thought then pushed it in the back of his mind.

After eating Roy's cooking Ed decided to do the dish and re-doctor his hand. While heading to the living room the pain made itself known until it was unbearable.

Once he hit the tile floor of the living room, Ed collapsed onto the floor with a yell. Roy quickly by his side.

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	27. A Calm Day

Chapter 27

Walking out of the kitchen Roy looked at Ed whom was now lying on the couch, sleeping lightly. Ed's automail leg was on the floor where they left it after he fell. Sitting down the glass of water Ed requested Roy lightly covered Ed's body that was still clad in boxers. Looking over at the automail Roy sighed, 'some welcome Home party. Sex, tears, sex, hurt lover' Roy looked back at Ed whom was looking back at him. "I'm sorry, some welcome home party huh?" Ed asked. Roy's eyes widened, 'It's like he reads my mind.' Roy thought. Ed sat up and looked at Roy with apologetic eyes. "Hey, its fine." Roy said then kissed Ed's forehead and sat with him on the couch. "I still get to see you, stay in a decent mood and I'll be happy as ever." Roy said putting an arm around Edward. Ed leaned on Roy with a smile and pulled the blanket over both of them. "Is it just me or is it cold?" Ed asked.

"Yeah I think it is too. It November it's going to get cold." Roy said and thought out loud.

Ed groaned.

"What?" Roy asked.

"I'm always so cold." Ed replied.

"Sorry."

"It's not like it's your fault." Ed said, "It's my own - "

"Hey no reminiscing in bad memories now." Roy said turning his face into Ed's golden hair. "I'll be back." Roy said, getting up.

Roy left the room; Ed could hear him moving stuff around in the spare room. Roy came back with a box and kicked at Ed's automail to get it out of the middle of the floor.

"Here." Roy said sitting down and placing the box between himself and Ed.

"What's this?" Ed asked opening the box.

"Junk, make your self a crutch. I know you'll try hopping around, I couldn't watch that." Roy said softly.

"That was thoughtful," Ed stated, "Thanks, it means a lot to me." Ed clapped his hands and made a crutch then used it and stood. "Ha!"

Roy chuckled then picked up the box and stood. "Hey wait just a minute." Ed said looking over his shoulder at Roy.

"What?" Roy asked.

"I want that." Ed said nodding his head at the box.

"The box?" Roy asked arching an eyebrow.

"No, the book, unless it has writing in it." Roy picked it out of the box.

"I Think it's clean," he sat down the box and leafed though the book. "It's blank." Roy said sitting it on top of the blanket.

"Kay, thanks." Ed said then turned away and left to the bedroom. Roy took the box back to the spare room. Roy walked into the bedroom, leaning against the doorframe and looked at Ed who was sitting on the bed with a pile of clean clothes to his side. He looked up at Roy and smiled. "Hello."

"Hi," Roy chuckled.

Ed picked up his shirt and slipped it over his head. "What are you staring at?" Ed asked as he took off his boxers and tossed them across the room to the pile off cloths he made while coming in.

"You," Roy said as his gaze lowered.

Ed blushed and put his boxers on nearly falling in the process. "Damn-it"

As Roy watched that display it tore him up inside, he wanted to ask Ed if he wanted help, he already knew the reaction, and he didn't want to anger Ed. Edward picked up his pants and unfolded them with a sigh. Suddenly dropping he gaze away from Ed so he didn't have watch Edward stumble and struggle. But his head snapped up.

"Roy?" Ed asked, "I…um…need help." Ed asked there was a hint of embarrassment in his voice.

"Gladly," Roy said and hurried over to Ed. "Here," Roy said grabbing Ed's pants then Ed's hands. "Hold on tight" Roy said putting Ed's arms over his own shoulder's, now pull yourself up"

Ed obliged and lifted himself up on Roy so Roy could slip the pant leg over his leg. Then dropped himself when he was told. Roy buttoned and zipped his pants then wrapped his arms around Ed's waist, "I love you" Roy said.

Ed's heart fluttered, "I love you too, Roy" A smile broke across both their faces then Roy pecked Ed on the lips.

Ed smiled and loosened his grip on Roy and slide down onto the bed. Roy smiled and reached out ran his hand over the top of Ed's hair to his chin and lifted his chin up placing a soft kiss upon his lips. Slowly pulling away Roy smiled, "I think I'll dress too."

"Damn…" Ed chuckled.

"Hey you got dressed!" Roy laughed.

"I was cold!"

"I know, don't get mad." Roy said unsure of Ed's tone.

"I'm not mad." Edward replied.

Roy got some cloths out of the dresser and sat on the bed. Slipping off his boxers first then tossing them across the room to the pile of cloths, Roy glanced at Ed whom was apparently enjoying his view. Smiling Roy dressed him self rather slowly.

After carrying and aggravated blonde to the living room, bringing Ed's crutch: they sat on the couch wrapped in a blanket. Ed sitting between Roy's leg, his back against Roy's chest.

"I could have gotten here myself." Ed stated.

"I would've carried you if you had your leg." Roy said softly. Ed only sighed in response and nuzzled Roy's neck. Roy turned his face toward Edward and sighed in content, taking in the unique scent of oil and vanilla once again. They sat still like that for a while with their eyes closed. Ed drifted into a very light sleep and Roy was beginning to doze when there was a knock of the door.

"Damn it all." Edward mumbled as he and Roy moved. Roy stood and left to answer the door. There was another louder knock. "I'm coming." Roy yelled, "shit." He muttered under his breath. Roy opened the door with a small yawn.

"Hiya Roy!" Jean chirped.

"Hello Roy." Riza said.

"Hi guys, what brings you here?" Roy asked polity, motioning for them to come in.

"We just wanted to drop by." Riza said.

"Where's the chief?" Jean asked with a smirk.

"Um he's in the living room." Roy said then looked around the corner. "Don't mention his leg." Roy said quietly.

"What happened?" Jean whispered.

"We don't know." Roy said. "Come lets sit, Ed still doesn't know you two know about us." Roy said with a smirk.

They smiled then walked into the living room. Ed was sitting at the end of the couch with the blanket around him. Jean sat in the soft recliner and Riza sat on his lap leaning back with a smile.

Roy went over and stood in front of Edward looking down at him with a soft smile. Ed looked up with confusion, "What do-" Ed was cut off when Roy picked him up and sat them down in there pervious position. Ed sat wide-eyed looking back and forth between the other three in the room.

"It's ok Ed they know." Roy said softly.

"Why?" Ed growled now a little angry with Roy for not telling him sooner.

"Hey talk to Jean, it's all his fault!" Roy said quickly.

"Sorry chief." Jean said.

"But Edward, we're both proud for you two." Riza said.

"Whatever, I don't care anymore. As long as he doesn't lose his job." Ed said leaning back on Roy with a yawn.

"So how long are you two staying?" Roy asked.

"I don't know, a little bit not to long." Jean replied.

"I see." Roy said.

"Well Roy how was things when you got home?" Jean asked.

"Tense, I was believed to be dead." Roy said pulling the blanket over Ed better and rubbing his arm before intertwining their fingers.

"I was plowed when I opened the door." Jean said hugging Riza.

Roy chuckled. Ed yawned and leaned his head back on Roy's shoulder.

"Tired are we?" Riza asked.

"Yeah, a little" Ed replied before his stomach growled loudly and he placed his hand over his stomach.

"I'm hungry too," Jean stated. "I know, Riza and I will go and buy lunch and bring it back."

"Money is on the-"Roy started but was interrupted.

"He said we'd buy." Riza said standing. "Edward what would you like?"

"Anything that doesn't have to do with milk." Ed mumbled into Roy's neck.

"Show yourselves back in you don't have to knock." Roy said.

They all chuckled, and Jean and Riza showed themselves out.

Ed yawned and nuzzled Roy's neck. Roy turned his face into Ed's head taking in his scent again then kissing his golden locks.

Ed smiled and let himself fall asleep, as did Roy.

Jean peaked in the window, "We should give them time." He said turning back to the car.

"Oh?" Riza asked getting in the car.

"They're already asleep." Jean laughed.

"Long night. I suppose." Riza smirked.

"If it was anything like ours," Jean said pecking her on the lips.

---------------------------------------

Jean and Riza quietly walked in and set the bags of food on the kitchen table then walked into the living room. Roy and Ed had repositioned themselves Roy was laying with his back against the couch and hugging Ed close to his body. Ed had his face hidden in Roy's chest, back to the world; both snuggled under the blanket tightly. Riza was standing in the doorway taking in the sight.

One of Roy's onyx eyes cracked open and then the other looking down at Ed and smiling, then kissing his forehead. Suddenly feeling eyes on him Roy looked up and saw Riza looking at him. Sighing Roy looked back at Ed's peacefully face.

"Ed. they're back wake up." Roy said softly.

"Why?" Ed mumbled in his sleep.

"Riza and Jean are here wake up." Roy said rubbing Ed's shoulder.

Ed opened his eyes and looked at Roy. "What?"

"They're back."

"Oh." Ed sat up and let Roy off the couch. Getting up and stretching Roy looked down at Ed who was rubbing his eyes, "I'll bring you your food."

"Thanks." Ed repositioned himself on the couch while the other got their food.

All sitting peacefully in the living room eat their sandwiches and fries Riza looked up at Ed whom was glaring intently at the automail that still lay on the floor. Riza looked up at Roy.

Feeling eyes on him Roy looked up at Riza, she nodded at Edward. Roy looked at Ed through the corner of his eye then gave Riza a look signaling to no longer pay attention. She and Jean who had seen the whole time acted as if they weren't paying attention. Roy reached out and touched Ed's left thigh.

Ed looked up at Roy then down to Roy's hand. Roy rubbed his thumb back and forth a few times then smiled and removed his hand to continue eating.

Ed lowered his head a little and quickly finished his food and sat back.

Everyone else soon followed.

"Thanks for the food." Ed mumbled.

Roy smiled and nodded in agreement. "It was no problem." Riza said.

Ed lifted his flesh head and swiped at an annoying strand of hair. "What happened to your hand, Ed?" Jean asked carefully and receiving a glare from Roy.

"I punched a clock." Ed stated looking at his hand then to Jean.

"Riza threw a vase," Jean said pulling Riza onto his lap and stroking her hair, which was down.

"Really?" Roy asked and Ed chuckled in understanding, receiving a smile from Riza. Jean yawned, "You done visiting?" Jean asked politely, "Though not much was said."

"It's a leery day." Riza said looking outside. Roy and Ed looked out the window; dark clouds were hanging low, "Great," Ed mumbled.

Suddenly Ed felt an urge to us the restroom, an intense urge. Sighing in defeat and picking up his crutch, throwing the blanket off his legs and standing. Making his way across the room Ed glance at Roy. The look in Ed's eyes could have killed him, humiliation in his eyes. Roy sent a comforting smile toward Ed, but Ed only looked at the floor then forward as he made his way to the bathroom.

"Excuse Me," Roy said standing and walking after Ed. Roy walked into his and Ed bedroom to see the bathroom door closed. "Ed?" Roy asked through the door. The door swung back away from Roy and Ed looked up at him, "Yeah?" Ed asked then looked down.

"What's wrong? Did I do something?" Roy asked taking Ed into his arms.

"No, I just didn't want them to see. I know they saw the leg on the floor but, it's weird and doesn't make sense." Ed said leaning on Roy.

"It makes perfect sense." Roy said. "You're ok then? You know that they won't tell a soul."

"I know." Ed mumbled.

"Ok then, lets go back in there." Roy said.

"I'm walking." Ed said firmly. Roy chuckled and placed a hand on Ed's back.

Riza and jean were standing by the door looking out, "We're going to leave before the storm hits." Riza said to Jean.

"Yes, yes. I heard you the first ten times." Jean said sarcastically.

"Leaving?" Roy asked.

"Yeah, we would stay longer but just look at the sky.

"I see, it's getting dark." Roy muttered.

Riza smiled then hugged Roy and Ed, "Sorry we can't stay."

"It's fine, also, I won't be in for work for awhile." Roy stated rubbing Ed's back lightly.

"Understood." Jean said then opened the door, "I'll talk to you two later then."

"Yeah. See ya two later." Roy said.

"Bye" Riza said turning to leave.

"Bye guys." Ed said with a smile.

Smiling Riza and Jean left and Ed yawned. "Lazy." Roy said with a smirk.

"Your fault." Ed said looking at the couch.

"Not entirely," Roy smirked.

"Hmm…" Ed hummed before Heading toward the couch, "I'll be right back," Roy said turning back to the bedroom. Ed sat in the middle of the couch. Roy returned with a pillow and tossed it on the end of the couch. Grabbing the blanket he sat down then pulled the blanket over Ed and pulled Ed closer, chest to back.

"I love this." Roy said softly into Ed's ear. Edward nuzzled Roy's neck, "Me too."

Roy smiled, "We show have slow days more often"

Ed chuckled, "Definitely"

Once again Roy turned his face to Ed and they allowed sleep to consume them.

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	28. Tubs and Trains

Chapter 28

Roy woke up to the sound of rain beating down among the house. Opening his eyes Roy looked out side to see the pouring rain. Sighing Roy moved himself and Ed a little when suddenly an completely under expected sneeze erupted from him. He turned his head away from Ed while he sneezed then looked down at the blonde that was sleeping on his chest, but now golden irises glared up at Roy.

"What?!" Roy asked.

"Gross bastard." Ed mumbled rudely plopping his head back down on Roy's chest.

"Well excuse the hell out of me. I had to fucking sneeze he said irritably standing up leaving Ed on the couch glaring up at him.

"Had to sneeze. Stupid ass." Ed mumbled grabbing the pillow and rolling away from Roy who stood across the room looking down at him with confusion on his face. Shaking his head he decided he was in the prefect mood to make a phone call.

Dialing the number Roy stood by the couch as Ed slept.

"_Hello Rockbell Automail, Pinanko speaking." _

"Yeah, This is Roy Mustang-"

"_I don't have time to listen to the shit that's going on in the military!" Pinanko snapped._

"Hey, this has to do with the fact Winry made a fucking lousy ass automail leg! NOT the fucking military." Roy yelled.

"_What?!"_

"I didn't stutter! Ed's is lying on my couch without a leg because it suddenly caused to much pain! He collapsed and had to remove it." Roy said firmly making it completely clear he was pissed.

"_Winry screwed up? You sure Ed didn't do it?" Pinanko asked._

"How could he? He's not a _dog_ anymore" Roy said.

"_Bring him up as soon as possible I'll look at him. And I want to speak with you too in person." Pinanko demanded hanging up the phone._

"Backwards old bat," Roy said putting down the phone.

Ed sat up suddenly, "You're a loud bastard!" Ed snapped.

"Get over it." Roy said turning away.

"What crawled up your ass and died." Ed asked.

"My ass?! You're the one that started bitching because I sneezed!" Roy snapped.

Ed blinked a few times, "Sorry. I can get pretty mean when I wake up." Ed said softly looking at the floor. Roy's facial expression softened, "It's ok Edward. I'm going to call the train station and see about tickets for either tomorrow or Monday." Roy said turning away.

Ed reached for his crutch and left to the bathroom looking at the clock as he pasted it in the bedroom, 5:45 pm.

Roy sat on the couch after ordering tickets for an early train tomorrow morning.

"You are aware we sleep a lot today right?" Ed asked coming around the corner.

"Well I figured that much, what time is it?" Roy asked.

"5:45" Ed stated.

Roy sighed, "Well we have a train that leaves at six tomorrow morning."

"That's early," Ed said as he sat by Roy on the couch.

"The sooner the better." Roy stated, then pick up the phone. "Be quiet"

"_Central Headquarters"_

"Patch me to Dean Davidson's office." Roy stated then told the woman his code.

"_Mustang?" _Davidson's voice was harsh.

"Sir, I'll need to take some more time off."

"_Mustang, you've been taking time off a lot lately. This better damn well be the last one for a long while."_

"Sir, it's a major issue in my life. I apologize, but I have to take these days."

"_If it's a major problem, share it with the world, Mustang."_

"It's personal, Sir."

"_That's an order." _Davidson snapped.

Roy looked at Ed then forward again, thinking quickly, "Family issues, Sir."

"_You're record state your parents both committed suicide."_

"I Have other family, Can I have the days or not?" Roy said controlling himself.

"_Take the days needed, but if you are late, or try to take more days off it won't go over with me." _Davidson spat hanging up.

Roy slammed the phone down and glanced at Ed then smiled at him, "I got the days."

"I'll go myself…you need to work." Ed said looking at Roy.

"No I told you I was going. Plus I have to, you need me when we see your brother." Roy said with a smile and leaving out the fact that Pinanko demanded his presence. Ed only sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "I need to shower or something." Ed mumbled. Roy looked over at Ed. "Well," Roy said standing and scooping up the blonde after picking up his crutch, "Let's get you in the tub."

"Damn it put me down!" Ed yelled, "I can walk Roy!"

"I don't care. Let me carry you." Roy said walking into the hallway.

"I can walk put me down!" Ed snapped.

"No…"

"Roy Mustang pu-" Ed was cut off when Roy sudden placed his lips onto Ed's.

Pulling his lips away Roy placed his forehead to Ed's, "Calm down." Roy smiled before continuing to the bathroom. Roy sat Ed on the side of the tub. He crossed his arms and looked at the floor. "I can walk, I'm not crippled." Ed mumbled.

Roy ignored those words, though they did bother him a little. Turning and leaving Ed alone Roy went to get Ed a washcloth and towel.

Ed was staring out the door when Roy returned, Ed offered a smile as Roy handed him the towel and washcloth along with a pair of clean boxers. "You want different cloths?"

"Just pants." Ed said setting down the cloths and standing putting his hand on the wall for support. Roy's heart dropped, he went to take a step to help Ed but was stopped. "I'll get it Roy ok?"

"Ed…" Roy said softly.

"Let me." Ed said and looked at Roy, there was something about the way that Ed looked at Roy; something in Ed's eyes persuaded him to allow Ed to do what ever it was he was doing.

Ed made his way to the shower and tossed his shampoo bottle across to the tub then his soap.

Coming back Ed reached out for Roy. Roy grabbed his hand and Ed pulled Roy into a tight hug, "See I can do it." Ed said into Roy's shoulder.

"I know, but I don't want you to fall." Roy said returning Ed's embrace.

"I won't." Ed said pulling away to sit on the side of the tub. Ed smiled up at Roy then turned on the water.

"I'll pack for you. You can get the rest yourself then?" Roy asked placing his hand on top of Ed's head.

"Sure can." Ed said with a smile. Roy ran his hand down to Ed's cheek, "Ok then. I'll be in the bedroom yell if you need anything, ok?"

"Kay," Ed replied taking his shirt off. Roy left and closed the bathroom door. He stood out side the door until he heard Ed turn the water off and slip into the tub.

Sighing Roy packed both there bags.

Ed finished bathing and went to push himself from the tub but slipped. Falling back into the water.

"Fuck." Ed muttered trying again and failing a few more times. "Damn it all! ROY!!!" Ed yelled in anger.

Roy ran into the bathroom seeing Ed in the tub looking pissed beyond belief. "What ya need?"

"Get me the hell out of this tub!" Ed snapped trying to pull himself up and failing again. Roy hurried over and lifted the distraught blonde out of the tub and wrapped the towel around him.

"You ok?" Roy asked helping ed stand up right.

"No! Damn it I can't even get out of the tub!" Ed snapped. Roy pulled the wet blonde into his arms.

"We're going to fix that as soon as we get to the Rockbells, Edward."

--------------

The next morning at the train station Ed made his way as quick as he could to the train. Ed sighed in relief when he discovered they had a private seat. Ed flopped down on the soft seat as Roy slid the door shut and put their bags in the compartment above their heads.

Roy stood in front of Ed and stretched up to relax he shoulders. Roy civilian shirt raised and Ed his automail hand on Roy's lower abs. Roy tensed to the feel and closed his eyes and stifled a moan. Looking down at Ed; who was smiling brightly with his hand still in place; Roy grinned at Ed. "Do understand what the does to me?"

Ed lifted his hand some and leant forward and kissed lightly at where he hand was. "Yes, I do."

Roy reached over and pulled the little line that shut the blinds so no one on the train could see them. But as quickly as Ed started he stopped and smirked up at Roy.

Roy looked down at Ed, "What'd you stop?"

"Felt like it." Ed smirked.

"My god." Roy groaned sitting down and looking out the window as Ed chuckled and pulled his book out of his jacket along with a pen and started writing.

After a long while Roy looked over at Ed, he was still writing but had been ripping page after page out and crumbling them before throwing them in the waste bin.

"What are you writing Ed?" Roy asked. Ed closed the book and reached up pulling himself up and putting the book deep in his bag.

"It's a journal." Ed stated. Roy watched Ed intently as he lifted himself up while the train was flying down the track. After Ed sat Roy let the breath, that he was unaware he was holding, out. Ed laid down using Roy's lap as a pillow. "Can I take a nap?" Ed asked. Roy shifted a little, "I don't see why not."

"Thanks."

Several hours pasted and Roy had just dozed off when a cold hand made it's self-known on his lower abs again. Roy gritted his teeth and tensed at the pleasing sensation feeling himself grow hard. "Ed don't tease me."

The cold hand moved south and grabbed a hold of Roy's belt pulling the buckle free. Then unbuttoned and unzipped his pants purposely brushing his fingers over Roy's erection.

Roy gritted his teeth and put his head back. Ed then moved to the floor between Roy's legs. Roy looked down at Ed. Ed put his flesh hand over Roy's hardness. Pulling Roy's length out of his boxers Ed licked the tip of the head.

Roy let out a low throaty groan through clenched teeth.

Ed then took Roy's head into his mouth and moved to take Roy's length in his own mouth. Ed swirled his tongue and bobbed his head.

Roy grabbed Ed's braid and pulled it out then twisted his fingers in the golden locks.

Ed suddenly began to hum and unknown tune. Roy body ignited and he threw his head back, mouth open and moaned.

Ed continued his actions earning more moans and other noises from Roy.

"Ed…I'm so…" Roy said between pants and finished with a grunt before Ed sucked hard on Roy's length.

Roy's grip on Ed's hair tightens to a painful level, not that Ed minded, and he moaned loudly as Ed swallowed his seed.

Ed lifted his head and dropping Roy out of his mouth with a pop.

Roy helped Ed up and then pulled his pants back on. Roy noticed the bulge in Ed pants. "What about you?" Roy asked still somewhat dazed.

"I'm perfectly fine." Ed smiled, and then leaned on Roy.

"Hey," Roy said and Ed looked up. Roy captured Ed's lips in a chaste kiss. After Roy pulled back Ed spoke, "Hey yourself."

They chuckled at that and feel into a light sleep as the hours pasted.

----------------

"Next Stop Ten Minutes!" A mans booming voice woke Roy.

"Ed?"

"Mm…"

"Wake up." Roy said running his hand through Ed's hair.

"Tired still."

"We're close to Winry's."

"Winry…bitch" Ed mumbled.

Roy laughed out loud, "Edward, get up."

Ed sat up with a yawn and stretched.

"We have ten minutes." Roy said.

Ed's eye widened.

"What?" Roy asked.

"We have a long walk! And oh my god." Ed said looking at his leg.

"I took care of that when you were in the bath. Someone with a horse and buggy will take us straight to the Rockbell's door."

Ed sighed in relief.

And sure to his word there waiting a horse and buggy as they left the train station.

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	29. The First Strain Of The Heart

Chapter 29

Pinanko stood from the kitchen table and looked at Ed as he walked into the house.

"Well pipsqueak it's nice to see you again, though I wish it were under different circumstances." Pinanko said.

"Alright, with the short jokes, both of you suck." Ed said making his way to the table and sitting his bag down. "Mustang you can sit too."

Roy smirked to himself then walked over and kindly greeted Pinanko.

"First thing I want to do is get you a temporary leg. I'm not fond of watching you hobble around." Pinanko said headed to the basement.

"Like I'm fond of hobbling…" Ed mumbled.

"It's to quiet for Winry to be here." Roy pointed out.

"She's probably asleep," Ed stated.

They listened to Pinanko dig around in the basement.

"Here this should work," she said after re-entering the room.

"How do you-" Roy started until ask but was cut off when Pinanko spoke.

"Know his measurements? I looked at Winry's papers after you called."

"Makes sense," Roy said blankly.

"We can install it here. Or on the 'operating' table." Pinanko offered.

"In here," Ed said.

Pinanko only nodded and proceeded to attach the leg.

------

"It looks a lot like the one dad made me." Ed mumbled as he and Roy sat on the porch outside after dinner. Pinanko was inside looking over Ed's auto mail, and thankfully Winry wasn't home, she was at another clients house until later tonight.

"Really?" Roy asked looking forward and leaning on a post.

"Yea, I like this one better, it's built a little different." Ed said standing and stretching. "I'm out of shape." Ed said looking down at his body.

Roy looked over to see Ed looking over his body twisting and turning. Roy watching this found it comical and let out a small laugh.

"What the hell are you laughing at?" Ed asked rudely only cause Roy to laugh harder. Ed glared at Roy then chuckled.

"I'm sorry Edward. But that was funny." Roy said standing.

"Oh well." Ed said looking out in the distance.

The sun was almost out of sight making the sky a funky reddish color toward the west, and night swiftly behind it.

"I love dusk." Ed said softly, "The sky looks like fire."

Roy looked over at Ed, "It's a unique time of day."

Ed looked up at Roy and smiled. They both turned and looked at the sky again.

'Fire like him' Ed thought.

'Unique like you Edward.' Roy thought closing his eyes.

"Hey guys!" Winry chirped behind them startling them both. Ed yelped and turned, but in the process falling off the porch.

"Ed!" Both Winry and Roy exclaimed.

"Yeah, I'm fine I only landed on my spine." Ed grunted as he stood. Winry laughed at Ed, causing Roy to glare at her.

Winry missed the gesture but Edward hadn't.

"It's good to see you two again." Winry said recollecting herself.

"Likewise." Roy said bitterly, Ed looked at him then to Winry.

"Yeah," Ed said.

"Granny said she'll get your automail fixed by tomorrow night but you should stay for a few days."

"We'll try. Roy had to take off work and needs to get back as soon as possible." Ed said quickly before Roy could say anything.

"Oh ok. What are you going to do in the meantime?" Winry asked.

"Well... I don't want to go in yet." Ed said.

"Me either," Roy agreed.

Winry yawned, "Well I'm going to head up to bed, Goodnight."

"Night," both Roy and Ed said.

After Winry left into the house Ed looked at Roy, "Want to go for a walk?"

"Sure." Roy said following Ed off the porch.

The two walked down the road for a long while talking aimlessly while the stars popped out one by one. Roy was chuckling at something Ed said when he put an arm over Ed's shoulders, "Are we going somewhere?" Roy asked.  
"Yes, actually, you'll like it. I think." Ed said turning off the road shrugging Roy's arm off his shoulders and taking his hand, "We have to cut through the woods. Then we'll be there." Ed said with a smile.

They walked through the woods, ducking and weaving to dodge limbs and trees, and then an opening appeared. They walked up the grassy hill the moonlight shining brightly down, "I love it here." Ed said letting go of Roy's hand.

"It's so peaceful." Roy said.

Ed was stargazing, the moonlight catching his eyes, hair and skin wonderfully. Roy was completely taken aback at his wonderful appearance.

Roy walked up behind Ed and wrapped his arms around him, "You're the best looking man I've ever seen." Roy whispered into Ed's ear.

Ed smiled and leaned back onto Roy, "Thanks, your not half bad yourself." Ed said holding Roy's arms as they both watched the stars.

Roy started swaying them a little. Ed turned and put his arms around Roy's shoulders and pressing his body to Roy's.

Roy wrapped his arms around Ed's waist as they swayed together. Ed's eyes closed as he laid his head on Roy's shoulder.

Roy closed his eyes and rested his head on Ed's.

Hours passed, after the finished dancing to the sounds of nature, they sat on the ground until Ed shivered.

"We should head back." Roy said pulling Ed up.

They walked home talking about nothing then quietly entered the house. Ed led Roy to their shared room, each taking their own bed the fell into a peaceful sleep.

-------

Roy woke to the sound of Pinanko working in the front room, so he decided to go in with her.

"Good your awake. You awake enough to do some learning?" She asked nicely.

"I will be after coffee." He said kindly.

"It's in the kitchen."

After Roy drank his coffee the quick study lesson and did whatever Pinanko said. He himself actually fixed Ed's automail, though it took several hours.

"We don't you wake up Edward so we can do this and you two go see Al." Pinanko said.

Roy stood and went into the bedroom closing the door behind him.  
Roy walked up to Ed's bed. Ed was lying on his back sleeping lightly. Roy bent down and lightly pushed his lips to Ed's.

At first there was no response, then a small sloppy one. Ed suddenly stopped and his eyes widened before shutting then hungrily returned the kiss.

Roy pulled away. "Good morning…well afternoon. It's like one o'clock."

"That it was." Ed smiled then sat up.

"Your legs done." Roy said turning away.

-----

After installing his leg Ed walked around outside a little.

"Roy fixed that you know?" Pinanko said.

"Really……WHAT?!" Ed said snapping his head around looking back and forth between Roy and Pinanko.

"Sure did Ed, there was a snagged wire. Pinanko said the only way that could happen is if it caught on the wheel they keep the wiring on." Roy said with a smile.

They all heard Winry stirring in the house.

"Should we take off then?" Roy asked.

"I want to go to the flower shop first." Ed said quickly.

"Ok, We'll be back later." Roy said walking off with Ed.

"So you fixed my automail?" Ed asked after the house was out of sight.

"Yeah, it's difficult and yet easy, I want to continue studying it." Roy said looking down at Ed.

"Automail, why? Why would you want to study that?" Ed asked looking away.

"Because, I love it so much." Roy said patting Ed's automail port.

"You can't stay here that long, and I highly doubt Pinanko will come with us." Ed said looking at Roy's hand as it pulled away.

"She gave me a list a books. That's how I learnt my alchemy." Roy said.

"Oh…don't study it just because of me, please." Ed said looking up at Roy.

"I've always found it interesting." Roy lied.

They walked on in silence until they reached town. They roamed the store for a while until Ed picked up two flowers of the same kind. "It's like your studying them." Roy stated.

"Trying to remember meanings. I was, at one point able to read flowers like they were books." Ed said picking up a yellow flower.

"Really? What's that one then?" Roy asked nodding at the one Ed had.

"It's called a Yellow Zinnia, it means daily remembrance." Ed said picking up another, "You want to get one for him?" Ed asked looking up at Roy with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah," Roy said taking it from Ed.

They roamed around; Ed telling Roy the meaning of countless flowers, though he only bought two. Ed on the other hand bought eight flowers two of the same kind. Ed had walked out of the store while Roy paid for the two he bought. "Miss? Do you guys deliver to Central?" Roy asked the cashier.

"Yeah but it will be a few Days before they arrive." She said.

"That works fine send these flowers to this address…" Roy gave here all the information she requested then left.

"That took long enough," Ed snapped walking off.

"Ed? What was that for?" Roy asked catching up.

"You were flirting weren't you?!" Ed snapped again.

"No!! I may be labeled a womanizer, but not a two timer, or cheater! I would never." Roy exclaimed.

Ed turned and looked into Roy onyx eyes, shocked that he could read Roy's emotions. His eyes held a pleading, and hurt gaze. "I'm sorry…don't be angry." Ed said looking away, if it wasn't for the fact they were on a crowded street he would have hugged Roy tightly.

Roy smiled at Ed then swiftly kissed his cheek and walked away, "I'm not bad."

Ed caught up to Roy. "PDA? That was reckless!"

"What's wrong? Thought you liked risks."

Ed blushed but continued walking with Roy.

The cemetery was coming in view and Ed pace slowed and his hands trembled.

Roy noticed the change in his lover and put a hand on his back, "It's going to hurt a lot, Ed. A lot."

Ed only closed his eye and nodded.

They walked up to Trisha and Al's graves. Ed took a deep shaky breath. Ed turned toward his mother first dropping one flower at a time, "I'll explain them to you when I give Al his, ok mom?" Ed asked.

Roy Gave Ed his room while he talked to his mother. Ed then turned toward Al. "Alphonse, mom, this flowers have different meanings." Ed said explaining them as he dropped them on Al's grave one by one. "The Crimson rose, forever mourning. The Black Rose death and farewell. The Yellow Zinnia, daily remembrance. The Tea Rose, I'll always remember you." Ed said before his shoulders started shaking. Roy walked up beside Ed but Ed spoke before he could, "Talk to Al, I need to recollect myself." Ed said walking off for a minute.

Roy turned to Al, "Hi Alphonse. You're brother's been pretty sick. I don't want you to worry though. He is making very good progress. He helped me choose your flowers. He said the Iris meant friendship and the yellow Zinnia meant daily remembrance." Roy said dropping his flowers by Ed's. "We all miss you so much Al."

Roy turned to Trisha's grave, "Rest in peace Trisha." Roy said then bowed his head. Suddenly Ed came up from behind him and slipped under Roy's arm.

"Mom, Al, I really hope this isn't going to make up roll over in your graves but, I'm in love with Roy." Ed said with his head hung low. Roy just stood silently with Edward for a long time until Ed fell to his knees.

"They hate me don't they?" Ed asked looking up at Roy.

"Edward they could never hate you! Never! I'm sure they're happy for you." Roy said bending down and holding Ed's face in his hands.

"How could you know?" Ed asked tears running down his face.

"I don't. But they are your family Ed, and they wouldn't hate you." Roy said.

"I hope," Ed mumbled.

"Ed…" Roy said wiping Edward's cheeks, "Do you want to stay longer?"

"Not really." Ed said sadly, "Though I should."

"Don't stay unless you want to." Roy said running his hands down to Ed's shoulders. Ed shook his head.

"Then lets go." Roy said helping Ed up.

Ed and Roy walked back to the house silently. Ed still crying softly and silently, but it didn't go unnoticed by Roy.

They walked into the house only to be greeted my none other than Winry herself.

"You ok Ed?" she asked.

"Yeah," Ed mumbled and Roy glared down at her.

"What's with you two? Why won't you talk to me?" She asked.

"I don't see it necessary." Roy snapped.

"Roy!" Ed snapped looking up at him with eyes still filled with tears.

"Don't see it necessary! What the hell? Of all people you should treat me better." Winry snapped.

"Why?" Roy growled.  
"Stop…" Ed whispered.

"Because you kill mom and dad! Dumb ass." Winry snapped.

"Hey! It's not like I wanted to kill innocent people. Fuck you, like I should treat you different because of anything!" Roy snapped.

"Stop it!" Ed yelled pushing Roy back and glaring at Winry.

"Shut the fuck up you bitch! I'm sick of your mouth! Have been since before Al died!" Ed yelled.

Roy was taken completely aback, and hand still on his chest. Winry stared at Ed then to Roy.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Pinanko yelled. Taking in the scene of Ed on the defensive, Roy taken aback, and Winry near tears.

"Your fucking granddaughter!" Both Ed and Roy yelled.

* * *

**_READ THE FOLLOWING!_**

**I'm sorry to say but this story is in deed nearing it's end...just a few more chapters then...sequel!!!!!**

**So please! I'm forewarning you if you want to know when the next one comes out please put me on author alert because i'm not going to sit here for 2 days straight emailing everyone i'm sorry!**


	30. Strained Hearts

Chapter 30

_(Last Time)_

"_Hey! It's not like I wanted to kill innocent people. Fuck you, like I should treat you different because of anything!" Roy snapped._

"_Stop it!" Ed yelled pushing Roy back and glaring at Winry._

"_Shut the fuck up you bitch! I'm sick of your mouth! Have been since before Al died!" Ed yelled._

_Roy was taken completely aback, and hand still on his chest. Winry stared at Ed then to Roy._

"_What the hell is going on in here?" Pinanko yelled. Taking in the scene of Ed on the defensive, Roy taken aback, and Winry near tears._

"_Your fucking granddaughter!" Both Ed and Roy yelled._

(On with the Story)

Winry gapped at the two men standing from of her. "Me?!" she squealed. "I believe Mustang started this."

"And you brought it on!" Roy snapped Ed hand pressing harder on his chest.

"Bullshit!" Winry snapped.

"Bullshit yourself!" Roy snapped back. "You had to mention Ishbal!"

"You could have held back!" Winry snapped.

"SHUT UP!" Edward voice boomed through the house. "I don't want to hear shit about that! Winry, Roy drop it!"

Pinako stood back and observed the threes actions.

"Ed, why are you siding with him?" Winry asked.

"Because that's the side I choose!" Ed snapped. Roy smirked down at her. Pinako caught it all, the smirk, Ed's defensives, and something's up. That's all that ran through her head.

"Why? He's a murdered! I have no clue why you would live with him! Stay here and live with me and granny!"

"You, you, you! Does anything else go through that head!? Automail and You!" Ed snapped.

"Ed?" Winry said.

Ed only glared at her. Roy doing the same. Pinako though spoke up, "Winry leave those two alone."

"Granny?! Why are you siding with them?" Winry asked.

"Because, they have every reason to be pissed at you, and you chose the wrong time to be happy and smiley with them." Pinako stated.

"How?"

"You ruined Ed's automail! You think we just came to visit?" Roy snapped.

"Well…" Winry said slowly.

"Are you out of your damn mind?!" Ed snapped. "How many times have I came 'just to visit?" Ed asked. "The times I did I didn't want to!"

"Then why did you?!" Winry yelled/

"Alphonse demanded it! He always, 'When we going to see Winry?' if it wasn't for him you'd be lucky to ever hear my voice!" Ed snapped. Roy though didn't like the turn it took and stepped closer to Ed.

"Only because of Al?!" Winry said.

"Yes only for him!"

"But I thought you had feelings for me…"

"Wha- Like love? How could I love some one when every time I look at them I see Al's lonely face? You always had your head to far up my ass to see how much Al loved you! He loved you with all his heart! But you always pushed him away and turned to me. Open your fucking eyes and get a life!!" Edward yell.

"I-I don't…understand…" Winry said.

"Fuck me running!" Ed yelled then swiftly before Roy could act he grabbed Winry's shoulders and shook her. "Listen to the words coming out of my mouth! Alphonse loved you more than I ever had!"

Winry whimpered; Roy placed a firm hand on Ed's left shoulder, "Winry, I think it best you keep your mouth shut." Roy said as Ed let go of her and stepped back. Ed was filled with pure rage, his body shaking and eyes hard, teeth grit, and fisted clenched tightly.

"What was that bastard!?" Winry snapped.

"Hey, that wasn't a fucking threat it was a warning. I should let him kick your ass!" Roy snapped.

Pinako stood back just watching the display in front of her, unwilling to try and intervene in fear for her own well-being, plus she felt it necessary they work it out on their own.

"What the hell? Ed why are you staying with him?" Winry asked.

"Because I feel welcomed and he can shut his mouth." Edward snapped.

"I would think you would want to stay with someone who knows everything about you…" Winry said.

"He does." Ed snapped again.

"I know more about you than that bastard!" Winry snapped harshly.

"That _bastard _saved my life! Several times! And fuck no you don't know everything about me!" Ed growled.

"I know your past and about your drinking!"

"My point. You didn't know until Roy said something, I've drank, abused drugs, picked fights, and I'm suicidal. And I'm gay!" Ed yelled.

Roy's eyes widened at Ed admitting it all. Hell, he nearly fell over at the look on Winry's face. 'I'm sure she'll need new pants at this one. Looks like she shit herself!' Roy thought.

"WHAT!?"

"I didn't fucking stutter!" Ed snapped.

"Well I'm glad you admitted it to everyone Ed, I take it you and Roy are secretly together?"

"Yes," Roy said, anger hinting his tone along with satisfaction.

"That's bullshit! Gay? What the fuck ever! You told me on the-"

"And that shit was when I was drunk or high, possibly both! I didn't realize I was until not to long ago."

Winry glared up at Roy, "You made him gay. You fucking asshole! You murdered my parents, and turned my best friend gay!" Tears rolling from her face.

"I didn't do shit other than offer a help to a friend in need! Now I'm not the cause of each and every problem of yours!" Roy yelled.

"I made the first move!" Ed growled.

"Get out! I don't want two faggots in my house!" Winry screamed.

"What was that bitch?" Ed asked stepping forward.

"ENOUGH!" Pinako yelled. "Boys ho for a walk and calm down. I don't care if it takes a few minutes or a few hours I'll be waiting for you to return Edward, you to Roy. Winry I think we need to talk."

Ed just turned out the door, Roy right behind him. "Let's go to the hill." Said pulling on Roy's hand. They practically ran to that hill. "Why are we running?" Roy asked as they neared the turn into the words.

"It makes me feel better." Ed said. They turned and ran through the strip of woods and up the hill Ed stopped and laid on his back looking at the night sky. "I didn't know it was dark." Ed said out of breath, "I'm really out of shape."

Roy lay down beside Edward, "You ok?"

"Yeah, she pisses me off."

"It's ok love. Se isn't worth being in your life if she can't except you for who you are." Roy said looking at Ed.

Ed sighed. The night air was cold, 'damn cold whether.' Ed thought. A shiver erupted through his body.

"It's cold out Ed." Roy said pulling Ed into his arms. Roy was still wearing a light jacket, but pulled it off and draped over Ed's shoulders. Ed shivered a little longer then curled up to Roy getting as close as possible and Roy wrapped his body around Ed. They lay like that for the longest time Ed yawned and gave Roy a chaste kiss on the neck. Roy turned his head to Ed and kissed him on the soft skin behind his ear. Ed gasped at the feel he melted to the touch.

Roy smirked against Ed's skin and suddenly bites Ed's nape.

Ed half stifled a moan. "Not out here Ed," Roy said softly then licked where he had bitten Edward.

"Then stop doing that." Ed said leaning onto Roy.

Roy chuckled and wrapped his arm around Ed. A few minutes pasted and Ed let out a stressed sigh.

"What's wrong?" Roy asked.

"That's what I want to know." Ed stated.

"Eh?" Roy looked at Ed. "Did I miss something somewhere?"

"I mean being gay…what's so bad about it?" Ed asked.

"I don't know. I guess it's be cause they don't understand. People seem to fear things they don't understand." Roy said.

"Make's sense, but it's not like we are evil." Ed said.

"I know. It doesn't make sense. I don't really care what people think, truthfully the only reason I even considered keeping it secret is for my job. I need the money." Roy said rubbing Ed's flesh arm and back.

"I changed my mind about being 'Fullmetal' again. Fuck it, I couldn't do it anymore." Ed said then turned his face into Roy's nape, "Not without Al."

"Desk job?" Roy suggested only because he knew deep down no matter how much he denied it, Edward Elric did enjoy the military.

"I can't stand that boring shit." Ed said.

Roy chuckled lightly. "Well we'll figure something out; if you think you need a job that badly."

Ed chuckled, "We'll cross that bridge later."

Roy inhaled deeply and then let it out slowly. A cold wind blew and Ed shivered.

"Should we go back?" Roy offered.

"I'm cold, not cooled off." Ed said curling up to Roy again.

"I love you Edward." Roy said then kissing his head.

"I love you too." Ed said leaning on Roy.

They talked aimlessly for a few hours until Ed decided he was to cold to function.

* * *

Pinako was sitting the kitchen when they came back in. 

"Hey boys, listen Winry won't bother you again, but feel free to stay as long as you want." Pinako said.

"Thanks I think we'll leave tomorrow though." Ed said.

"Whatever you two want." She smiled

Ed walked over to Pinako and gave her a quick hug, "Thanks for accepting me."

"Anytime Edward, and you too Roy. If your important to Ed your important to me." She said with a smile.

"I'm going to bed." Edward said.

"Likewise and thank you Pinako." Roy said.

* * *

Roy laid down in his chosen bed covered up lying on his stomach face in the pillow. Then he felt the bed dip. Ed lay down by Roy, "she knows so who cares." Ed said then Roy pulled Ed close. 

"You like cold right. To bad we aren't home." Ed said turning his back to Roy. Roy spooned Edward, "Damn my luck."

* * *

Roy and Ed left quickly after they woke avoiding Winry. The rain ride went smooth and they were happy to be home. 

"HOT SHOWER!!" Ed yelled as he dropped his stuff and ran into the bathroom.

Roy stood taken aback. "Ok then." Roy picked up Ed's things and walked into the bedroom then the bathroom. Ed had the showerhead running and was only clad in his boxers while he was bent over the sink brushing his teeth.

"You brush your teeth before the shower?" Roy asked.

"Yes!" Ed said spitting then rinsing his mouth with water. Roy walked up behind Ed and pressed up against him, "I need a shower too."

Ed nearly choked at the comment but quickly recollected himself and turned to Roy.

Roy pressed they're lips together a felt Ed melt to his touch.

Ed unbuttoned Roy's shirt and slid it off his shoulders then glared at the undershirt blocking his view.

Ed lifted the shirt off Roy, then put his hands on each of Roy's shoulders and dragging his hands down Roy's chest. Scratching one side and reddening the other.

Ed scratching at Roy's sides drove Mustang crazy! The cold automail, the scratching sensation, and the heat of the seaming room. Ed quickly removed Roy's pant's boxers and all. Roy pulled Ed's boxers of and pushed him into the shower.

The hot water treated the mood better.

Things slowed under the water. Slowly passionate kisses and caresses where shared. Small grinning movements passed back and forth between the two until Roy needed more at the same time Ed did.

Roy bit down hard on Ed's nape before licking a trail up behind Ed's ear.

Ed ran his hand up Roy's spine and neck and gripped his hair.

Roy pushed Ed up against the wall of the shower and lifted him up. Ed wrapped his legs around Roy and put his automail over Roy's shoulders while still holding a soft grip on Roy's silky black hair. Roy reached over and grabbed the bar of soap lathering up his hand he took Ed into his hand, stroking his shaft slowly and rubbing his thumb over the head.

Ed moaned and out his head back on the wall, "Roy please."

Roy slowly pushed himself into Edward. Ed gritted his teeth and moaned.

Roy pulled out and pushed back into Edward slowly at first.

"Faster…. harder." Ed said between heavy pants.

Roy gladly obliged stroking Ed in time with his trusts. Ed cried out loudly when Roy hit his sweet spot hard.

"Again!" Ed said through clenched teeth.

Roy trusts became a fasted and quicker until Ed screamed and roughly bit Roy's neck as he climaxed, sending Roy over the edge as he bit down on Ed's nape.

They stayed in the position until Roy caught his breath and sat Ed back to his own feet.

A smile broke across Ed's face. Roy reached out and ran his hand through Ed's hair, "Let me wash it."

Ed amazingly let Roy wash his hair for him.

As they stepped out of the shower and dried off Roy noticed something in Ed's eyes/

'Is that….guilt?' Roy thought.

* * *

**_THERE WILL ONLY BE ONE MORE CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ONE! _**

**_Then i'll be on the new story like white on rice!!!!!!!!_**

**_love to all!_**

**_Please Review!!!!_**


	31. Broken Hearts

Chapter 31

Roy woke first realizing the house was freezing. "Damn" He whispered pulling Ed closer and tightly wrapping the blanket around both them. "Did you know it's freezing in here Edward?" Roy asked softly.

"Fuckin…freezing….you….warm" Ed mumbled.

Roy chuckled and looked at the clock, groaning he rolled over and off the bed. The cold air hit his naked body making Roy want to dive back into the bed. But he had to work or his ass was grass.

Roy dressed himself before going to wake Ed.  
"Edward, get up." Roy said.

"Go away Mustang let me sleep." Ed mumbled.

Roy reached down and pulled the covers off of Ed's nude form. Ed sat up straight, "Fuck, why the hell is it so cold?" Ed yelled.

"I didn't turn on the heat, kind of forgot." Roy said shrugging.

"Kind of forgot; my ass!" Ed said.

"Nope, didn't forget that. Now get your ass in gear we got to go." Roy said walking out of the room.

Ed's eyes widened then he dressed. Ed hurried and met Roy in the living room, "I'm ready."

"Ok then let's go." Roy said standing. He walked over to Ed and kissed him on the lips. Ed kissed back softly, he opened his mouth when Roy's tongue licked his bottom lip. Their tongues battled for dominance, Ed let Roy win. Roy explored the cavern like there was no tomorrow. After breaking for necessary air Ed looked to the floor.

"What's wrong?" Roy asked lifting Ed's chin. What Roy saw in Ed's eyes worried him, pain and guilt. 'Pain again. Why? Dear God why?' Roy thought.

"Edward? What's the matter?" Roy asked again.

Ed slapped a fake smile on his face, "Nothing Roy. Lets go." Ed said turning away and grabbing his journal out of his unpacked bag.

"Ed.." Roy said softly.

"Drop it." Ed snapped opening the door.

"Edward?! What's wrong with you!?" Roy asked in shock,

"I said nothing, okay, nothing!" Ed said looking back at Roy his eyes pleading.

"For now. Okay?" Roy asked.

"Yeah…"

* * *

The Day was slow, Roy had a huge mound of paperwork to do and Ed was the only thing keeping him from doing it, so Ed made a decision closing his journal noticing he had wrote a lot in a little time.

"Roy you need to work, your going to get fired." Ed said.

"I won't get fired, and I'm, doing my work." Roy said.

"Mustang. I'm going to the library for a little bit ok?" Ed said standing.

"Lunch? Want to run home for lunch?" Roy asked with a smile.

"Sounds great, come get me kay?" Ed asked before leaving.

Ed walked down to the library waving at those whom waved at him. He made his way to the back corner of the library and sat down at the table reopening his journal and writing.

Hours passed when Ed Felt a soft hand on his back.  
"Hungry?" Roy asked.

Ed's stomach growled, "Seems so." Ed stated quickly closing his journal.

"Is that a journal or an autobiography?" Roy joked.

Ed just chuckled and stood.

The ride home was quiet. Once home they made themselves a simple lunch and had just sat down to eat when the doorbell rang.

"Ed will you get that?" Roy asked.

"Lazy ass." Ed said standing.

Roy chuckled and watched Ed walk to the door. Then smiled to himself. Roy listened to Ed talk to the woman at the door and the door close.

Ed returned with a blush on his face and a bouquet of randomly assorted flowers.

"Calla Lily, Daisy, Gardenia,….um Red Poppy, White Tulip, Full Bloom Rose." Ed said turning the flowers as he said them. Ed picked up the card, "No mater what happens I'll always love you" Ed's emotions were mixing, making it hard for Roy to 'read' his eyes.

"Beauty, loyal, Secret love, pleasure, beautiful eyes, and love. Roy why'd you do this?" Ed asked sitting on Roy's lap.

"I wanted to. And I'm glad that's what those things say I couldn't remember any except the tulip, rose, and calla lily." Roy admitted wrapping his arms around Ed.

"Thank you." Ed said before leaving to put them in water then finished eating.

After eating Ed went to the bathroom to brush his teeth; feeling he really needed to. Ed reached up on the shelf in the bathroom knocking over something. Ed bent down and picked up a small silver chain necklace.

"You like it?" Roy asked.

"Yea," Ed said sitting it back down.

Roy walked into the bathroom grabbing the necklace and slipping it over Ed's head, "Then it's yours." Roy said placing a chaste kiss on Ed's lips.

* * *

They got out of the car at HQ and looked to the side seeing a small coffee shop.

"Go to work I'll be right back!" Ed said turning to the coffee shop.

Roy blinked a few times then replied, "Ok…"

Ed walked to the coffee shop but didn't go in. Instead he went next door to a small flower shop.

After leaving there he carefully placed the flowers in his jacket, then went into the coffee shop.

* * *

Ed handed Roy his coffee and took his own soda (he was grateful they had) and sat on the couch with his journal again, writing the day away.

* * *

The two men walked into the house Roy heading straight to the shower. Ed pulled the two flowers out of his jacket and put them in a small drawer. Ed's head dropped as his fingered the journal in his jacket. "Damn it." Ed whispered before tossing it on the table and wiping away a tear. Ed turned around and took off his jacket and shirt, the cold chain landing on his chest. A shaky breath left Ed's lips. Ed laid down on the bed covering up and closing his eyes tight suppressing tears.

Roy walked out of the bathroom and looked at Ed whom was laying on the bed all curled up. Roy sat on the edge of the bed next to Ed, "What's been bothering you, Edward?" Roy asked rubbing Ed's side.

"I told you nothing, I'm just tired right now." Ed said trying to sound calm.

Roy climbed over Ed slipping under the covers and pulling the blond close. Ed snuggled up to Roy as a shake went through Ed's body. "You ok?" Roy asked.

"Just cold and sleepy." Ed said.

"If your sure." Roy said.

"Your medicine Roy." Ed said quietly.

Roy groaned, "I'm not taking it tonight."

"It was prescribed to you for a reason, why don't you want to sleep?" Ed asked.

"I'd rather watch you." Roy said running his hand up Ed's back.

"Just take your medicine." Ed said with a trembling jaw, not letting his voice break or his eyes be seen.

Roy sighed and got up to take his medicine. When he came back in the room he had the pill in one hand and water in the other. Taking the pill he gave Ed a funky look, "I took it."

"Good, now come to bed." Ed said lightly.

Roy crawled into bed and cuddled up with Edward.

After an hour Ed stood from the bed, Roy lay there out cold from his medicine. Ed put his shirt on and his jacket. Ed reached up and took the hair tie out of his braid and put it on his wrist before kissing Roy's lips and leaving the room.

Ed pulled the two flowers out of the drawer and placed them on his journal along with his hair tie.

Ed grabbed his bag from when he went to Pinako's. and pulled out a different hair tie and putting his hair up.

Ed walked to the front door with his bag and walked out with tears in his eyes.

* * *

Roy woke up in the morning noticing the lack of heat. Roy stood and went to the kitchen, no Ed, living room, no Ed. Bathroom no Ed!

"Edward!" Roy called out in the empty house. Roy walked quickly in and out of the rooms of the house until two flowers caught his eye.

Ed's hair tie and journal lay with the two flowers. He opened the journal and read through it. It was the bad of his past written out, and then it changed.

_You're my friend_

_Your my love_

_You got me out of bed _

_But soon I'll be dead_

_I feel so cold_

_But you are so warm_

_This mask I hold_

_Keeps you unaware _

_Though I act so bold_

_I can't stand this life_

_One swift move is all it takes_

_Just deep enough to make me shake_

_I hope it won't_

_But I know it will_

_Break your heart_

_To know how_

_I fell apart_

_You tried so hard_

_It almost worked_

_I still love you!_

_With all I am_

_With all I was_

_You are my forever love (1)_

Roy's heart dropped to his stomach and tears stung his eyes but continued to read.

_I am just a blank sheet of paper,  
This fool's about to write you a letter.  
To tell you that he's sorry,  
For the way he did you wrong.  
To ask for your forgiveness,  
For leaving you alone. _

He's been looking down at me seems like forever,  
He takes the top on and off his pen.  
It's like he can't decide just what he wants to say,  
If he'd just tell the truth I'd be on my way

But he just stares at me,  
I just stare at him.  
He don't know where to start,  
To say he doesn't want it to end.

Now it's one hour later,  
And I am still a blank sheet of paper.

Sunlight is shining through the curtains,  
He's almost asleep pen in hand.  
There's a tear in his eye,  
That refuses to fall.  
If it would land on me,  
That would say it all.

But he just stares at me,  
I just stare at him.  
He don't know where to start,  
To say he doesn't want it to end.

Now it's four hours later,  
And I am still a blank sheet of paper.

And he just stares at me,  
I just stare at him.  
He don't know where to start,  
To say he wants it back again.

Now one broken heart later,  
I am still a blank sheet of paper.(2) 

Roy's head dropped for a second then raised to read the last thing.

_Roy,_

_This may be hard for you to understand. I've found myself to much of a burden for your shoulders to bare. Please don't look for me. I'm not going to kill myself, just leaving. I still and always will love you. You never stop loving your first._

_Please be happy with out me! Please! Roy live happily with my burden's on you!_

_Ever since the night I tried to bring mom back. I've been a burden to you and the older I got the more I pushed on you._

_You almost lost your job because me. I'm not worth that. _

_Please understand I'm doing this for both of us._

_I love you so much._

_Edward_

_P.S. The purple iris means I'm sorry, take care. And the full-bloomed rose I still love you!_

Roy dropped the book and brought his hands to his head letting out every tear he could offer. When he calmed enough to talk and picked the phone up.

"Riza? Jean?" Roy's voice cracked.

"Roy? What's wrong?" Riza exclaimed.

"Come here." Roy said before hanging up.

Minutes later Jean and Riza ran into the house. The sight they saw broke their hearts. Roy was hunched over crying hard, unable to breathe.

Riza took Roy into her arms and talked to him while Jean rubbed his back and read the journal that was on the floor. Roy calmed and Riza made him lay in bed.

"What happened?" Riza asked.

"Ed left. He thought he was to much of a burden." Jean said.

"I'm going to look for him."

"NO! Don't!" Roy yelled. "It's what he wants."

"Roy?" Jean asked.

"Whatever Ed wants or sees fit, whatever keeps him from suicide, I'd do anything. Even let him leave." Roy said before breaking again.

It was a day of grief for Roy. Riza called Davidson and chewed his ass out. And they just stayed with Roy for the day.

After a long, long time the phone rang.

For some reason Roy picked it up. "Mustang" his voice cracked.

"………."

"Hello?"

"I love you, I'm ok." a small, quiet, raspy voice said.

"Edward!" Roy said his voice breaking.

"Don't look for me. I love you." Ed'svoice cracking.

"I love you too, Edward. Please Ed…"

"I can't" Ed said and hung up. Ed turned in the phone booth he was at and slid down and cried.

Roy hung up the phone and looked at Riza and Jean. "He's ok…and I'll try to move on."

* * *

**It's FINISHED!!!!!!!**

**(1) MINE I WROTE IT DON"T STEAL PLEASE!!!**

**(2) Tim McGraw Blank Sheet of Paper**

**Please tell me what you think please!!!!!!**

**Sequel! Soon! Stay Tuned!!**

**please don't kill me for the ending!!!**


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